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He searches my face once more, but this time, he finds whatever he’s looking for. He nods his head. “You have my word.”
We turn and head up into the palace. I have to figure a way to get all the guards to follow me. If I draw them to the palace garden, it will be in the opposite direction Wylan is?—
“Come with me,” he demands, just as we reach the main corridor.
“I can’t,” I tell him, meaning it. If I escape, what I’m accused of will fall on my mother and Ryuu. They will be implicated for it and pay for my foolish mistake.
“I can’t leave without you,” he snaps. “Not only because I know what they will do to you, and I don’t want to ever see thathappen, but because Jarek will kill me if I allow anything to happen to you.”
I shake my head at him while keeping an eye out for any guards. “I need to follow through with this. I will draw the guards to me. Find someplace to hide until they come for me. You should be able to make a quick exit with them distracted.”
“And if they try to kill you?” he hisses.
I narrow my eyes on him. “I am not that easy to kill.”
“Seren—”
“Go.” I push him, turning him, hoping he’ll find a good hiding spot while I distract the guards. “And tell Jarek I give my approval.”
He stops and turns, giving me a boyish smile. “You do?”
“But break his heart, and I’ll rip out yours,” I warn him with just a hint of a smile, letting him know I’m onlymostlyserious.
He pauses and squints his eyes. “I don’t know who I should be more afraid of, the lieutenant or you.”
“Me.Definitelyme,” I warn him. But instead of taking my warning seriously, he smiles and shakes his head, a determined glint in his eyes.
“I’ll come back for you and get you out of here. I promise.”
“I can look after myself. Take care of Jarek for me.”
“I will. And I’ll see you soon,” he promises once more before turning and disappearing into the night.
I turn and head for the guards’ watch and soon come upon one of the guards who take me to and from my cell.
“You.” His eyes widen in recognition. I take his blade before he notices and give him a smug smirk before turning and running, slow at first so he has a chance to catch up with me.
“Stop! The Sidus has escaped,” he shouts out, running after me and making a scene just as I had hoped. It garners more attention, and more and more guards join him.
I make my way through the palace and out to the wide-open gardens. They’re on the opposite side of where I hope Wylan has gone.
I stop halfway and turn to them as they surround me.
“How did this Sidus killer get out of her cell?” the guard with the scar on the side of his neck snarls.
Killer…I tighten my hand on the blade. He’s right, Iama killer. And was one long before I got Visha killed.
Instead of turning the pain inward, I let it out. I push it into the blade in my hand and strike, attacking the nearest guard.
More and more guards show up, but I don’t stop; I keep fighting when all I want to do is lie down and cry. For Visha. For my foolish mistake. For the gut-wrenching pain that now fills my spirit and soul.
I keep fighting because it’s all I know. And I don’t know how to fill this black hole that has somehow opened up inside me.
I want to cry and scream and shout. But I can’t. I can’t because I don’t deserve to.
It was my fault, no matter what Wylan said. If there was no dark creature here, then whoever released it would not have been able to do so. She would still be alive and I… I wouldn’t feel this rock crushing against my chest.
My body moves, stabbing, ducking, and fending off as it comes second nature to me.
