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“Can we sit down?” I asked when her constant back and forth had made me feel even more anxious.
“No, moving about helps me think,” she replied, rejecting my request and continued to use this pattern of comfort to calm herself.
“You have no idea how hard that was sitting there,” she offered, and I nodded.
“I’m so sorry, baby. I can’t imagine it from your perspective, but if its any consolation to you, I hated that you chose to sit there with her like that.”
“I bet. Especially when I had to listen to how incredible your body is and how amazing you were in bed… and how she has never been able to get that night out of her mind.”
“Fuck, I’m…” I shrugged; my chest tightened to the point where catching a breath had felt painful. “Sorry isn’t enough… I know it isn’t. But I am. You know how I feel about you, Daisy. That was the old me, not the man standing here before you.”
“I know, but I saw her, heard what she had to say about you… hell, I’ve felt every feeling she explained to me in infinite detail. It makes me wonder how many women there are out there like her.”
“You’re the only woman I care about.”
“Yeah, but the way she spoke about you, seeing that dreamy look in her eyes…” her voice trailed off.
Stepping closer, I took her by her hands, and when she didn’t resist my touch, I gently led her toward the couch.
“Sit. Let me talk,” I said sternly, because I knew what I said then was either going to make us alright or crush what we were. “That girl knew what the deal was when she got with me. Believe me, I’ve never had to go looking for women in my past. I know that sounds arrogant, but I want you to know you are the only girl I’ve ever worked for. With her and others like her, it was always sex for sport, not the genuine chemistry we have, nothing like it.”
Daisy’s hurt eyes searched my face and my heart sank to my stomach seeing how upset she was.
“I knew who you were before, I’d seen the press reports and gossip columns I used to eat up, but when I’m on the other side of that now…” she trailed off
“I hate to say this, but there’s more than one like her out there. But get this, they came on to me. They knew what they were getting into and I gave them what they wanted. If that makes me sound like a pig, then I own that. I was. But that is not who I am now.”
“I know, I knew you weren’t a saint, it’s just…” she shrugged, helpless.
Placing my hand on her head I pulled her toward me and kissed her temple. “It’s hard. I get it, and I’d love to hope what happened won’t ever happen again, but I need to be honest and say I can’t be sure of that, not if you hang around when I play gigs anyway. She was a pure stroke of bad luck today. What you can be one hundred percent sure of is that there will never be another one of those I take to my bed going forward.”
“I believe you, but it doesn’t mean it still doesn’t hurt.”
“I know. I have no idea how you sat down with that girl knowing I’d been with her.”
“Tsk, it’s not the first time I’ve met an old flame of a boyfriend. I’m not going to pretend that’s easy either, but I’ve never met a girl that wanted to go into intimate detail about what my boyfriend did to her and how special that made her feel.”
My heart sank to my stomach and how devastated she looked, her sad expression and hurt filled eyes almost demolished me.
“Shit.” I blurted, as I sat blinking, unable to find the words to make that go away. Daisy could never unhear that. Sorry didn’t cut it. “Forgive me,” I finally said, when I felt the silence between us had gone on too long.
“What for? You didn’t intentionally set out to hurt me,” she said, quickly.
“No, but I can see my past action has, all the same,” I replied.
“That’s not technically true. She did, unwittingly of course, because we somehow convinced her you were my Canadian boyfriend Barney, thanks to that stupid Canadian accent you throw out there every now and again.”
We both chuckled and I held her head between the palms of my hands and fell serious. “I truly am sorry, Daisy, you know I—”
When she placed her fingertips over my mouth I closed my lips and kissed them.
“Shit happens right? Afterward, we decide whether to clean it up or let it stink the place out. We’re not going to let this ruin what we have,” she stated, and I felt the tight band that had formed around my chest instantly slacken. Daisy was no doormat, but she was pragmatic— another trait I loved about her.
“Right, where’s the mop and bucket,” I replied, a little flighty with my words, but it drew a small smile from her lips. “You’re too good to me,” I whispered, kissing her forehead. I pulled back to look at her, I stared lovingly into her eyes. “I thank God for you every day, Daisy O’Donnell and I thank my lucky stars for the day that I met you.”
Chapter 14
“Anyone home? Daisy, are you and my uncle bumping uglies or can I come up?” Ryan interrupted our tender moment when he called out from the bottom of the stairs.
