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She pulled the stool over to the refrigerator and climbed on it. Opening the cabinet, she pulled out a bottle of Jack Daniels. It was the one bottle she hadn’t dumped. Ava might have abstained from drinking for awhile, but she needed something now. She couldn’t wait for tomorrow to come and find out how it would turn out with Xander.
She poured a small bit of the whiskey into a glass and slammed it back. It started to warm her, and she felt less jittery. She poured another small bit and sipped at it before she capped the bottle. She sat on the couch sipping at the liquid until she drained the glass. She was calm now, but her mind was going in a million directions. She was never going to sleep tonight.
Ava went into her bedroom and pulled the worn t-shirt of Xander’s out of the drawer. She wore it to bed, hugging herself as she lay on the soft sheets. It was the closest thing to him right now.
That night she barely slept and at 3:42 AM she stopped trying. There was no use forcing something that wasn’t going to happen. She got up and put on her workout gear. It was cold outside, and the wind was blowing, but she was determined to run to the Sunset gym. They opened at 4:00 AM and she would probably be the first one there. She pulled on her jacket and wool hat and went out in the cold. By the time she got back, she was exhausted.
Ava was going to have to try and survive on two hours of sleep. She needed a sharp mind for what she was going to have to do today. She showered and put her hair up in a ponytail, then dressed in slacks and a sweater. She didn’t need to entice him today; she needed to be humble. She passed on taking the subway again and took a cab to the office. It was just before seven when she removed her coat and checked her email.
There was a note from Jacob letting her know he was going to be in late today. It was perfect because she needed time to talk to Xander. She was nervous as she waited for him in the alcove. Fifteen minutes later she heard him open the door to his office. As she rounded the corner, she saw that he had left the door partially open. She pushed at it and slipped inside quietly shutting the door. He was hanging up his coat and did not hear her come in.
“I have to talk to you.”
He whipped around to face her.
“What do we need to talk about? You’ve already made it clear that you don’t want to be associated with me,” He growled.
“Don’t be like that. I found something out last night.”
“Ava, I don’t need you tearing my heart out over and over.”
“Would you shut the fuck up and listen to me! You’re so stubborn.”
He closed his mouth and sat at his desk with his arms folded waiting to hear what she had to say. She scrolled through her phone and called up the email that she thought he had sent and handed him the phone.
She watched the expression on his face change from anger to pain as he read the screen.
“I would never… I didn’t send this. Oh my God, who would do this?”
“You said that I wounded you, too. How?”
He laid her phone on his desk, and she watched as he scrolled through his. He handed her the phone, and she read the email he called up. She put her hand over her mouth as she read it.
“No, no, no. I wouldn’t ever say something like this. I don’t blame you for what happened. You didn’t use me.”
She kept shaking her head, and he came around the desk to kneel in front of her, much the way he had at the engagement party.
“Someone deliberately tried to break us up, and it worked.”
“That isn’t all,” she admitted.
“There is more.”
“Someone had put a bunch of applications on my phone to track me and read all my texts and emails. I found your number blocked as well as your email. Dani’s boyfriend Roger gave me instructions on how to check, he’s the one that found the hidden apps.”
Xander got up and stalked around the office clenching and unclenching his fists. His face had turned crimson.
“Do you know who did this? I will kill them with my bare hands. Do you know how guilty I felt when I got this? It just reinforced the self-doubt that I had that you didn’t love me.”
“I’ve always loved you. We are destined for each other.”
She reached into her sweater and pulled out the chain that held the ring he gave her years ago. He sat down on the couch and patted the seat next to him. She slowly sat down, and he pulled her into his arms and pressed his lips against hers pushing his tongue into her mouth. Giving way to him, she molded her body against his.
“I want you for always,” he whispered as he clamped his mouth onto her neck and gently sucked. She started to feel heated as he ran his mouth over her.
“Xander, stop, please. You know they still have the non-fraternization policy in effect. We can’t have sex here.”
He stopped what he was doing and looked at her.
