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Caelan
The day has finallyarrived. Roan had assured us this morning we would be home by nightfall. Still, the day is dragging longer than a minute on a treadmill. Exhaustion dogs our steps, but we are happy. Well, happier. Last night’s emotional outpouring had been the cathartic release we all needed, taking a giant weight off our backs. It felt like we could start to move forward. Which is what we are doing. While walking.Again.
Edith and Tor lead the charge home, Edith having scooped Tor out of my arms way back, threading her arm through his to question him relentlessly about his old life bartending and dancing at the club. They gossip like old maids, Edith detouring every so often to pick a flower or two, threading them into their hair. At one point, it looks like Tor is trying to teach her how to do body rolls, but she just looks like a fish flopping out of the water.
Apparently, dancing is one of the very few things out of my witch friend’s repertoire. His warm laugh filters back to us every so often, causing Roan to mock me for my ridiculous heart eyes. Theo even gets in on the action, teasing me for being head over heels for his brother.
Theo seems lighter today, even if he is still reserved with me. Whenever he cracks a joke, he always subtly side-eyes me to make sure I am not offended. Tor had told me he was a loner growing up, always years, sometimes decades, younger than his peers at school, making friendships difficult. Being with us seems to bring him out of his shell. Edith is determined to smother him in Big Sister Energy until he’s healed and Seff has taken him under his wing. It could only be good for him.
Early this morning Seff had shifted into his wolf form, saying he needed it. Tor had looked at me questioningly at the time, but I’d just shaken my head. Back years ago, when we were dating, I’d asked Seff what it was like when he was in his wolf form, whether he was fully conscious or if he was fully animal. I’d been so curious, and more than a little envious, about shifting and I’d pestered him abouteverydetail. True to form, he never minded my constant questioning, always answering the best that he could. It was hard for him to explain, because for him it was just normal, how he lived. He’d never known anything else.
But the way that he explained it was that it was like there was a second consciousness in his mind. Him and the wolf. While he was in human form, the wolf was there, present, aware, but never in control. He knew things that upset the wolf or made it happy, but Seff was fully in control of his body.
When he shifted? Things were a little different. He was still aware and conscious, but the wolf was mainly in control of his instincts and actions. Once he’d said it was like he experienced everything through a filter. I couldn’t understand it. I’d hated that at the time.
He’d also explained that he needed time in his animal form regularly, or he’d get anxious and out of sorts. It was like a scratch under his skin that had to be itched or he’d go mad. It was always super weird to fall asleep next to his human body and wake up with a furry dog smelling up the bed next to me.
But today he is living his very best canine life, racing through the woods, sniffing at all the smells, barking at all the creatures he finds, running continuous circles around us, panting loudly, threading through our legs, tripping us over him continuously.
Seff excitedly runs off chasing a rabbit he spooked out of the brush, Theo laughs loudly and with genuine happiness for the first time. When the sound rings through the trees, Tor pauses for a moment, turning over his shoulder to glance back at his brother, a soft smile on his face. There is a warm feeling in my chest, flowing through from Tor, contentment and happiness rolling together. I catch his eye and wink, making him blush.
After a short while, Seff trots back to the group, tail wagging, tongue lolling out of his mouth, looking a little too proud of himself. Theo’s delicate facemanages to turn a rather spectacular shade of green when he sees the traces of red marring the mottled grey of his muzzle. He halts, spinning to face Roan and me, his voice a horrified whisper-yell. “Did Seffeatthat rabbit?”
Roan, walking with a particularly large branch he’d picked up along the way, grimaces, sharing a knowing look with me. There is ahighprobability that Seff had himself a little snack in his wolf form. It’s gross, and I am not sure what they do in the city, but it’s expected with shifters in the Woods. The polite thing to do is not talk about it usually.
Seff himself breaks the tension, sidling up to Theo and nosing his hand with his big snout for a pat. Theo caves instantly, crouching down to give wolf—Seff a big scratch behind the ears, causing Seff’s big tail to wag furiously, thumping hard against my leg.
“You wouldn’t eat a poor defenceless bunny, would you?No,you’re such a good boy! Such a good boy!” Wolf—Seff barks happily at Theo’s baby-voice praise, then trots off to run circles around Edith and Tor.
There is a beat or two, as we watch him run playing with the others, Theo’s head cocked to the side, and then he realises what he’s done and he turns to Roan and me and our barely contained laughter.
“Did I—Did I just call Seff agood boy?” He is obviously mortified, a dark pink blush colouring his deathly pale cheeks.
Roan’s laughter spills over first as he doubles over with full belly laughter. I can’t hold my own in either, laughing until my cheeks hurt and I am breathless.
“Don’t worry, we’ve all done it.” I try to reassure Theo as I catch my breath. And it is true, it is very easy to forget that he isn’t actually a giant, friendly dog when he is a human, let alone in shifter form.
Roan finally recovers too, putting a big hand on Theo’s shoulder and nodding seriously. “That’s very true. And don’t worry.” He winks down at Theo, who looks like he would very much like the ground to swallow him whole. “I’ve heard he’s into that sort of thing.” Roan chuckles again, walking off with his giant stick.
Theo’s eyes go comically wide, the pink in his cheeks getting dangerously pinker, the tips of his pointed ears flaming, as he looks at me, knowing he is myex. I wrinkle my nose, scrubbing at my overly long beard hair as I nod at Theo’s unasked question.
“Yeah.” I wrap an arm around Theo, gently encouraging him to keep walking, which he does, reluctantly, his ratty sneakers shuffling through the leaves. “Yeah, he is.”
***
We manage to make it back to the Tavern just before nightfall. We definitelyhearit before we see it, the lively sounds of whatever band is playing that evening filtering through the trees, followed by the raucous sounds of the patrons. As the sounds get louder, followed by the smells of slow-cooking meat and beer, we are reinvigorated. Despite our exhaustion and hunger and all the aches and pains riddling our bodies, we manage to power through with a level of energy that had been seriously lacking as the day had dragged on. Roan is definitely the most inspired, taking the lead and charging ahead, no doubt eager to get back to his tavern. The thing is basically his entire life.
Edith dances through the trees, moving roughly to the beat reaching us. A folk band is playing tonight by the sounds of it. It’s lively and fun, even if it’s not really my kind of thing. I can feel Tor’s anticipation through our connection, though there is a heavy thread of anxiety woven in there, too. I can’t wait to take him home and show him around properly this time. Sure, there are things to sort out, big things. But as I watch him walking ahead of me, his purple skin glowing in the dying sunlight, hands fluttering animatedly as he talks, his gorgeous face split wide with a genuine smile, I know we’ll be ok.
There is a giddy feeling in my stomach as he looks back at me past the others, and I know he can feel it too. His smile grows softer, sweeter, then he throws me a wink before turning back to keep chatting with Edith.
When the path clears and we enter the grounds of the Tavern, Theo tenses beside me, eyes wide, locked on the Black Stump looming ahead of us. His feet falter and I grab his elbow to keep him steady, pulling him closer to me.
“You ok?” I peer cautiously down at him, and his golden orange curls bob as he nods in the dim yellow lights from the Tavern; the sun has dipped low, barely hanging on above the towering trees casting a brilliant rosy orange haze over the clearing.
On the Tavern grounds, the party is in full swing out on the expansive patio, with large groups of different beings talking, drinking and dancing around fire pits and tables. A group of mages seem to be comparing their elemental magic, throwing balls of fire and water around with reckless abandon.
There is even a horde of orcs. They don’t come round very often, but it is always a big night when they do. Giant and brutish with dark green skin and zero social skills, they drink the place dry every time and are guaranteed to start a fight. It has to be wildly overwhelming for Theo, who, from what Tor told me, led an extremely sheltered lifebeforethe whole kidnapping thing.
