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Then suddenly his shoulders slumped, and he leaned his forehead against the glass.
“I’m sorry. I’m sorry, baby. I was wrong for trying to make you do things before and I guess I’m still making the same mistake. You want someone who will take care of you and give you what you need. Someone who would be able to see the difference in a sub and a Little.” He whirled around and stared at me, his eyes reddened with emotion. “I never took the time to find out what you needed. What kind of Dom does that make me? I failed you, baby. I never even gave you a choice.”
“No,” I cried out, jumping to my feet. “I should have had the courage to tell you. To say what I needed. I know you’re not a mind reader. It was my fault, and never yours. I should have said I needed a Daddy.”
He came over to stand in front of me. “Listen to me. If anyone is going to be your Daddy, it’s going to be me. I don’t think I could stand the idea of someone else taking care of you. I have a lot to learn—I realize that. But I want to do this for you. If you’ll have me.”
“But-but you’d be miserable.”
“Who said I would? I’d still be in the club on other nights, if I got the urge to be a different kind of Dom. Not to make love to anyone else. That’s only for you. But to use the flogger or the cane on willing subs. A lot of people have relationships that don’t include sex. There’s no reason I can’t.”
“The last time I saw you doing that, I didn’t react well.”
“I know, baby. We both have to make adjustments. But we can take things slowly. A relationship between a Dom and a sub can be completely non-sexual. Doms aren’t boyfriends.”
“I know. In my brain—but in my heart, I guess I don’t want to see you with anyone else.”
“I think we can make this work, if we both try. I want to give you what you need.”
“Being a Little isn’t about sex, you know. Though I still want to make love to you.”
“I do know that much. It’s about caring for you and seeing to your needs while you’re in Little headspace. There’s no one better for that job than me. We can go to the Littles Room at the club or do it at home or both. Whatever you need. I’d like it if you still wore my collar. As a symbol of commitment and to show what we are to each other, but it’s up to you.”
I touched the collar around my neck and smiled. “I’d love that. I don’t need a collar to feel owned, but I consider myself to be yours when I wear it.”
“I love you, Cruz. I don’t know if I’ve told you that lately, but it’s true. One thing though…”
“What’s that?”
“You scared the hell out of me last night and again today. You need discipline for that.”
He held up a hand as I started to protest. “You were a bad boy, and you know it. I know you don’t want pain, so I’ll have to think of something else. That will be at my discretion—agreed?”
“Um, yes, I guess so.”
“Excuse me?”
“Yes, Daddy.”
“Better. Now come over here and apologize for scaring me half to death and for drinking my bourbon without permission and for running away from me. Sit here in my lap and tell me how sorry you are and make me believe it.”
“Yes, Daddy,” I said, blushing a little. “Anything you say.”
He smiled at me. “Good. I think I like this side of you already.”
****
Michael
I did as I’d promised, and the next day after we returned to my condo, I went to see Jerry, my manager. I’d thought I’d known about Jerry. That he was some kind of submissive, though we’d never discussed it. It wasn’t my business, after all. To learn he was a Little was surprising, but to each his own. I could see that his job had stressors that he might need relief from, and I’d been really impressed with Master Lawrence when I’d talked to him. He’d been a good friend to Cruz, too, and that really earned my gratitude and respect.
We talked a long time after Jerry called Lawrence in to talk to me. Jerry had politely stepped out when Lawrence came in to give us privacy.
Lawrence got right to the point. “I think it would be a good idea to come observe other Daddies in the Little Room a few times. Daddies don’t do anything out of the ordinary. We’re just there to support our boys and see to their needs. Whatever those might be.”
“I can do that.”
“I have no doubt you can. It’s a bit like aftercare for subs, in a way. You have to know your boy well and know what they like and need. You have to be attentive. Some need more than others, but all of them need their person to be there with them, looking out for them while they’re vulnerable.”
