AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Still pretty rude, Paul.”
“And I said fuck off, Lucian.”
I give Olivia a tight smile and cross my arms, then lean against the wall.
“This is a private conversation,” Paul says irritably. “Can you leave?”
“I think I’ll stay. I work here too.”
“Don’t remind me.”
I stand my ground, making sure he’s civil and decent to Olivia. He gives me a dirty look as he leaves the office, all the while shoveling a handful of M&M’s in his mouth from his pants pocket.
“Lucian, why don’t you just tell him you’re his boss?”
“That would defeat the purpose. I prefer not to talk about this here, though. Can you go to lunch with me?”
“To the hotel?” She almost looks expectant.
“You’re a little sex fiend,” I tease quietly.
“I haven’t had it for months,” she returns easily.
“You’re going to wear me out. I’m going to have to hide from you.”
“I doubt that.”
“You haven’t answered my question. Lunch?”
“Can’t. I have to finish this, but I thought we could have dinner at my apartment tonight.”
“Will we actually have dinner?”
“Come over and see.”
We never made it to dinner. The minute we got through the door of Olivia’s apartment, we had sex against the wall, half undressed and jonesing for each other’s bodies. From there, we stumbled to her bed and made love for the rest of the night.
Later, as she sleeps next to me, I debate whether I should go home or stay and get up early. I can’t wear the same clothes for another day. I pull her into my arms, and she mumbles my name as I curl around her body, breathing in the sweet scent of her skin.
A couple of hours later, I wake to fear rolling off me in waves. My heart is beating so hard at the dream that woke me, and I feel like it’s going to rip out of my chest. It wasn’t bad enough to make me scream, and Olivia is still in my embrace, but I slide my arm out from under her and go to the kitchen for a bottle of water.
It was so vivid, like Cassie was alive, accusing me of cheating on her. It started when I walked through the door of the home we shared together with a sheepish look on my face. From there, her body changed, shrinking and withering until she was nothing but skin and bones. Her sunken gray eyes fixed on me as pointed a bony finger at me and howled about my evil deeds.
I had to go home. Some of my clothes are piled in a heap by the foyer. The other half is in the bedroom, so I quietly collect my garments, pulling them on as I went along. I stood, watching Olivia sleep for a moment, then crept out of her apartment like a thief in the night.
Sleep didn’t come once I got home, so I put myself through a punishing two and a half-hour workout. By the time I finished, it was almost 5:30 AM, and the sun was well on its way up into the sky. I take a quick shower and turn on the news while I shovel a bowl of oatmeal with raisins down my throat.
Between my arrival home and now, Olivia called at 6:30, but I let it go to voicemail. I felt like a piece of shit on all fronts for ignoring her because she didn’t deserve this treatment. Olivia was a wonderful person, and if I have any chance of making this work, I need to do better.
I text Zane to tell him I wasn’t going to be in the office today. I also couldn’t go to Lexi’s for dinner tonight because I would have to face Olivia. Instead, I text to tell her that I woke up and felt sick. I didn’t want to give it to her, so I went home.
My mistake was moving too fast. I failed to attend the second bereavement meeting this week, and now I would have to wait until Tuesday to dump my guilt.
Hunter calls me in the afternoon, asking if I was still attending the bachelor party. I once again forgot about it and the fact that Noah and Vivian were planning on coming to stay at the loft this evening. Noah joining in on the festivities was something I was looking forward to it because my brother and I rarely spent time together, even when I lived in Boston.
And while he wasn’t the most compassionate person, I need someone to talk to—someone who understood my loss. I had no idea how to deal with what was happening in my life. I was conflicted because I really liked Olivia, but I loved Cassie. At least I wouldn’t need to face Olivia until Wednesday. This weekend I would be tied up with the bachelor party and then brunch on Sunday with the guys if they were coherent. Then on Monday, I had an interview with the second person from Futile, a woman named Dee Hanover. On Tuesday, I had scheduled another interview with the second guy from Comix, Steve Stahl. Wednesday, I planned on stopping in to the office to discuss which candidates seemed the most capable.
Following all of that, next weekend was Hunter and Rory’s wedding. I would be busy with the rehearsal dinner on Friday, the wedding on Saturday, and the sendoff brunch on Sunday. I just hope my conflicted feelings won’t ruin Olivia’s time. After that dream, I wasn’t sure if I could jump back into bed with her even though I wanted to. My brain wouldn’t let the horrible images of Cassie go away.
