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“If I have to, I’ll take you one piece at a time until I’ve won the duel, and I walk away with a new mother.”
I couldn’t bring myself to move. I was beaten. I wasn’t even a whole man. It was time to welcome death. It seemed like a peaceful adventure at that moment. I closed my eyes and turned my face up to the falling rain. Ready to accept my fate.
The sound of a gunshot echoed in my ears, startling me, and my eyes popped open. Katherine stood beside me. In one hand, she clutched the ruby; in the other, her smoking pistol pointed at the sky. A goddess in her righteous fury. The rain plastered her white shift to her body, and the wind whipped her hair around her face. The sight of her was all that held me together.
“Take one more step toward him, and I’ll reconsider sparing you,” she shouted. Cocking the pistol and pointing it at Peter. “The duel is over. I’m choosing to stay with James. Now, get the fuck off this ship!” she shrieked, firing off another round into the sky. The Heart of the Divine obeyed Katherine’s commands, ending the fight and the rules that bound us. A bewildered Pan took to the air, flying off toward the mainland.
The moment Pan took flight, Katherine knelt beside me. “James!” She grabbed my wrist and raised it high above my head, panic trembling through her body. “Keep your arm up. We must stop the bleeding.” She ripped at her shift, wadding up the fabric and pressing it firmly against the bloody stump. Scorching, white-hot pain ripped through my body.
“Fuck, Katherine! Stop, just stop.”
“I’m sorry, James. I’m so sorry. I can’t. I have to stop the bleeding.”
“Don’t bother. I’m ready… to meet my… my demise.” I focused on the immense pain. The way the blood felt sticky and warm, spilling down my arm. I deserved every agonizing spark. I’d lost. It was over.
“Smee!” Kat yelled, ignoring me. Straining, she pulled the belt from my waist. “Help me wrap this tourniquet.”
“I’ve never seen blood like this before. We need faerie dust. Miss Hawkins, where’s your pixie?” Smee briefly turned his eyes to mine before looking back at the sanguineous mess before him. I must have been a gruesome sight because his face was ghostly white, and he was sweating profusely. “This is going to hurt, Captain. Brace yourself.” He wrapped the belt around my arm. His hands were now almost black, coated in my dark purple blood.
“Fuuckk!” I screamed as he tightened the makeshift tourniquet. Pain shot down my arm and through my missing hand. It wasn’t there, but I could still feel it. My vision blurred, and the world around me faded in and out of darkness.
“She’s in our cabin.” Katherine’s voice seemed miles away.
“Just let… me…” I pleaded.
“Starkey! Go, find the damn pixie and bring her here. Now!” Smee barked orders, taking the lead.
Why were they ignoring me? There was no need for them to save me. I didn’t want to survive. Everything I fought for, everything I endured, it was all for naught. I’d never defeat Pan as half a man. He had won. The bastard had bested me. I closed my eyes and wished for death.
“How long should it take?” The distant sound of Katherine’s voice roused me, bringing back the searing pain and the memory of how I’d failed. I struggled to hear her words, though I could sense her presence beside me.
“It should have worked by now. Give me the damned pixie,” Smee demanded. “I’ll shake every last drop of dust from her pathetic little frame.”
“You’ll do no such thing!” Kat snapped back. “Meadow, please. We have to try?”
I heard the buzz of Meadow’s wings pass by my ear. “I told you both. Faerie dust can’t cure everything. More won’t change his outcome. At least the bleeding has stopped. If he’s lucky, he’ll survive.”
“Smee…” The word came out as a mere whisper. It was all I could muster. I opened my eyes, blinking away the confusion. I was still splayed out on the deck.
“James!” Katherine grabbed my left hand. “He’s awake!” She smiled down at me. Her beautiful face shone like an angel against the cloud-peppered sky. “You’re safe. The bleeding has stopped. You’re going to be okay. Let me get you some water.”
“Where is Smee?”
“I’m here, Captain.” Smee’s head popped into view.
“Rum,” I demanded.
“No need.” Katherine squeezed my hand. “I have an elixir?—”
“No!” I wouldn’t use her magics. My trust in her was wavering. Plus, I didn’t want a reprieve from the physical pain. I was a failure. I deserved to feel every gut-wrenching throb. Rum, however, would dull my aching psyche.
“James,” she pleaded. “Let me help. I know you are in immense pain.”
“Help me to my cabin.”
“Captain, you’ve lost a lot of blood. I don’t think you should stand just yet,” Smee warned.
I instinctively tried to push myself upright, forgetting my current predicament, and immediately regretted my haste. Searing pain radiated through my mutilated limb the moment it touched the decking, quickly reminding me of the devastation inflicted by Pan. “Rum, now!” I gritted out through clenched teeth.
