AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“Honestly, it’s not like that,” she said, a half-hearted chuckle escaping her throat, like it was a joke to her, but I’d seen how he hung on her every move and I scowled.
“Maybe not for you, baby, but a man knows…” I said, taking a measured breath when I felt my blood heat inside. “I saw how he looked at you and that guy is a heartbeat away from pinning you onto your back.”
“Where do I go? Am I moving in here with you?” she asked, her mind working faster than I’d had time to answer. After considering her questions I reluctantly shook my head.
“However tempted I am to have you here with me, no. I need you to be sure about us, and the way I feel about you right at this minute, I’d fuck you six ways from Sunday. Baby, you have no idea how much I want to do that, but I’m not going to. Instead of that, I’m going to need your help to restrain me from caving to that particular craving.”
Disappointment etched her face, and even though my body buzzed with want, I knew I had a second chance to create something worthwhile. I saw a fighting chance to finally get things right between us, but she had to know I was never going to allow her to make me feel the way she had before.
Tricia stared at me with unasked questions floating through her mind, her face changing and morphing into frowns, biting her lips, pursing them, and finally holding them in a line as if to bite them back. She deserved a reason for my lack of enthusiasm to do all I desired to do to her.
“I’m not going to scratch an itch in one moment of weakness only to find you’ve turned cold on me again. I was being honest with you when I said I want more from any woman I give myself to going forward, so I need to be sure what’s going on here isn’t going to be another one-hit wonder.”
“It’s not. But I’m scared. Now that I’m here, I don’t want to ruin this opportunity any more than you do,” she replied quickly. My eyes searched hers, looking for the truth, and I wanted more than anything to believe her.
“Look, I think we both know our emotions are all over the place. So, I suggest we take whatever this is, slowly. As much as I want to, I’m not settling for less than a serious attempt to create something more than a quick fling, so I need to be sure.”
“I want this to work too,” she replied, quickly. The desperation in her tone gave me hope. “I’ll say it again, James, I’m not the person you think I am… I know my behavior was inexcusable, and I hate the person I sometimes am. Being on my own was a choice I made a long time ago, but I don’t think I can do that now that I have feelings for you.” An ache settled in my chest when I saw how her face paled and dimness shadowed her normally sparkling eyes.
“You’re not a bad person, Tricia, but you’re a fucking complicated mystery, baby. You’re beautiful, smart and…” I sighed, exasperated, “what the fuck has happened to you that’s made you think you have to protect yourself by being alone?”
When she held her breath, the air between us thickened again and for a moment, I had thought she was going to drop some dynamite revelation that would have made everything about her fall into place. A range of emotions flitted over face as she bit her lip, averting her gaze and how reluctant she was to look me in the eye.
A disclosure hung in the air, and I’d have bet my life on it she had something profound to say. For a split second, I thought she was going to, but she steeled herself and just like that it was gone. Whatever it was, I felt it deep—like it was a delicate subject. Instinctively I didn’t push the matter further. It was another layer of the skin on the onion I knew I’d have to unpeel, to find the key to the bizarre reason she’d chosen to live her life in the way she had.
“Baby, we all have flaws and believe me, if we do commit to giving this a try, I don’t think there is anything you could say that would make me walk away. We’ve all got things we aren’t proud of or things we’re not proud we’ve done. Have you forgotten you’re talking to the guy who fucked his brother’s live-in girlfriend?”
Perhaps I expected her to wince at my frank admission, but she already knew the score with that. My eyes softened, glad she had heard me out, and I took the sides of her head in my hands. Immediately our eyes locked in a serious stare and we held it for a few moments until I frowned when I saw worry flit through hers and I spoke again.
“What gives me the right to judge you?” I could see she wasn’t convinced, and as if my searching her eyes would reveal her truth, she turned out of my hold and walked away. I let her because I believed since we had finally gotten on the same page there would be plenty of time to know how she ticked.
As painful as it felt, I remained true to my conviction to let her go. Stepping behind her, I held her by her shoulders and guided her toward the elevator. “Okay, do you need help to move your possessions from Bradley’s room?”
Glancing up at me her jaw dropped. “Can’t I at least have some time to talk to him about this before I go packing my shit up and moving somewhere else?”
I scowled, and I saw her eyes flare in surprise. I figured she had thought me unreasonable in my demand and asked, “Whose idea was it to share a room?”
Tricia frowned. “Does that matter?” She must have seen anger from the way I silently ground my teeth, my jawline set and I huffed out a frustrated breath. “It was Bradley’s… but I went along with it,” she added quickly, her hands waving weakly. “I genuinely thought it was a good idea. It works for us.”
“Worked. Past tense. It worked for him. It doesn’t work for me, so you’re moving out. Do you want Rhea to help move your luggage?”
“No.” She stared me down for a few seconds, and when she saw my position was never going to change, she sighed. “Fine. I’m moving. I don’t need Rhea, I can manage, I just think—”
“Share a room with Bradley or share time with me—one choice, Tricia, what’s it to be?”
Gazing into my eyes I saw the moment her decision was final. Patting my chest softly, she shook her head and shrugged. “Fine. I’ll move… I’ll move.” Her tone made her sound a little pissed at being put on the spot. “Where am I moving to?” she asked, arms spread wide to the sides.
“Anywhere he isn’t. A different floor would be a good start. I’ll arrange a new suite and have the front desk bring you a key card.”
“Jeez, you really are jealous, aren’t you?”
“Astute, I prefer the word astute. If life has taught me anything, Tricia, it is to always protect what’s mine,” I said, folding my arms across my chest to press my point to her.
“Yours? Is that how you see me?” she asked. Her expression flitted between delight and fright, her uncertainty noted by the disbelief in her tone.
“Not yet, but that would be my eventual intention, unless you’ve changed your mind. But you can’t begin to fill that spot yet, not while your possessions are still lying in some other guy’s room. Once we remedy that I’ll feel much happier about working toward putting a label on us.”
“Will you call me, later?”
“Of course, when you’ve decanted from lover boy’s room.”
“Stop calling him that, he’s a friend—”
I held my hand up to silence her and smirked. “Dinner 8:00 p.m. in the restaurant, I have a reservation for two in my name.”
“You already planned to have dinner with me?”
The elevator car arrived, and Tricia stepped inside, turned, and looked out at me. “Hardly, I would never be that presumptuous, but I’m sure Rhea won’t mind eating somewhere else… with Bradley, perhaps?” I replied, sounding childish and grinning. Tricia’s hand flew to her mouth, but it wasn’t in shock. Although I couldn’t see the smile she wore, it shone in her gorgeous green eyes. “8:00 p.m. Don’t let me down.” The elevator doors closed before she could reply, and I chuckled at that because I hadn’t missed the huge breath she’d inhaled as she had prepared to shoot something back.
