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Upstairs, I walk past his room and into mine.
I make sure to lock the door. I don’t want any visitors tonight.
40
ARSEN
“Where is she?”
“Who?” Polina is standing in the living room, dusting the sofa, the shelves, and, more often than not, the empty air in front of her. She swallows nervously. “Oh, do you mean Laila?”
“Yes, I mean Laila. We’re supposed to leave.”
Actually, we were supposed to leave half an hour ago, but Laila wasn’t downstairs. So I sent Polina up to check on her. I would’ve gone to get her myself, but my wife doesn’t have much interest in seeing me.
The bolted door last night made that abundantly clear. Let no one say I can’t take a hint.
I’ve had twelve hours to mull it over, and I still can’t wrap my head around what happened. One second, she was kissing me into a wall and riding me on the floor until I could barely stand. The next, she was storming into her bedroom and locking the door behind her.
Polina continues dusting nothing whatsoever. “I’ve been thinking… We’ve ordered more than enough supplies for the baby. I don’t think you need to take Laila shopping today.”
“Last night you said it was a ‘lovely idea.’”
“Yes, well…” Her face puckers like she’s sucking on something sour. “I changed my mind. I mean, Laila is pregnant. And her hip—it might not do well walking all around a store.”
“Then I’ll carry her.”
“I think she’s tired,” she says suddenly. “The poor thing is exhausted. You reschedule, and I’ll make her some tea, and we’ll all?—”
“Polina.” I reach over the couch and snatch the feather duster out of her hand. “What do you know?”
She clams up. Her lips purse, and she hits me with an indignant scowl that she’s been giving me for so long it’s probably ingrained in her DNA. “My job is to clean. I’m not supposed to?—”
“You’ve had your nose in everyone’s business since the day you walked through the door. Don’t start pretending otherwise.”
She lifts her chin, but doesn’t deny it.
“Now,” I continue, “where is my wife?”
“In her room.”
I blink at her. “I asked you to go get her.”
“And she told me she wasn’t coming out. She told me…” Polina sighs. “Laila told me that she—and I’m quoting directly here—‘has zero percent interest in seeing you.’ She said that—again, direct quote—‘since you like to do everything else by yourself,you can enjoy your own company on whatever date you have planned for her.’ She said?—”
I don’t hear the rest of what Laila might’ve said because I’m already halfway up the stairs by the time Polina registers what is happening and calls after me. “If you’re trying to connect with her, you should?—”
“What I’m trying to do,” I growl, whirling around and storming back down the stairs, “is decorate my child’s nursery. That’s what Laila and I are doing today. That’s what is happening here.”
This isn’t about luring Laila out of her room. Or striking some kind of livable balance between fucking and fighting.
And this isn’t about the look I saw in Laila’s eyes last night as she sprinted out of the nursery.
Polina arches a shrewd eyebrow. “Maybe ‘decorating your child’s nursery’ should be a quiet affair. Something you and Laila do here at the house. Together. While you talk.”
I shake my head. “I have no idea what you’re talking about.”
“She doesn’t care about grand gestures, Arsen!” Polina cries suddenly. “Laila cares about family. That’s why she’s doing any of this to begin with—for her mother. I think you’d do well to remember that when you talk to her.”
