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I can’t believe he’s admitting to killing Aiden’s parents. He then says, “and something irreplaceable to you.” My brows furrow.
“What do you mean?” I have a fleeting thought that Aiden was right in this same situation a few days ago. He won’t talk to me now. What does his dad have to do with my mom?
My eyes widen when confusion turns to realization. I let out an audible gasp. “No, please tell me it wasn’t him.” I’m pleading, begging, hoping. The resignation on his face tells me everything. Tears that I didn’t think I had any more of break free. I’m shaking my head, in shock, repeating, “No… no… no.” If I thought mine and Aiden’s strained relationship couldn’t get any worse, it just did. There is no way back from this.
A hand softly touches my hands on the table. It makes me jump. “Don’t touch me!” I seethe with a chilly voice. “Do you realize that you are the root of my fucked up life? You’re the part that keeps me from having a normal life. You are the poison in me, seeping its way through at every turn. Because of you, I can’t be happy!”
I jerk to my feet, the chair sliding back on the floor making an awful screeching noise, and run out of the visitor’s area. I find the closest bathroom and empty my stomach. After I can’t dry heave anymore, I sit on the toilet and cry. I force myself to get up and glance at myself in the mirror but don’t recognize the person looking back. My face and eyes are puffy and red. My hair is pulled back in a ponytail, with pieces falling out everywhere. Grabbing my sunglasses, I put them on to cover my bloodshot eyes.
Walking out of the jail, I pull out my phone to call Sydney. She’s already called me five times. I know she’s going to be worried. She’s always worried about me. Why does my life have to be so messed up? I can’t even fall in love right.
When I look up from my phone to walk down the few steps to the sidewalk, I notice Aiden leaning against the building at the bottom of the stairs. I stop walking and we stare at each other. He looks horrible. Like he hasn’t slept in days. I know the feeling. His broad chest takes in deep breaths. His hands are in his pockets and his eyes are pinned on mine. Panic flickers in his eyes. I’m thankful mine are behind my sunglasses. We stand there, neither of us taking the first step toward the other. He breaks our connection and looks down.
I want to run to him and tell him it doesn’t matter. It doesn’t matter what his dad did. He’s not his dad, the same thing he told me, but something keeps me frozen in my spot. Tears run down my face. Reality is I’m not sure that it doesn’t matter. He looks up and sees me brush away my tears. He pushes off the wall rushing to me.
“I’m so sorry, Addison.” He grabs me into his muscular embrace and holds me. I can’t believe just days ago our roles were changed, ironically the same story, just slightly different.
Fucking fate!
Chapter Fifty-two
Aiden
I PULL ADDISON to my chest. Her arms wrap around my waist. We stand there with not a slice of air between us. I can’t pull her close enough to release this feeling of emptiness. I knew Travis would tell her. I’m not sure if it was his way of paying me back, but the asshole hurt more than me. He destroyed his own daughter.
After leaving Travis on Tuesday, I needed to get away for a few days. I drove to the beach house to try and clear my head. The only thing I cleared was a couple bottles of Jack. I should’ve talked to Addison, but I couldn’t. How was I supposed to tell her that my dad killed her mom? That the coldhearted killer she saw is part of me. I squeeze my eyes shut. I told her that I didn’t care about Travis, that it didn’t affect the way I felt about her. And I meant every word. I love her and I sure as fuck don’t want to lose her. But how can I ask the same thing from her? Will she ever be able to look at me and not think of my dad? Losing my parents was traumatic, but at least I didn’t watch them die at the hands of Travis.
I came back into town last night. Barely sleeping these past couple of nights, I crashed on my couch last night. I woke up to a call from Trent that Addison was visiting Travis. He’s starting to question things. I told him to back off. I don’t care what happens now to Travis. Ironic, huh? I spent most of my life wanting revenge for the man who took my parents away, and now I’d let him go just to be with his daughter. Life’s a bitch sometimes. I’m starting to agree with Addison about fate. She’s got a sadistic sense of humor.
“Addison, I don’t know what to say,” I finally break the silence. I’m still holding her, afraid if I let her go that she’ll walk away. There’s a stabbing pain in my chest with just the thought. I hate that I can’t fix this, that I have to live with what she decides. I’ve never felt so powerless, hopeless, and broken before. This feeling sucks.
Please say you don’t care.
When she doesn’t say anything, I squeeze her tighter. She’s slipping away from me. “I want you to tell me how I can fix this. I can’t lose you,” I say, my voice choking on my words. She digs her head into my chest and shakes it. The feel of her chest quivering as she silently cries has me wanting to kill someone. I loosen my hold on her, taking my hand under her chin and lifting it so she can face me. I push her sunglasses to the top of her head. With my hands on her face, I brush away her tears with my thumbs. I lean down, putting my forehead against hers. I momentarily close my eyes and a tear escapes. I open my eyes as I feel her hand on my cheek, wiping away my lone tear.
When I look into her eyes, her eyes frantically dart away. “Addison, look at me,” I command softly. She lets out a shaky breath and looks up. “I love you, Addison.” I can feel her pulse quicken under the palm of my hands. She places her hands on top of mine, locking our fingers, pulling them down to our sides.
She looks down at our hands, but quickly looks back up. “Oh, Aiden…” her breath catches “…I love you, too.” My heart races hearing her say that. “But is that enough? How do we move past this? How do we build a life together with this as our foundation?” She hiccups through her tears. Her head falls back, looking to the sky. She lets go of our hands and takes the couple steps to the ground, pacing. She lets out a loud sigh in frustration. “Why can’t anything in my life be fucking easy?” she yells.
I take the few steps to meet her, each one feels like my shoes are full of cement. Even though I understand her hesitation, it stings. I stand frozen in place as she walks back and forth in front of me, my eyes never leaving her. I stuff my hands in my pockets to avoid reaching out and grabbing her. I mutter a curse and she slowly turns around to face me, tilting her head.
“I get it, Addison. I understand this situation sucks. But don’t let our paths be determined by the actions of our fathers. I love you. You are the air that brings life into me.” I take a step closer. “I had one goal in life: revenge. Until I met you. You, Addison. After you left last summer, my desire for revenge was gone. You were always invading my thoughts. And that’s when I thought I’d never see you again.” I take another step forward. “Call it fate, destiny, written in the stars, what the fuck ever… we were given a second chance.” Another step, and I’m standing right in front of her.
She shakes her head and a bitter laugh escapes her lips. “A second chance for what, Aiden? Heartbreak? Closure on our parents’ deaths? We were meant to meet, yes. Were we meant to fall in love? If I hadn’t been kept there for those five days and we met on the street, at a club, wherever, would we still have fallen in love?”
“Fuck, Addison,” I growl and run my hands through my hair, “It didn’t take me five days to fall in love with you! It took me five seconds. When I walked into that room and saw you, I immediately felt my heart surge back to life. I might not have known it that second, but I felt it when you left.” My chest heaves. I turn around. Now it’s my turn to pace as I try to control my anger. I’m angry that she questions my love for her. I’m angrier that I’m questioning her love for me now.
“Aiden,” she hiccups. I turn around to face her. Tears cascade down her face. She wipes them as fast as they fall. She takes a couple deep breaths. “Please don’t doubt my love for you. You weren’t the only one who felt it immediately. But the entire time we’ve been together, I haven’t been able to give you a hundred percent of me. I’ve always had to hold back because of what I knew. What I was hiding.”
“Everything’s out now, Addison.” I throw my hands into the air. “It’s all in your hands now. I don’t know what else to do,” I say in resignation.
“Just give me some time.”
I take a couple steps to her. My hands cup her face. I swipe my thumb against her lower lip. “I’ll give you time. But if you wait too long, I’ll come find you.” I brush my lips against hers and whisper, “I love you” before I smash down on her lips. She opens for me, letting my tongue assault her mouth with frantic need. I feel her hands on my chest, knotting my shirt in a fist. I wrap my hand in her hair, pulling her into me.
As we break the kiss, we’re both breathing heavy. She takes a step back. Those gorgeous eyes that hypnotized me the first time I saw them pin me in place.
“I love you, Aiden.” She softly smiles as she walks around me. I turn in place and watch her walk away. I’ll give her fucking two weeks max. Then I’m going to take what is mine.
