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“When you didn’t show up to Dr. Amundsen’s office, I was heartbroken. I didn’t think you cared, and after all that was going on between us, it was the last straw. I had so much guilt because I had slept with Harry, and I wanted to tell you. But when you didn’t come, I believed you deserved it. I know it was wrong to think that.”
“Lana, you should have told me. You should have waited. I was so in love with you.”
“I know. I made a poor decision. Anyway, I left the doctor’s office against his advice and came straight home. I packed some of my things and went to my parents’ apartment. My father was less than happy that most of the money he spent on our wedding was going to be wasted. It was all he seemed to care about rather than how I felt. I stayed up all night thinking about our relationship, and I decided it was better to be apart. So the next day, I went and packed up the rest of my things. My mother helped me, and my father’s driver took all my things to the limo.”
“You know how I felt when I came home and found the note with your engagement ring sitting on it? I was devastated.”
“So was I. I kept wondering why you couldn’t put me first.”
“I would have. It was a critical time for Eltech. I was torn between what I wanted to do and what I knew I should do.”
“I left for the west coast a week later. I figured I needed a change of scenery. My cousin Vanessa lived in Los Angeles. My father lent me some money, and I went to stay there. I sold my apartment, paid him back, and settled in my own place. I got a job working for an attorney as a legal secretary. It didn’t pay as much as my father, and I was living beyond my means. By the time I realized it, my bank account was down to a few thousand dollars. This was a few years later just before I met Declan.”
“You could have come back to me anytime. I would have taken you back,” I say softly.
“I know. I was a fool. I had little money and was late on my rent when I met Declan. I thought he was too old for me, but he pursued me, showering me with gifts, and I finally gave in. We started dating, and he asked me to marry him. I said yes because I knew he could provide for me. I didn’t really love him because my heart belonged to someone else, you.”
My heart clenches when she says this. All the women that I slept with that looked like her, would never be her. I should have found her and begged her forgiveness.
“Declan was kind for the first couple of months we were engaged. Then I saw a different side of him, especially when he was drinking. He could be harsh and critical, but when he was sober, he was kind and charming. He knew I wanted to be closer to my family, and his children all lived on the east coast, so he agreed to move to New York. My heart leaped when he said we would. Do you know what the first thing was that I did? I looked to see if you still ran Eltech. I had been keeping tabs on you for years, but since I was with Declan, I didn’t do it regularly.”
I take her hand and kiss the back of it. We were always so close and yet so far away.
“Declan never asked me to talk to you about behaving when we saw each other in public. I knew we would cross paths, and I wanted to see how I would react to you. You made my heart flutter. Seeing your gorgeous face and being near you, breathing in your scent, I wasn’t sure I could deal with it and not want to have sex with you.”
I chuckle, “Well, we found out the answer to that was no.”
“Yes, and the first time we made love again, I knew there would never be another for me. I just didn’t know how to cut it off with Declan. I thought I would be the laughing stock if I ran out of another wedding. I think Declan knew yet he went through with it anyway. I was stupid. He was cheating on me and making me feel horrible about myself. I should have ended it.”
“You knew about Sasha Sinclair?”
“She isn’t the only one. Declan has a few women he cheats on me with. But he’s a kinky bastard. He wanted to do things that I had no desire to do. These other women let him do whatever he wants. He wanted me for his arm, to go to events and charity balls. Our prenup had all kinds of milestones. Our first wedding anniversary I would get one million dollars. Our fifth, ten million. If I managed to stay thin until then, I would get a bonus of another five million.”
“Are you fucking kidding me?”
“No. I went along with it. I promised I wouldn’t have children, and he even entertained me getting my tubes tied. I told him I wouldn’t do it. I want a child. He told me if I trap him by getting pregnant, he’ll divorce me, and I get nothing. He would leave the child and me in poverty.”
I clench my fist under the sheet. I want to hurt this man for all the physical and emotional abuse he put Lana through.
“You know the rest. I don’t have to tell you, do I?”
“No. I don’t want to hear anymore.”
“You were always with me, Zane. I always had the locket with me. When we first started dating, Declan told me it was tacky. I took it off to please him, but it was always with me, in my purse, tucked in my bra, I even hooked it on the waistband of my panties. I couldn’t let you go.”
She starts to cry, and it tears my heart out of my chest. We were apart when we didn’t have to be.
“Come here,” I hold out my arms, and she scrambles onto my lap.
“I love you, Zane,” she whispers into my chest.”
“I love you too. I never want to be parted. Don’t run ever again. You owe it to me.”
“I know. I promise.”
Chapter 17
The next week, I’m back in the office, and Lana has moved into my apartment, our apartment. It’s been over a week, and Ian Blair is finally in the United States. The Blair family has a meeting with Declan armed with the accounting that Lucian provided. I’m proud of my best friend for working long hours to get all the figures together.
