AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Well, I flew out there, and I met him, and he asked to train me right away. It felt as if all of my dreams were coming true, and in being a slave, I was truly leaving the past behind.
“It was him who sent me to self-defense classes so I could compete in the primal games there, although it was nothing like they are at the Primal Ranch. But then, nothing is.”
“What did you mean just now about leaving the past behind?” my Master asks, surprising me.
“Oh, I…I wanted to forget. I needed to. It was the only way…the only way I could…survive.”
The last word comes out on such a sharp sob, I can barely breathe for several moments. And as he usually does, Master Erek strokes his finger over my cheek, then sucks my tears into his beautiful mouth. And I’m so torn between grief and longing, rage and desire, I don’t know what to do with myself. Not in this space that was not slavespace. But what is it? I can’t figure it out.
He offers me the white handkerchief and allows me to sit quietly until I’m able to get the tears under control.
“You’ve had a very difficult life,” he says.
“I suppose. But maybe not any harder than anyone else’s.”
“No. My dear Mina, you have had an extraordinarily difficult life. What good does it do you to deny it? Or is it simply part of being a slave, that you automatically put everyone else before yourself?”
That makes me angry, and I’m not sure why. I respond without choosing my words.
“Why would you say that? I’m a slave, not a doormat. My life is what I chose. No one has forced me to sign my contracts. I am no one’s victim!”
God, did I just yell at my Master? But the rage is still simmering hard, ready to boil over.
“Yes, this is what I needed to see,” he says, as if I haven’t just behaved in the most reprehensible manner. “I needed to see you. You have fight in you, Girl. And it’s what we need.”
His blue gaze burns into me, as if he’s searching, exploring me from the inside. And the anger fades, one devastatingly sharp spike at a time. The tears fall again. But they’re gentle this time.
He pulls me close and licks my cheek, then whispers in my ear, “This is why you are so good for us. You have real depth. You are a nearly perfect slave, and your imperfections, if that’s what some might think of them, are what make you so flawless, Mina. Your grief and pain are so deeply tied to your every act of service and submission. To the way you bear the terrible things we do to you. It’s why we are both falling so in love with you, in a way neither of us ever have before. Well… to be fair, my love Séverin has. But never with a woman. And here you come into this game we thought we were playing, here at the Bambi Hunt, and turn our lives upside down in the most exquisite way.”
I don’t know what’s happening. It’s as confusing as when I was abducted from the Training House. There is as much doubt about my safety and well-being, but in an entirely different way. The fear is that my life is about to change. But the fear is mixed with a sort of hope that shines too brightly to see beyond, a future full of the unknown, which is honestly my worst nightmare. Even being handed from Mistress to Master, being sent to the Primal Ranch, the new and evil punishments someone is always creating for me, I always know what to count on. I know what I signed up for. There is a certainty to the mystery of what lies ahead, always, knowing I can count on some very specific things. I will always be a slave. I will be tortured and abused by people who know what they’re doing. I will also be cared for. It’s all in the contracts. And I can count on not being truly emotionally invested in any way other than that love and adoration I have for anyone who hurts me.
But this is something different.
I don’t even know what the hell I’m thinking right now. I can’t make sense out of what he’s saying—implying—and the emotions roll through me in such rapid succession, I don’t have time to separate it all out.
He pulls back and takes my face in his hand. “Mina. I understand this is a lot to process. It is for me even as I’m saying these things. I’m trying to figure it all out myself, so I’m sure it’s confusing for you. I’m sure you have questions.”
I shake my head. “I wouldn’t know where to start. I’m not sure what’s going on here,” I admit. I hang my head and murmur, “It would be so much easier if you would just take this shirt off me, force me to my knees, and beat me.”
He takes my chin and searches my gaze to his. “Easy isn’t always the best way.”
I don’t say anything. But I suspect he might be right.
“Why don’t I tell you our story, as a way to allow you to get to know us? Then what I’m trying to get at may make more sense.”
“Yes, please, Master.”
He lets my chin go and sits back. “So. Séverin and I met six years ago. He was forty-four, I was only thirty-two, which seems like a young lad to me now. We became attached immediately. Over time we took slaves together, only Boys at first. It took me a good year to find out why he never would touch a female slave. But over time that changed. He still won’t fuck a woman other than in her ass, although I feel that may change soon with you. He has his reasons.”
“Béatrice?” I ask, then immediately wish I hadn’t. It seems too sensitive a subject to be discussed behind his back.
“Yes,” Master Erek answers. “Partly. But he’s always identified as purely gay, and only in recent years as homoflexible. He’s learned to enjoy the female slaves I’ve brought him. He’s softened a bit with me. Or perhaps for me. And although this isn’t exactly related—or maybe it is; I’ll let you decide—I want to tell you, he was studying theology when his sister died in an accident. He was at Oxford. He thought he wanted to be a priest in those years. But then his dear Béatrice died so suddenly, at the age of seventeen, and he lost all faith. But as so many ex-Catholics do, I think he carries a heavy weight of guilt with him. And then, years later, he had a slave named Andreas. A beautiful Boy who, I believe, he was deeply in love with. He died of cancer fifteen years ago. And so, you see, he never wanted to love another slave. In fact, he stepped back from kink entirely for a very long time. But then, we met. And when we did, I was a slave. I belonged to a Master he knew in Berlin. I was loaned out to Séverin, and he bought my contract right away. He had me top other Boys for his entertainment, which is when we both discovered what a sadist I am at heart. And at the end of that year, he emancipated me. We’ve been together ever since.”
“It’s so sad. Not you two being together, but all of his loss. I’ve felt it.”
“I don’t think you can spend any amount of time with him and not feel his grief. But despite how we started, despite the weight of his sadness, I fell in love with him. So deeply. My love is almost driven by his sadness.”
“As is mine,” I say, my eyes damp with tears.
