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“I’m the one to blame for why you’re lying in the hospital. Not yours and not your mother’s.” Creases line her forehead. “It’s mine and my dad’s.
She nods, squeezing my hand with barely any strength. “I shouldn’t have let him guilt me into breaking up with you, but part of me knew it wasn’t healthy how we were.”
“So, my dad talked to you? He was the reason you broke it off?”
She gives me a small nod. “Talk. Funny. More like he threatened me. I thought your dad loved me.”
I thought he loved me too.
The machines beep, and Lettie looks scared, so I hop off the bed as the nurse comes in and puts her oxygen back into her nose. She taps on the machine, and it stops making that annoying beeping sound.
Lettie asks, “ Can you tell me what you had to do to me? Was I dead?”
“We would have thought it was a drug overdose, but a lady showed us the pills she gave you. It was a bad interaction between your ADHD medication and the depression medication. We pumped your stomach, so we have you on a saline IV, oxygen, and are monitoring your heart. You were found by your friend, unresponsive in respiratory arrest. The paramedics were able to restart your breathing. Your heart didn’t stop.” She looks at both of us. “Try not to get upset. You’re making progress since you’re awake and alert.”
We shake our heads. How do we not get upset over what has happened?
“Who found me?”
“Brooke. She had been calling you all day. Our friends had seen the footage of election night and knew you would be upset. She finally came over when you didn’t answer for hours.”
“I’ll never be able to repay her.”
“Do you remember the day we did our morning texts, and it felt like there was a chance we would get back together?”
“Yeah.”
“I thought when I told my dad we might get back together that he would be happy that we might have a chance. Instead, he said it was for my own good, and I would never lose you completely. We both had dreams, and he wanted us both to realize those dreams, and I wanted that too. Wanted you to be standing on the Olympic podium one day while they played The Star-Spangled Banner, and you put that gold medal between your teeth. I thought I was being selfless.” I hang my head with dried tears on my face. “Can you forgive me?”
She whispers, “Yes. I thought I was doing the same. I want my life back. But when you said we needed to focus on our goals at Hagan and Adalee’s wedding, it seemed like the end of us. The kiss felt like goodbye.”
“Baby, the kiss was... until tomorrow or whatever length of time until we could be together. If you’ll have me, I want to be your best friend again. I want to be your boyfriend and one day your husband. The father of our kids. And we’ll have everything that matters—a family.”
“Dane…” She pauses with trembling lips and shaky breath.
“Don’t cry. It’s all true. Tell me you want all of that too.”
She struggles to sit up, so I help her and then sit on the bed. As she cries, she chokes on her tears. “I lost our baby.”
My body stills, unsure if I heard her correctly. “What?” I push back to see her face.
“I’m sorry. I lost my best friend, my boyfriend, and our baby.”
My voice trembles, and I narrowly force out words. “Baby? When? How?”
“I was still coming to terms with being pregnant at Hagan and Adalee’s wedding.”
My fingers rub over my five o’clock shadow as it hits me. “So, that was what changed your mind about being together?”
Nodding, she reaches for a tissue, pulls out her oxygen, and blows her nose, then she puts it back in. “I was going to find a way to tell you that I was pregnant, but then you started playing good again. I saw your face everywhere and knew you were doing exactly what I asked—being the Dane who achieves and succeeds. You appeared to be happy, and I didn’t want to be what came between you and your career.”
“You’ve always been more important than basketball. I should have shown you… proven to you. God, I don’t know how you’ll forgive me.” My jaws tremble, and I break down. “I’m so sorry.”
Lettie rubs my hand, and I use her hand to wipe away the salty river streaming down my face. She begins to speak, but her voice is strained and scratchy, so I give her a sip of water.
“Dane, I spiraled, not eating or hydrating. Then I fell off Diamond Mine, and Jasper was so angry I hadn’t been taking my meds. Remember the game I brought my grandparents to?”
“Yeah. You had a bruised elbow.”
