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She lifted her head. “You’re not? But the other night—”
“The other night, I was mad at myself for not coming to your rescue. I felt like a horrible boyfriend.”
Her cheeks reddened as she looked away.
“Oh, I guess we didn’t define anything, but I’m pretty sure—”
“No, it’s the perfect term. But what about the kissing?”
Now his cheeks heated up. “What about it?”
“You said it was awful.”
“It kind of was... but that’s not your fault. I’m sure you did... your best.”
“I think I jumped to conclusions. Someone ready to break up with me wouldn’t go through the trouble of making homemade soup.”
“Definitely not.” He grinned and took her hand across the desk, then realized they were at work and let go. “Should we go to our spot?”
Her face lit up, and her cheery disposition returned. “That would be great.”
They gathered their things, and he produced their treat on their walk to their picnic spot. It was a loaf of banana bread he had made the night before with all of his extra time.
“I didn’t realize you cooked so much.”
He shrugged. “Not as much as you, but you’ve inspired me to use my kitchen more. I was spoiled when we were together.”
“Those were fun times. How is everything at your house?”
“Like I got a free remodel. I finally heard back from the city, and they’re processing my paperwork. Thankfully, everyone’s been really good to work with.”
“That’s good.” She sat down by the fountain wall and leaned against it. So, what did you want to talk about if you didn’t want to break up with me?”
“I still can’t believe you’d think I’d give up on us so easily. It took me forever to be brave enough to realize my feelings. I’m not going to give you up easily.” He took her hand and ran a thumb over her skin, marveling at how soft it was. “I’m ready to step it up a notch in overcoming my aversion to touch. I know I might never fully recover, but I know in time, or at least I believe with practice, I can stop flinching when someone accidentally touches me. Or when I’m supposed to be greeting people at work, I want to shake hands with others and not have to second-guess or force myself to go through with it.”
“That makes sense. I think I can help.”
He blew out a slow breath. “But there’s more. I know that you’re a seeker.”
“I am.”
“And that it’s probably not always easy to hold back. I want you to know I’m crazy about you, and just like you’ve been my safe haven, my only exception, I want to fulfill your needs too. So I want to... practice kissing too.”
She hid a smile behind her water bottle. “I see. Well, I think I can help there too. Never fear, I am here. How about after work today, I’ll pick you up. I have a new idea to help you overcome your touch issues.”
He worried his lip. He knew she would be on top of it, but hopefully he wouldn’t regret how proactive she was. An image of the man in the theater assaulting her filled his mind. He shook his head and pushed his negative thoughts away. No, he had to make it work. Whatever it was, he was all in.
18
Hannah
Jason looked around as Hannah pulled up to the dog park. “Don’t we need to pick up Ginger and Snaps?”
“I told Jack and Annie I would take the dogs out tomorrow. We need our hands free for tonight.”
He swallowed hard. “I see.”
Grabbing the door handle, she nodded. “This is going to be a crucial step in your experimental journey, but let me know if it’s too much. At any time, we can leave or stop.”
