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My vagina.
This man… I’ll never be the same.
I swallow thickly in order to reply, “I bet you have to drag the ladies out of your bed the next day.” It’s meant to be teasing. However, my tone sounds more sad than anything. I can’t seem to help it. The thought of another woman lying next to him, in this very spot, sends a wave of sadness washing over me.
“I couldn’t say,” he replies, his voice thick.
How could he not know? “You can tell me,” I say, irritated that he’s not being honest with me.
“Baby, I wouldn’t know because you’re the first woman to sleep in this house with me, in this bed.”
“What?” I whisper my disbelief.
“Just you, Court. You’re the first.”
I don’t know how it’s possible, but he has no reason to lie to me. He’s given me a first, and it’s only fair he knows that he has one of mine as well. “Mine too. Well, not just here, but my first time sleeping next to someone. A man, someone,” I add.
“How is that possible?” he asks, voicing my thoughts about him.
With the darkness of the room, I give him more. “In my... limited experience, it’s been more of get in, get out, and go home.” I can’t believe I just told him that, but Ryder’s words still ring in my ears.
Fight for what you want.
I can’t expect to get more of this... situation if I’m not willing to put myself out there. It’s scary as hell, but I don’t want to live with the regrets of what if.
“So you’ve never woken up with a warm body next to yours?”
“Not until you.”
CHAPTER
TEN
Merrick
I’m reeling. How has this beautiful creature been overlooked by the men in this town? I know Willow River is small, but Courtney is... not easily missed. There’s a fire burning inside me at her confession. It could also be that she’s lying next to me in nothing but panties and my T-shirt. I want to give her everything she’s missed. I want to be the one who experiences all of her firsts with her. I want to be there for all of it.
I don’t understand the feeling, but I’m not running away from it either. We have a connection, and even though we’re pretending, it’s easy because, well, I don’t have to pretend when I’m with Courtney.
“Let me show you.” Fuck me, my voice is so thick with desire, even I can hear it. She doesn’t reply, but in the stillness of the room, I can hear her breathing pick up. She’s processing, and I can give her time to do that.
“Okay.”
Okay?
Holy fuck, she said okay.
My heart hammers in my chest. The pressure is on not to fuck this up for her. This is her first time sleeping next to a man. Swallowing hard, I reach for her. “Come closer,” I tell her. She does as I ask and helps me haul her into my body.
My hand settles on her hip as I think about how I want this to go. I know what I want. I want to strip her bare and slide inside her. I want to hear her moan for me, and then hold her all night long, but that’s not what this is about. This is about her and giving her something she’s never experienced.
Maybe with time, the other ideas bouncing around in my head will come to fruition.
“Hey,” I whisper as I move my hand to trace her spine. I feel her shiver against me.
“Hey.”
“Thank you,” I say softly.
