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“Did you not want a mate?”
It seems like a sensible question to me. After all, he clearly doesn’t like having me in their house. And he didn’t choose this.
Or me.
But he’s so obviously thrown by my question that it’s almost funny. He opens his mouth and shuts it twice before finally admitting, “No. I didn’t.”
With a nod, I sink lower. “I get that.”
Odd, disbelieving silence stretches over us. Blond brows crunch over those dark, endless eyes. “You… do?”
I snort, accidentally blowing bubbles into my own face. “Yeah,” I mumble, wiping at my nose. “Don’t get me wrong—a pack of big, strong alphas to save me was my dream for a long time, but once I actually met some alphas… No offense, but they were overwhelmingly horrible. The idea of being saddled to a bunch for all eternity because they liked the way I smelled was my worst nightmare.”
My lips twist in a rueful smirk as I turn back to him. “Joke’s on me, huh?”
Here I am, thinking I’m being blasé and maybe a tiny bit charming—but Spencer stares at me so intensely, I swear the flesh on my face melts a little. He has a way of looking right through people that’s so unnerving.
I shrink back a little, and his jaw clenches. But his voice is even. “It must have been difficult. Having someone you trusted turn on you like that.”
It’s a strained attempt at empathy. Unnatural for him, I think. But he’s trying. So I feel like I sort of have to answer.
I lean my head back along the edge of the tub and stare up at the patterns glowing overhead, echoes of the candles flickering on the counter. “The hardest part has been trying to forgive myself for how stupid I was. Accepting that I was so clueless for so long.”
Spencer makes a low humming sound and dips a washcloth into the water. He hovers over my arm for a long moment before blowing out a breath and running it over my skin, his eyes snapping back to mine. “How did you finally figure out you were trapped?”
I cringe lower, feeling a pang of embarrassment for the first time since waking up here. I want to lie, but it’s impossible with him staring into me like that.
“There was a storm one day,” I whisper, dropping my gaze to the bubbles. “When I was a girl, I—playing outside in the rain was one of my favorite things. And, one day, I tried to remember the last time I’d felt the rain on my skin, but I couldn’t. So, I tried to leave the club, to go outside. For the rain. And I wasn’t allowed to.”
Spencer’s mind doesn’t work like the others. Instead of crumpling in pity, his face stays smooth while he processes. And then he says, “I smell like rain.”
Why does this uptight, intimidating alpha saying all the wrong things make me want to smile? I bite my lower lip and hum, “Mmhmm. You sure do.”
His brows drop again, furrowing while he ponders that and glides the washcloth up to my shoulder. “Was he planning something else for you, if you hadn’t gotten away?”
I’m grateful the bath covers the way shame swirls into my scent.
“I think he originally planned to—” I turn my face away. “Lend me out. Or have me dance. But then my designation came in, and once the hormones hit… I don’t know what happened, but my perfume made them all rabid.”
Spencer shifts, clearly uncomfortable but listening closely.
“Wally decided he could make more off me if he used me for enticement instead of letting other alphas sully my scent. So, every night, I had to walk around in the skimpiest outfits he could find, serving drinks and letting alphas paw at me while I passed.”
The man next to me stifles a growl, letting me finish. “I did that for a long time. Then, I found out that he had big plans for my twenty-fifth birthday.”
For some reason, I feel the need to turn back and look at him as I finish, “An auction.”
Spencer is quick. It takes him less than a second to understand. “For you,” he realizes. “He was going to let packs bid on you?”
My head falls back while my eyes slide shut. I nod, feeling oddly hollow. “During my next heat, so I wouldn’t put up a fight. I guess he thought I was getting too old.”
Like I said—I can sniff out an angry alpha from a mile away. Traditionally, those were the ones who wanted to hurt me. Of course, none of them were allowed to—other than Wally.
But he isn’t here now. And a shiver skirts down my spine as Spencer’s scent darkens.
His voice sounds jagged. “These scars… Did they all come from him?”
I laugh, but it’s a bleak sound. “No. He wanted me to be pretty, so he mostly kept his hands off me. Except for the times I tried to get away and he had to teach me a lesson. A few of the scars are from that. But most of them are my own fault.”
