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“We’ve been compromised!” Scottie shouted.
“You. Will. Die.” A computerized voice said.
“Who the fuck is that?” Lock shouted. “Tell him…tell him…”
“Tell him what?” Scottie shouted, panic lacing his voice. He was flipping switches, but the alarms kept blaring and the overhead light shorted.
The voice laughed in a low, robotic voice. “How does it feel to have seconds to live?”
“Where the fuck is that coming from?” I shouted, sitting in the co-pilot’s seat. I didn’t know what the fuck I was doing, but I started hitting shit, hoping something would help.
“Uh…guys?” Scottie said. His head jerked toward us and his eyes were as wide as saucers. “I don’t know who the fuck that is! I’ve lost control!”
“Are you fucking kidding me? You’re the pilot! This is your one job!” Edu shouted.
“We’ve been boarded by an imaginary person!” Scottie shouted. “How the fuck is that my fault.”
“Warning! Warning! Warning!” The red light above Scottie’s head started flashing, along with a symbol that I didn’t want to put a name to.
“Shit! We’re being painted!”
“Great,” Lock nodded. “So… tell me that means something really awesome, like someone’s painting us flying in the sky!”
“Are you fucking insane?” Scottie yelled. “Parachutes now! We’re going down!”
We all rushed to the back, but Edu already had his on and was tossing them as we ran toward the back. As I secured mine around my thighs, Edu flung the door open. The air pressure dropped in the plane and the beeping in the front taunted us.
“Alright!” Lock shouted over the whooshing of the air around us. “We jump and meet up and make contact within one hour!”
I glanced back toward the front of the plane and saw Scottie laughing hysterically. He had tears sliding down his cheeks as he pointed at us.
“What the fuck are you laughing at?” I turned to Lock. “He’s fucking lost it! One too many plane crashes finally got to him!”
“No—no!” Scottie gasped for air. “It’s just—” He swiped at his face again, trying to stop laughing. “I’m sorry, but you guys are all… ah! Ah! And I’m like…laughing my ass off!”
Lock stormed over and punched him hard in the face. “Pull yourself together! This isn’t the time to lose your shit!”
Scottie pulled out a device and flicked a button. Suddenly, everything went quiet. The lights went back to normal and the alarms stopped flashing.
“You…you were fucking with us?” I said accusingly.
“Hey, I have to have some fun, too,” Scottie grinned. “You have no idea how long I’ve been working on this.”
“We’re on a fucking plane!” Lock shouted. “One of us could have jumped!”
I nodded, turning to Edu. I looked around, then started slapping Lock on the arm.
“What? Would you stop fucking hitting me!”
“Uh…Lock, I think we have a problem!”
He spun and faced me, chest heaving as he suddenly realized what was wrong. Scottie wasn’t laughing now either. Together, we stepped toward the door and looked outside to the city below. In the distance, I could make out Edu’s parachute as he floated to the city below.
Scottie nodded slightly. “We’re low enough. He should be fine.”
We landed at the airport and immediately grabbed our shit and headed to the SUV. Once inside, I strapped Scottie down, duct-taping his mouth shut. He glared at Lock and me as we turned and faced him in the back.
“Mmhm-muh-muh-muh!”
