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“Tomorrow,” he said when I failed to answer, and as was often the case between us, he kissed my hand.
“Here,” I said, clinging tighter when he tried to depart. “Meet me here, before dawn. I would like to bring a new day to fruition with you at my side, dear, beautiful, wonderous Dax.”
Dax smiled and squeezed my fingers. “Then here I shall be.”
“Hush, Pyrois. We will leave soon enough.” I patted the red mare’s nose, and she snorted in impatience with tiny licks of flames escaping her snout.
The horses grew restless when dawn approached.
Today, the same was true for me.
My left hand that continued to pet Pyrois was the one that bore a sunburst cuff connected to a ring. Why save it for a wedding band, I’d thought after losing Hyacinth, when there was no hope of me ever giving my heart to another? There was no heart left in me to give, only a husk.
I felt my heart struggling to beat again now, cracking the ice that had frozen around it, not to shatter all that was left of it, but to burst forth from its prison with new life.
Almost. Almost, it beat for me in rhythm.
“Your sunset tunic,” I heard from behind me and looked to see Dax approaching. “Or sunrise, I should say. I never tire of seeing it on you.” He, in contrast, wore a deep blue tunic with shimmers of celestial black, as if dotted with stars, like the sky before the sunrise began.
“Thank you. And you, dear Dax, look lovely.” I patted Pyrois’s nose again, and then met Dax and took his hand to lead him onto the chariot.
The horses were hitched, with Helios ever at the ready, currently out of sight. The tethers of my chariot to his brilliant mass were unseen by mortal eyes, but once we took flight, they would pull the great burning sun behind us as easily as a chariot on earth pulled a wagon.
It was a far larger vehicle than would be feasible for a mortal driver, and Dax marveled at being upon it, as I guided him to sit on the bed. Leaving him to lounge, beautiful as ever as he sprawled upon its pillows, I moved to the small platform up front, taking the reins to begin our trek.
“Onward, Aethon, Pyrois, Phlegon, and Eous!” I urged my steeds. “Let us light the dawn!”
Full pelt forward, they galloped us off the edge of the balcony. My horses had no wings, but they took flight as if they did, and for a moment, my wings were visible, propelling us with an added boost. I glanced back to see the widening of Dax’s eyes at the outline of their sunbeam spectacle, which he very rarely got to glimpse.
But I looked not to gauge his wonderment of me. I nodded behind us so Dax might turn and witness as Helios appeared, rising from beneath the horizon to join us in the sky.
Dax gasped when he saw and crawled up the bed to better peer over the chariot’s edge. With him crouched on his knees and bent forward, the view was… encouraging.
I released the reins, for once set on their path, my horses knew the way.
Dax turned to face me, sensing my approach, and sprawled again in wait. He offered a hand as I neared him and yanked me onto the cushions. I laughed from the tumble. He was very different from Aikos. More genuine. More open. Although I knew Aikos had never lied to me, and in fact, had shown me the sweetest truth that led me here.
A truth I hoped to see made real.
I turned my attention to the center of the chariot, and with a wave of my hand, my lyre was summoned, along with a pan flute, and they hung in the air, playing the same music that Dax and I had played together.
Dax giggled, moving closer to me across the bed, and reached for my face. But he hesitated, hand hovering between us.
“You can touch me, if you’d like,” I encouraged.
“I would like that very much,” he said, fingertips near my lips but still not touching them. “I would like to offer you the heights of what my training taught me, to make the sun god whine and writhe and whimper for release that I would… eventually grant you.”
Courtesan training indeed.
“But,” Dax continued, “if we are two men, not man and god, what do you want of a mortal coupling, Apollo? If any coupling at all?”
“If any?” I stammered, not having expected an offer of celibacy.
“I yearn for more of your kiss, your hands on me, your body pressed to mine,” Dax so intimately professed that it made my heart race like in the midst of a hunt right before my arrow loosed. “I yearn for any touch you might grant me, but it is not only the promise of pleasure that keeps me with you. I want you, Apollo. All of you. Your heart most of all. I can wait to know the wonders of your body entwined with mine if you need more time—”
“No.” I said it swiftly and, like some eager boy just reaching adulthood, kissed his hovering fingers, desperate to not be denied my first taste. “Please. No more waiting. I want to believe that happiness does not have to be fleeting.”
At last, he touched my lips, and I parted them at his press. I licked their tips, and he expelled another laugh. Then he slid his hand to my cheek and pulled me to him.
