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What the fuck have I done?
ONE
AINSLEY
“Baby, wake up.”
Killian’s voice floats in the darkness, soft and warm like velvet running over my skin. My head swims, my mind in the clouds as my lips slowly curl upward in a lazy smile. The sound is like a melody that he sings just for me.
I could listen to the sound of his voice until I die.
“Ainsley, baby.” His voice shifts. It breaks as it laces with panic. My body shakes involuntarily and the smile falls from my lips. “I need you to wake up.”
I don’t want to wake up. I want to stay right here, in the darkness, wrapped up in his warmth.
I shake my head in protest, but I don’t know that it actually moves. None of this feels real. I can’t fully grasp the concept of time right now, but I feel like I’m living in the midst of a fucked-up, bad trip instead of just high from shooting dope.
“Ainsley!” Killian’s voice echoes through the darkness, bouncing from the corners of my mind. “Wake up, baby, please.”
The urgency, the way he pleads, I know that I have to wake up. My eyelids stick as I slowly peel them open, feeling my lungs expand as I finally take a full breath. I’m in his arms, situated next to him with his body pressed against mine. It wasn’t a dream. Killian’s really here.
His bright green eyes meet mine as he hovers over me. My vision is blurry at first, but everything comes into focus as I stare back at him. His brow furrows as his eyes desperately search mine and runs an exasperated hand down his face.
My eyes narrow as I watch his hand.
Swollen, bruised, and covered in blood.
“What happened to you?” I eye him skeptically, knowing if my instincts were logical, I should move away from him. Instead I stay in his arms, reaching out for him. “Are you hurt?”
Killian shakes his head. “That’s not my blood.”
“Whose is it?” I take his hand in mine, swiping my hand across the dried blood. It’s still fresh, but not fresh enough to be wet. I glance around the room, feeling the confusion as I notice that we’re at home and on my bed. The events that led up to this hit me like a ton of bricks.
Graduation, the party, Killian with Amethyst. All of it led to me going into the bathroom with Ezra. The last thing that I remember was Ezra sliding the needle under my skin and injecting the heroin into my bloodstream.
Killian’s emerald eyes burn holes into mine. “Ezra’s.”
No, no, no.
Dread fills the pit of my stomach as I tear my eyes away from his. Killian didn’t like Ezra from the start, but he has no idea who he is fucking with. Ezra’s family practically owns more than half of this town and they have the right people in their pockets. They will ruin Killian’s life for this.
“Killian. What did you do?” My voice is soft as I wrap the plush hand towel back around his battered knuckles. “Ezra didn’t press charges the last time. His family won’t let you get away with this.”
Killian’s jaw clenches. “I found you in the bathroom with him. I know that he helped you shoot up.”
My heart pounds harder, the sound of my blood rushing through my head fills my ears. As if things weren’t already bad, they just got fucking worse. How the hell could he possibly know? My eyes bounce back and forth between his, searching them for I don’t know what. Approval? Sympathy? Salvation? I really wanted to tell him myself, but I think that he already knew from the moment he found me.
“Did you know that it was dope before you did it the first time?”
I swallow roughly. “I thought it was coke.”
Killian’s nostrils flare and he nods. “I don’t regret what I did.”
Neither do I.
Killian sits us upright as he wraps his fingers around the back of my neck. He cups my chin with his other hand, tipping my head back to look at him. “I can’t stay here.” His green irises pierce mine. “This place is going to be crawling with cops soon and I can’t be here when they show up.”
I slide my hands up his arms, wrapping them around his ink-stained wrists. “I’m coming with you, Kill.”
