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I squeeze his hand. “It’s going to get worse. This place is completely packed every year. I don’t usually bothercoming down here because of how crowded it gets, but it’ll be fun, I promise.”
Luke doesn’t respond. I can all but taste the mixture of nerves and excitement roiling in his gut. That little event in the park in Everett was the first Pride celebration he’d ever been to, and it’s not a tenth of what he’s about to wade into. He’s leaping from a puddle into the Mariana Trench, and he’s only had a few weeks to adjust.
“We can always leave if it’s too much,” I say. “Babs will be happy enough to have us come home.”
He ended up adopting her after all, and that has filled me with almost as much joy as him choosing me as his boyfriend. Luke and the sweet old café cat bonded the moment they met, and she already has a favorite napping spot in his house where she sleeps in the sun every day.
“I know.” He smiles over at me when a red light stops the crowd at a crossing. “Babs won’t mind as long as we get home in time for her dinner. And I want to be here.”
I believe him. The past month has been a whirlwind. I’ve watched him make huge strides, and I haven’t pushed him through any of it. We’ve gone out to restaurants. He came to visit me at the café. We saw live music in a local bar — and when one of his co-workers happened to show up, he didn’t even panic. He introduced me as his boyfriend and that was the end of it. We got some drinks together and watched the show and it was so incredibly … normal.
I’m still getting used to that word. I’m still adjusting to having something that’s both normal and extraordinary. Luke and I are figuring this out together, and I think we’re getting the hang of it.
The crosswalk sign changes, and the crowd flows across the street. We hit the beginning of the sprawling complex that comprises the Seattle Center. The Museum of Pop Culture sits to our right, advertising some kind of upcoming musical event. The crowd thickens as we near the Space Needle, a slender spine jutting toward the sky and crowned, at least for this month, with a rainbow flag.
Then we really hit the thick of it. The crowd slows as bodies press in close. Food sizzles all around us, filling even the open air with the scents of spitting oil and sugary confections. Vendors sell overpriced water bottles amid the oppressively hot summer day. Music thumps around us, not one distant song but several. There are multiple stages set up throughout the Center, each with its own lineup of artists. We pass the ticketed beer garden with its long line spilling out onto the sidewalk and see the vendors lined up under the awnings.
It’s chaos and bustle, an assault on every sense, but I love it. I love being adrift in such a massive sea of queer people. The crowd around us ranges from folks in ordinary clothes without a rainbow in sight to full leather gear to rainbow tutus to costumes. There’s no dress code here, no rigidly defined expectations. You come to this place howyou are, however makes you feel good, and for the most part no one around you bats an eye.
For myself, I chose a pair of my tiny, tight dancing shorts with a bright rainbow print. It’s way too hot to wear more than those and a crop top, and even that little bit of clothing traps way too much heat as Luke and I navigate the crowd.
Luke is wearing his usual slacks somehow, but I did get him into a black tank top with a rainbow on it. It shows off his big, strong shoulders, but I don’t know how he’s not melting in those pants.
I search for a bit of relief, both from the heat and the crowd. I lead Luke toward one of my favorite parts of this giant celebration. We have to cut past the food stalls, shouldering our way through the crowd. When we pop free of the crush, we spot a fountain before us. It sits in the center of a huge bowl. People recline all around the edges of that bowl, but only a few brave souls go all the way down into the water itself. The fountain spits up a massive spray and people scream with delight as the water hits them. Smaller jets fan out afterward, the rhythm changing in an ever-shifting water show that soaks onlookers.
Luke and I find a semi-shady spot along the rim of the bowl. Even this far back, we get an occasional mist borne to us on a friendly breeze.
“This was always my favorite place to hang out when I came to Pride here,” I say. “It’s usually a little less crowded. Plus, you get the spray from the water.”
“It feels amazing,” Luke says, flapping his shirt at himself to try to cool down.
“You could take it off, you know,” I say, leering openly at my boyfriend’s beautiful torso when he flips his shirt up to fan himself.
He smiles over at me. “I bet you’d like that.”
“I would, in fact.” When he rolls his eyes, I add, “Hey, you get to look at allthisall day. It’s only fair I get a look as well.”
“You chose that outfit yourself. No one made you dress that way.”
“Wow, is this the thanks I receive for getting all cute for my boyfriend? Unbelievable.”
He leans over, kissing me right there on the edge of the fountain amid a crowd of people packing the Seattle Center. Only a few weeks ago, every single piece of this would have been impossible.
“There,” he says. “Thank you for looking cute.”
I heave a dramatic sigh and slump against him. We remain that way for a while, sitting at the edge of the fountain and watching people run through it. Some of them are naked. Many of them are almost naked. No one seems to care all that much either way. It’s just people having fun in a fountain on a beautiful, hot day in a place where they feel like they can be relaxed and free and comfortable in their own skin. That’s something that I’ve always loved about Pride downtown in Seattle, that sensethat whether you arrive in business attire or nothing at all, no one will care either way. You can be yourself, as long as you’re being kind to everyone else around you.
I hope that’s what Luke is feeling as he sees this. I told him we didn’t need to do this, but he insisted that he wanted to be here. I thought maybe the crowd or the public nature of it all would freak him out, but he’s taking it in stride. At least he seems to be.
“You still okay here?” I ask, sitting up straighter so I can gauge his reaction.
He simply smiles. “Yeah. It’s kind of hot, but this is crazy. I’m glad I got to experience it. Thank you for being my tour guide.”
It’s incredible how calm he’s being about all this. It feels like a totally different Luke from the one I met barely more than a month ago.
“You know I’m proud of you, right?” I say. “For doing this. For being here. For all of it.”
He scratches at the back of his head. “You don’t need to be proud of me. I’m just living my life. Finally.”
