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Rossi: Fuck you, asshole. I haven’t had sex with my wife in months.
His message wasn’t meant to hurt me, but it did. It also snapped me back to reality. The reality is … I shouldn’t have done what I just did.
I pull my clothes back on quickly before Rossi shows up with the soap and ointment, and within a few minutes, the shower turns on at the exact moment he knocks on the door. Waiting a few seconds, I open it to find the things I asked for sitting by her door.
As I head into the bathroom, I grab a washcloth. “Dove?” I say faintly.
“Yes?” she answers, and through the glass, I watch her naked silhouette as she washes herself off.
“I have some stuff for you to use on your back. Just do it gently.” Squirting some of the soap onto the cloth, I roll my sleeve up before sticking it in the shower under the spray. Once it’s wet and bubbly, I clear my throat. “We need to clean those cuts on your back. And then when you get out, we’ll need to put this ointment on you too.”
Peeking out at me, she smiles. “Look at you, a real-live nurse,” she teases playfully. “Where’s your hot-nurse costume?”
Sliding the door further open, she slowly spins so that her back is to me. Water drips down her ass cheeks, and suddenly, I’m thirsty, wishing I could lick it off. It takes every bit of self-control inside of me not to do just that.
Reaching for her, I run the soapy cloth over her back when she looks over her shoulder bashfully.
“Wouldn’t it be easier if you just got in?” Her voice is delicate and unsure.
I continue to clean her wounds. I can’t get in that shower with her. Our time is running out, and if I got in the shower with her right now, I’d never want to leave.
“If I got in there right now, I’d be inside of you within two minutes. Unfortunately, we don’t have time. I have to get out of here before Enzo finds out I’m still in Italy.” I pull my hand back, taking the cloth with me. “Finish up. I’ll get the ointment ready.”
Her shoulders sink, and I instantly regret it. I consider stripping off really quick, getting in there with her, and holding her wet, naked body close to mine. I wouldn’t need anything else. That, right there, would be enough.
The trouble is, I wouldn’t want to let her go. And I have to. Everyone knows you can’t keep a dove for yourself.
One by one, I rub ointment onto the painful marks brought on by the man I now hate more than any other human being in this world. My fingers work slowly and delicately, making sure no spot is left out.
“So … six years?” she says faintly, keeping her head turned against the pillow.
“Yep. Just hasn’t been a big priority,” I utter, not wanting to go into the details of why I couldn’t even stand another woman looking at me until now. “Where are your pajamas?” I ask, changing the subject.
“I can do that,” she says and attempts to get up.
“No,” I say boldly. “Let me. Please.”
She eyes me over, and I can tell the six-years-of-no-sex thing is still on her mind, but finally, she sighs. “The bottom drawer. That’s where my sleep shirts and shorts are.”
Finding some soft pajamas, I make my way back to where she now sits on the edge of the bed, and I pull her shirt down over her head.
“I can get dressed, you know.”
“I know you can.” I pull her arms out, one at a time. “Let me take care of you. Please.”
Once the shirt is on, I gently press her collarbone to direct her to lie down. And then, one ankle at a time, I pull her panties on, followed by sleep shorts.
I hold my hand out, and she takes it and pulls to sit back up.
“I fucking hate that I have to leave you, but I’ve got to get going. You’re going to be okay, I promise.”
I can’t tell her that there are several undercover agents in the house. Hell, I can’t even tell her I’m one of them. But maybe, just maybe, she’ll believe me that she’s going to be okay.
I know I can’t be with her after she’s free and I close this case. I have a voice in my head that’s always telling me that it’s wrong to be with her or any other woman. It’ll be with me till the day that I die. It wouldn’t be fair to her to drag her through life with a man who could never be all in. She deserves so much more than that.
“What I’m going to tell you is important, okay?” I murmur, bringing her hand to my lips and kissing it. “You need to act like you hate me in front of absolutely everyone. If Enzo returns home and says I’m a creep, you need to agree. As far as everyone is concerned, I’m no one to you.”
“Okay,” she whispers quietly.
