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She could kill him for making her fall in love with him again, for causing the incessant ache gripping her heart until she could barely breathe.
Her temper simmered, and as she stalked into their suite and Nick glanced up from his desk, his melted toffee warm and welcoming, it took every ounce of self control not to scream.
‘How's your dad?'
'You tell me.' She slammed the door and leaned against it when his gaze turned compassionate. She didn't need his sympathy, damn it, she needed the truth, all of it.
'Apparently you're so chummy, you visited him.' She snapped her fingers. ‘Hang on, that wasn't about being friendly. You wanted to gloat about finally getting your revenge.'
His expression wary, he stood and moved around the desk towards her. 'What are you talking about?'
'Don't patronise me!'
Her tenuous control on her temper snapped as she pushed off the door and met him halfway, placing both hands squarely in the middle of his chest and pushing, hard. 'He told me about your pact, about you choosing Pa over me. I understand family is important to you, but you could've told me, damn you.’
She pushed again, softer this time, a feeble attempt as her anger gave way to anguish. ‘Do you know how long it took me to get over you? Do you?'
'Let me explain—'
'Don't bother. I get it. You didn't love me enough then and you sure as hell don't love me now.'
To her mortification, she couldn’t subdue a sob, and knuckling away her tears added to her pathetic meltdown.
‘You've got this all wrong.' He manacled her wrists and she let him, the fight drained out of her as she slumped onto the back of a chair.
'Have I? Because what my father said made sense.'
Releasing her wrists, he stepped back and ran a hand through his hair, his eyes filled with concern.
'Remember when you went to Brisbane for a month before leaving for London? Darby didn't know you were leaving permanently, he thought you were coming back. So he warned me off you, threatened to take the plantation off Pa if I didn't back off.'
Anger tightened his voice, his shoulders bunching as he stalked to the window and braced against it.
'After Mum left, running the farm was the only thing that kept Pa going and I couldn't let your father ruin him because of me. So I did what I thought was right at the time, letting him believe he'd succeeded in ending things between us.'
Damn her dad.
Damn Nick for being right.
She couldn't blame him for his loyalty to Pa, couldn't fault his logic, but she didn't want logic right now, she needed to vent.
She glared at him. 'Moot point, considering you'd already ended things between us.'
'I didn't want to let you go, Red.'
The sorrow in his tone had her head snapping up to scan his face for proof he was hurting as much as she was.
'Then why? Why did you shut me out those last few weeks? Why did you push me away at the end?'
'You had your dreams, I had mine. We weren't in the right place back then to sustain a relationship.'
His sincerity twanged her heartstrings, hard, and she gulped as a fresh wave of tears swamped her.
'And now? Our marriage—'
'Was never about revenge, not for one damn minute.' He strode across the room, dropped to his knees, and grabbed her hand. 'Do you honestly think I'd use you like that?'
'I don't know what to think—'
