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HER
Ican feel his eyes on me every time I leave home.
It’s a strange feeling, like a weight on my back. I haven’t seen him since that night, but I know he’s always there, watching me. It’s made me uneasy, and I have avoided going out much lately. Especially alone. I haven’t even exercised properly for weeks now.
I’ve started having nightmares, too—nightmares of that man, looming over me while I lay defenseless in my bed. He’s always smiling, the mask he wears twisting into a hideous grin like he knows something I don’t. I can feel his breath on my face, smell his sweat. I try to scream, but no sound comes out. Then I wake up in a cold sweat, my heart pounding.
The lack of quality rest has been affecting my work, making it difficult to concentrate. Sometimes, I feel like I’m losing my grip on reality. I am always on edge because of my paranoia, constantly fearing that someone is watching me and waiting to strike.
My friends have noticed my change in behavior and have been trying to get me out of the apartment more. I rarely accept their invitations, and I feel guilty about it. Blake has kept me company, at least. But despite his reassuring presence, fear still lingers in the back of my mind.
This week, Jen had decided that enough was enough.
She lectured me about not staying cooped up forever and insisted on dragging me to the county fair. I initially protested, but eventually gave in. She gave me a ride to the fairgrounds, and now I find myself among the bustling crowd, waiting in line. My palm sweats as I grip the taser hidden in the front pocket of my hoodie.
Apprehension is building inside of me, but I try to focus on the moment. I take a deep breath and listen to the music blaring from the rides, the shouts of vendors, and catch a whiff of fried food. I close my eyes and attempt to will the worry to slide away. Suddenly, I hear a voice beside me that nearly causes me to jump out of my skin.
“Hey, guys! Didn’t expect to see you two out here tonight!”
I smile nervously, feeling my heart race. It’s Nick, all lopsided grins and exuberance wearing a baseball cap.
“Hey, Nick,” Jen greets, her eyes brightening as she takes in his presence. “What are you doing here? If I would’ve known you wanted to come too, I’d have given you a ride.”
Nick scratches behind his ear. “Actually, I came here with Zoey. She’s around, just paying a visit to the girls’ room.” He notices Jen’s expression wilt, and he quickly adds, “But I really appreciate the offer, Jen.”
Awkward. Their back-and-forths are seriously beginning to stress me out. Ugh, I could use a cigarette right about now.
“Yo, go to the back of the fucking line!” someone shouts.
Nick rolls his eyes. “Guess it’s time for me to split. Have fun, guys!”
She nods, offering a tight-lipped smile before he departs. I can see the disappointment in her eyes as she averts her gaze away from him and back to me. “It’s almost our turn,” she says as we approach the ticket booth. “I’ll pay for yours, don’t worry.”
Realizing that arguing with her about it is a losing battle, I stay silent and allow her to purchase two admission tickets. As we officially enter the fairgrounds, it feels like stepping into an entirely different world. The lights from the carnival games and rides glitter like fireflies against the night sky, and the smell of popcorn and cotton candy wafts through the air. It’s a far cry from the quiet apartment I’ve been holed up in for weeks.
I try to steel myself and follow Jen through the crowd. A cacophony of sounds assaults my ears, from the laughter of children to the clatter of game tokens. Struggling to keep up with her, she thankfully latches onto my arm and leads me further into the fairgrounds. I clench my jaw, reminding myself that I’m here with Jen and she won’t let anything happen to me. I can do this.
We start by trying our luck at some of the carnival games. She’s surprisingly brilliant at them, particularly milk bottle knockdown and ring toss. After winning five games in a row, she’s claimed a prize of two stuffed animals—a goofy-looking monkey with a crooked ear and a purple elephant. I’m happy for her. But also slightly embarrassed; I’ve never been good at these games. My father always won and then gave me his loot.
Jen holds her stuffed buddies in the crook of her arm as we wander around, contemplating what to do next. We come across a sign for a fortuneteller’s booth, and she stops in her tracks. “Let’s do it!” she says, her eyes twinkling with excitement.
I shake my head. Jen is interested in the metaphysical, but it’s hard for me to believe in something I can’t see or touch. “Isn’t this stuff a bit … I don’t know. Silly?”
“Maybe. But it can’t hurt to try. And at least it’ll be fun. Come on,please?” She feigns a pout.
Even though I have doubts about the authenticity of this, her excitement is contagious, and I reluctantly give in. She grins and takes my hand, pulling me towards the booth. We join the line with the other curious customers, waiting for our turn.
It feels like we’ve been standing in line forever when Blake appears beside me, his usual effortless smile in place. “Hey there!” he says, gesturing towards the booth with a raised brow. “I didn’t know you were into all this stuff, Mia.”
I shrug, my cheeks flushing a little. “Jen’s pretty into it. I’m just going along for the ride.”
She turns around, grinning shyly at him. “Want to come, too? We can get our fortunes read together. Maybe dig up some deep, dark secrets or something?”
Blake laughs, but there’s something a bit strained about it. Before he can respond, the line moves forward toward the tent. Doubt creeps back in, and I shift awkwardly from foot to foot. He glances at me and we make eye contact, but neither of us says anything. I tear my gaze away, my eyes lingering on the bright colors of the embroidered canopy.
The line moves once more. And soon enough, we find ourselves at the entrance of the tent. Blake and I share a nervous smile, and I hesitate to go in as Jen steps inside. Neither of us moves.
She briefly pauses, glancing over her shoulder at us. “Are you guys coming?”
