AllFreeNovel
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Watching hockey. Watching TJ. Fooling around with Nandy is the farthest thing from what I need. Sex with the man TJ wants, when my mind gets more and more stuck on TJ for reasons…well he is hot…he is big, strong…Nandy and I have never been interested in the same person before. Because until I met TJ, the only person I’ve ever been interested in is Nandy.
My bartender is working tonight.
My bartender. My affection for Derek has nothing to do with the drinks he pours, obviously. He also knows how I feel about Nandy. But he’s happy to fill in for him whenever I need. Happy to let me let go, express feelings I can’t with Nandy. Say things to him, I can’t to Nandy.
How would he feel if he knew there was someone else now? Someone else he is filling in for. Someone I’ll never be able to actually be with. That once again he is a fill-in and not the object of my affection. We’ve been at this for a long time. He knows the deal. And he has others he toys with. He’s more than a bartender here. He’s a worker, an instructor. He can be a Dom or a sub and everything in between. Not everyone can pull that off.
He sends a wink my way as he wipes the counter and returns his attention to a paying customer. He is hot. Thick brown hair perfectly styled to show off those high cheekbones and narrow nose. His beard neatly trimmed along that chiseled jaw. His biceps flex and release as he wipes the bar down and then turns to make a drink. He serves it up with a smile. A smile that makes you think you are the only person on the planet. It’s a gift making people feel that way. I know someone else who has that gift. And until this moment, I hadn’t realized how much they look alike.
Movement on the stage grabs my attention. Partially because the stage is new. It seems to be the trend in clubs like this to have a stage for, uh, performing in various ways. It was easy to take nearly half of the dance floor and create a stage. It was even easier to hire some very talented performers to dance and sing throughout the week.
The feel is old school burlesque, and I love it.
Most nights, it is just a burlesque show. No actual fornication taking place on stage. That takes place through another set of doors and allows a whole new set of clientele, who aren’t ready for that next set of doors, to dip their toes in the water here.
Watching live sex can be overwhelming in so many ways.
I walk to the stage, moving through the sea of people with ease. Everyone knows who I am. They are probably hoping for a glimpse of that live fornication with me and the beautiful young thing on stage. But I don’t expose myself publicly in that way. I keep some things just for my clients, occasionally a certain bartender, and, of course, Nandy. But none of those particular lovers have been filling my thoughts lately.
The beautiful young thing dancing and gyrating and singing is not my type at all. Not even close. But he is beautiful and maybe a change is what I need tonight. Maybe I need something as far from my norm as I can get. As far from the completely off-limits man I can’t stop thinking about as I can get. I’m not the one he wants, anyway.
I hop onto the stage, and without even asking, a microphone hits my hand. I sang here the night we unveiled the stage. Nobody knew I could. And now anytime I get within a few feet of the stage, it seems I’m hoisted onto it and forced to sing.
Forced.
I could master no instrument the way Nandy could. But I have the pipes and always have. And I have hips. Hips that love to move.
I sing and dance and gyrate all around the young man, sharing the stage with me. He meets all of my moves and I yank him into a kiss at the end of the song, further stoking the flames of the surrounding crowd. It’s a sweet kiss. Tongues twist lightly. But lips do not mash together. Teeth don’t grab lips and snap down. He grabs my ass with a tender hand. Solidifying that this will go no further. I smile at him and pull back.
“Thank you,” I whisper in his ear. I run a thumb across his flushed cheeks and across his pouty bottom lip.
Running down the steps alongside the stage, I look at my bartender leaning against the back of the bar, his expression hot with lust and I’m struck again by how much he reminds me of TJ. Maybe it’s just that is who I want him to be tonight.
I tip my head to the double doors.
He tosses his towel at the other bartender and follows me.
He reaches me before we reach the next set of doors and grabs me from behind, fisting the collar of my shirt in his hand and spinning me around. His large hand settles firmly on the back of my neck and tugs me in close to his body. His fingers thread into my hair and he grabs hold and tugs my head back, exposing my throat to him.
He licks and nibbles like a vampire teasing his prey before taking that fateful bite. I moan loudly. I need this.
“Please take me.” It comes out as a raspy whine. Derek presses his erection to mine and bites my neck.
We lay on the enormous bed in the playroom reserved for me and Nandy. I stroke my fingers along his tanned muscular arms. Tonight felt good. He feels good. Why can’t he be the one?
“What if I told you I’m interested in someone…someone who isn’t Nandy?”
“I’d say hallelujah, and it’s about damn time. Who is it?”
“Well, he plays hockey…and there is a slight fly in the ointment.”
“Of course there is.”
“He’s interested in Nandy.”
“Oh, Fynn, why do you do this to yourself?”
I laugh. “Because I’m good at it?”
