Page 69 of Not So Truly Yours


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“You don’t have to thank me. I loved being there with you. If circumstances were different, I’d be demanding you take me on all future group trips.”

She smiled. My stomach sank.

There were no future group trips for her. This was a one-and-done kind of thing. She seemed to get it, but my insides snarled in protest. We wanted Daisy with us for all the fun and difficult things. In the relatively short time I’d known her, she’d started to make the hard things bearable, the uncomfortable things a breeze.

I could get used to this.

I already was.

Next time I went somewhere with the group and she wasn’t with me, I’d feel it in a significant way. But if I kept letting her in, relying on her to be content, I’d go searching for something to take her place without her.

My reckless nature would have me reaching for a bottle. Alcohol had a history of filling more of my hollow parts than anything else.

I exhaled, twisting my grip on my steering wheel.

Therapy, friendships, work, Clementine, Westie, Lisie, baby Joey, my house.

Alcohol wasn’t all I had. I had lists of things and people who filled me up. I just had to be careful not to add Daisy to it. She wouldn’t be around long. Once she got over that ex-boyfriend and her hang-ups with her last name, she’d see she didn’t need me at all.

I couldn’t be reckless here. Daisy was too special and far too fragile from the destruction of the last guy for me to be anything less than meticulous with how I handled her.

I would not be another person to hurt her.

I’d do my best not to hurt myself either.

Chapter Twenty-three

Daisy

My mother kissed my cheek. “Thanks for comin’ over to help. Unfortunately, it’s been nonstop busy the last two weeks.”

I squeezed her around her shoulders. “Make sure you’re taking breaks, Mama. And ask me for help before you’re run so ragged.”

She waved me off and bustled around her desk to collapse into her chair. Her sigh was heavy with exhaustion. If I’d gone downstairs to check on my dad, he would’ve sounded the same. Landry and Tom worked here full-time too, but my parents were the worst martyrs, claiming they should do all the overtime since my sister’s family was young.

They had a point and should have hired outside help, but they were too stubborn to admit it. They’d rather work until they collapsed and drove their children out of their minds with worry.

“Tomorrow’s Reed’s last day of school, isn’t it?” I asked.

“Yes, it is. Finally. Seems like the school year really dragged on.”

“Should we take him out to dinner? Or do you want to celebrate at home?”

My mother stared at me with a blank expression. “I…hadn’t thought of it. We should celebrate him makin’ it through his freshman year, shouldn’t we?” She flipped open her notebook, her pen poised between her fingers. “I’ll make a list of what we need for a little party. Oh, it’ll have to be after seven. We have a late viewing tomorrow. But that’s okay, we can tell Reed we’re being European—”

“Mama,” I laid my hand over hers, “you can do that, or I’ll take him out. He’s mentioned an arcade he wants to go to. It’s filled with vintage games. I can see if he wants to do that.”

Her eyes fluttered closed. “That would be wonderful, my love. You take such great care of all of us—especially Reed. I’ll make his favorite dinner this weekend when it’s not rushed.”

“Sunday please?” If I knew my brother, he’d want barbecue, and I didn’t want to miss that. “I have a thing with Miles on Saturday.”

Her brow arched. “Miles? I haven’t heard you mention him in a while.”

“Yeah. We’ve both been busy with work lately.” I folded my arms over my stomach, which hadn’t stopped aching since I’d realized Miles had pulled away from me.

Two weeks of twisting organs was a lot to bear, but here I was, still alive and kicking.

Kicking myself, mainly. Wondering what I’d done wrong, where I’d misstepped. We’d become friends. I hadn’t imagined that. The other stuff…the kissing, touching, we could have put that away if he’d wanted to. After our conversation in the car on the way home, I’d assumed as much. Disappointing, but probably wise. By no means did I consider Miles might’ve no longer wanted anything from me.

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