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Leaving the door open wide I strode away and headed back toward Juliette, my head down, thumbs already engaging the Uber app on my cell phone keypad. From how I ached inside, I knew there were still strong feelings there. Taking a stand had been a tough, but I had to do what I felt was right for myself and my girl, Juliette.
* * *
As I walked away, a pain grew in my chest because no matter how much I loved Juliette, no one else had ever made me feel the sexual chemistry I had with Tricia. Chemistry that had been strong enough to paralyze me when I saw her again. Even as I denied my feelings, there was a small part of me that knew, had I not been with Juliette, and we’d met under different circumstances, I’d have ended up in her bed.
That thought sat on my chest like a heavy boulder, my heart didn’t want it, but it felt too suffocating to be ignored either.
Both Sawyer and Hammer were talking with Juliette when I made it back to my seat. “The Uber is ten minutes out, sweetheart,” I said somewhat abruptly, interrupting their flow of conversation and gaining the eyes of Sawyer and his friend immediately on me. Sawyer raised a brow, but I ignored his silent question. “Do you want me to grab your jacket?” I asked and turned my focus on my girl.
“I’ll get it,” Hammer offered and stood, pulling the waistband of his jeans back into place.
“Let me come with you,” Juliette offered. “I need to visit the powder room before the car comes.” Smiling, she shook her head and gave us a small chuckle. “All that beer… I don’t want an accident on the way home,” she joked. As she began to walk, Hammer stepped into line with her and they strolled back toward the house.
“Did I see what I thought I did a few minutes ago?” my brother snapped. His tone was cutting.
“What would that be?” I asked, scowling at Sawyer.
“Tricia and you in the bathroom?”
My mind instantly raked over the coals at the heart of the one thing I knew I could never take back as far as we were concerned. Did a part of him still doubt me about what happened with Charlotte?
“It wasn’t what you think…”
“No? You weren’t both in the bathroom for almost five minutes together?”
“You want to go there?” I snapped. When he didn’t reply but held my weighted stare, I shook my head. “Leave it alone, Sawyer.”
“Leave, what? What are you doing? I’ve just spent the past five minutes covering for you with your girl.”
“Covering for me? Did I asked you to do that? You think I somehow planned what happened back there?” I challenged, throwing my index finger toward the house, and making a few of the guests closest to us stop talking.
“I took a piss and Tricia hijacked me, if I’d fucked her we’d still be in there.”
“It would appear you have a habit of being hijacked by women,” Sawyer growled quietly.
“Are you fucking with me?” My voice was loud that time and there was no mistake we were engaged in an argument. Rage shot through my veins because my previous suspicion had been confirmed, and it was a low blow after all the work it had taken for us to find our feet as brothers.
Sawyer stood and shifted from foot to foot, clearly uncomfortable with me biting back. It had been a long time since we’d gone head-to-head about anything.
“Since you still have an obvious mistrust of me, I’ll tell you what happened. I’d say she hit on me, but she didn’t … well, not exactly. Tricia sought me out in the bathroom, and if I’d been a willing participant, sure, she’d have let me fuck her. When I turned her down, she tried to mindfuck me instead. I didn’t bite and told her to go fuck herself, but not in so many words because I’m a gentleman—happy now?” I glanced toward the house but there was no sign of my girl nor Hammer. “We’re leaving as soon as the Uber arrives, but let me tell you, Sawyer, with that mistrustful remark you just made, this conversation is far from done.”
My cell vibrated in my jeans back pocket and I broke the pointed stare that had grown between us to look at it. “Car’s here,” I said without looking up at him, and without saying goodbye, I headed toward the house. Thankfully, he never followed me because the way he’d made me feel, and the hormonal surges I’d had from my frustrations, had left me all but spoiling for the kind of physical contact I excelled at.
Billie and Juliette were chatting in the kitchen when I reached it. “Uber’s here, sweetheart,” I told my girl, grabbing her hand. I kissed her temple and turned to look at my brother’s wife. I forced a smile. “See you in the morning, Billie,” I told her, too pissed off to endure another round of sentimental goodbyes. Besides, I was sure both she and my brother would have a long conversation about the day’s events once they’d turned in for the night.
We walked the short distance down Hammer’s driveway to the Uber waiting by the sidewalk in silence, and once Juliette had been situated in the back seat of the ride, I ran around the trunk and climbed in beside her. After a brief exchange with the driver to confirm our destination, Juliette slid her hand into mine and squeezed.
“Right, out with it. What the fuck is the deal with that woman, Tricia?”
“Tricia?” I asked, sounding more alarmed than surprised by her blunt question that gave me no time to think.
“Don’t tell me she’s nothing, James. The looks that passed between you all day have been eating me up inside.
“There’s nothing between us.”
“I don’t believe that for a second. It may not be something current, but there was plenty going on for you both back there in that yard. The way your eyes pierced hers when you spoke with her… I saw that angst-filled look that past between you. One minute you were wandering across to those drinks coolers, like you didn’t have a care in the world, and from moment you saw her, you had no idea what do to with yourself. The self-assured man I know was nowhere in sight, replaced by a man on edge, reacting anxiously one minute and mesmerized at being there with her the next.”
Regret squeezed my heart and I shrugged, unsure how to respond to her because I had felt all of those things, so instead I slid my palm around in our hands and laced her fingers in mine. I drew in a deep breath, held it a second or two, and then I sighed. It sounded like defeat.
