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There’s no way I’m going to fall right back to sleep after that nightmare. The sight of her holding out the bloody shards of the broken bottle haunts me, and I deal with it the only effective way I’ve found, by grabbing my sketchbook.
As I work, I keep an eye on the window, waiting to see the others leave. Instead, Calli comes out with the guy, grabs some stuff from the RV, and they go back inside. Minutes later, all the lights go out.
Jealousy is a snarling monster inside me, eating away. Is it only the two of them? I didn’t see anyone else. Were they already inside? Are her friends catching a nap before they continue traveling, or did she bring a man home with her? The thought that she may be in his arms is unbearable.
Do you love her? You never loved me.
I do, I love her.
I can’t let her love me.
It’s dawn before I manage to get back to sleep and my first waking thought is Calli. The RV is still in the driveway but I’m happy to see a woman sitting on Calli’s steps. It wasn’t only the two of them last night. My jealousy is unfair, but that doesn’t make it any less fierce.
After getting dressed, I take my coffee out to my porch and sit in the sunlight. It’s unseasonably warm and supposed to stay that way for another day before a sharp temperature drop.
I’m debating whether to text Calli when she comes out of her house, stops to talk to the woman on her porch for a moment, then walks up the driveway.
“Welcome back. Did you have a good trip?” I ask, moving to sit on my top step as she approaches. Christ, she looks more beautiful than I remember. Just looking at her hurts.
“It was amazing. I have lots of pictures to show you. I even got backstage at the Sudden Outburst concert and had them sign a shirt for me.”
“Got backstage as in you hopped another fence or got passes?” It wouldn’t be the first time she’s sneaked backstage from what she told me.
A grin grows on her sun kissed cheeks. “Passes. They have pretty competent security.” She takes a seat next to me on the step. “Is your internet out? I can’t get mine to work at all.”
“Ah, yeah. We aren’t going to have service for about two weeks. They’re upgrading the whole area. We’ll have a much better high-speed connection once it’s done but for now, we’re screwed.”
“Well shit.”
I don’t want to put off the inevitable with small talk. The knot growing in my stomach is too tight. “Calli, I’m sorry.”
She nods, fidgeting with her hands. “I know. You already apologized for following me, and you don’t need to apologize for anything else that happened.”
My heart lives in my throat when I ask, “Are we alright?”
The seconds of hesitation last a year. Have I lost her? Serious eyes meet mine. “Never follow me like that again. I understand why you did and that you didn’t mean any harm, but I have enough issues with anxiety without wondering if I’m beingwatched. I need you to swear you’ll never do that again because I promise our friendship won’t survive it a second time. Do you understand?”
“Never again. I swear.”
She nods and continues, pulling her gaze from mine. “As for the night we spent together, I didn’t do anything that I didn’t want to do. We both wanted it at that moment. I can leave it at that and let it go if you can.” Before I can respond, she quickly changes the subject. “My friends are leaving tomorrow. We’re going to party tonight, have a bonfire behind my cabin, grill out some steaks and stuff. Do you want to join us? Silver is coming too.”
There’s nothing she could ask me to do right now that I wouldn’t jump on to spend some time with her. “Absolutely. What can I bring?”
“Actually, I was going to see if I could borrow your body parts cooler.” Her little smirk is so adorable.
“I suppose I could find another place to store the limbs temporarily.”
I’d give anything to know what’s going on behind those eyes as she gives me a long look before wrapping her arms around me. The unexpected hug is soothing in a way I can’t begin to explain. Her warm, soft body close to mine, I breathe in the scent of her hair as she buries her face in my neck. Her words make everything right.
“I missed you too.” After we let go, she gets to her feet. “I’ll see you tonight.”
The day inches by while I keep myself busy. A trip across the state line to the dispensary helps fill the time. Along with my edibles, I get some flower for Calli, since she prefers it. The only thing she asked me to bring was my cooler, but I swing by the liquor store for some beer as well.
A call from my dad surprises me, but he gets straight to the point after hellos are exchanged. “Your mom said you aren’t coming for the holidays again.”
“She said you were going to Aunt Gina’s.”
“She also said you’re invited, and we’ll be there for six weeks. You can’t clear a few days to spend at a beach house?” he retorts, having none of my bullshit.
