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And then, slowly but inexorably, Kurt Buck turned around and walked back out the door.
Maxwell didn’t move as the door clicked shut.
Kurt was back.
He had never once thought about what he would do if Kurt ever came back. He didn’t have a contingency plan. He didn’t have an escape route. This changed everything.
Garrett finally stirred behind Maxwell, and Maxwell moved quickly out of his way. He watched as Garrett walked toward the door and stuffed down a cry of alarm. He took a few stumbling steps after him before sticking his feet to the floor. Please don’t leave, please don’t. Maxwell locked the pleas tight behind his teeth.
But Garrett just slid the lock into place and flicked off the outside light. “I think that’s enough excitement for one night.”
Maxwell sagged so heavily he had to steady himself on the examination table.
“Come here.” Garrett returned to him and opened his arms. As was so often the case with Garrett, Maxwell’s feet moved before his brain decided to. He all but threw himself into the man’s arms, and Garrett caught him and held him tightly, tucking Maxwell’s head under his chin.
Maxwell should have let himself be held sooner. Garrett’s body was warm and hard and gentle, and if Maxwell focused on it hard enough, it made everything seem okay. He tangled his fingers into the fabric over Garrett’s chest and inhaled the rich scent of him. He spoke words on the exhale without meaning to. “I thought he was dead.”
“It sounds like everyone did.” Garrett stroked his thumbs over Maxwell’s upper arms, and Maxwell grabbed his nearest hand and brought it up to his face. He pressed Garrett’s palm right over where Kurt had caressed his cheek while Maxwell examined him. Garrett seemed to take the hint and rubbed his thumb over Maxwell’s cheekbone as though to scrub away Kurt’s touch. “You didn’t do anything wrong.”
“I…” Hadn’t he, though? Done something wrong? Maxwell must have done something wrong to end up in this situation. “I don’t know.”
“I do,” Garrett growled and tightened his grip on Maxwell.
Garrett didn’t, though. Garrett didn’t know Maxwell at all, not really. Because Maxwell never let him because Maxwell wasn’t an idiot that fell in love and relinquished all power over himself anymore.
Maxwell turned his face into Garrett’s palm. “You don’t know me. Not like he does.”
“Did.” Garrett slipped his other hand into Maxwell’s hair so that he cradled his head and gently tilted his face to look into his eye. “He did know you. But I don’t think you’re the same person anymore.”
Maxwell swallowed and nodded as much as he could with Garrett’s firm hands on him. “You’re right. I’m not.” For better or worse, Maxwell couldn’t rightly tell anymore.
He stared into Garrett’s eyes as his aching heart twisted and his pulse spiked.
Maxwell had always had to fight his instincts when it came to Garrett. He’d always had to deflect the questions, avoid the touches, dodge the prolonged eye contact because if he didn’t, then he knew—he knew—Garrett would see right through him. He’d see right through the feigned disinterest to the dangerous, ridiculous longing that simmered below the surface.
But now his walls were down—wrecked by Kurt’s sudden appearance—and Garrett had his hands on his face and his body all but wrapped around him. Garrett’s forehead creased, and his eyes went piercing and thoughtful, and dammit, he could see him. Maxwell tried to step back, but at the barest hint of resistance from Garrett—the slightest tightening of Garrett’s hands on his face—he stopped.
Maxwell licked his lips and let out a shaky breath. “Garrett.”
“You know I’d give you anything, right?” Garrett petted his thumbs over Maxwell’s cheeks, and Maxwell suppressed a shiver. “Anything you need.”
Maxwell had to swallow to wet his dry mouth. “I don’t need anything.”
Garrett’s lips twisted in a sad half smile. He didn’t believe him. Hell, Maxwell didn’t believe himself. “I mean it, Maxwell. I’d give it to you. Not trade it to you. I’m not asking for anything in return.”
No strings. That was what Garrett was saying, wasn’t it? But everything had strings. “I don’t need anything from you, Garrett.”
Disappointment flashed through Garrett’s eyes, but he took the rejection as easily as he always did. He dropped his hands from Maxwell’s cheeks. “Alright.”
Before Maxwell could consider taking it all back, Garrett walked past him to one of the examination tables and ripped off the dirty paper. Maxwell frowned and turned to watch as Garrett walked about the room and put everything back to rights, dropping used tools in the sink and ripping off old sanitary paper, the usual things he did.
Maxwell’s chest clogged with emotion. “You don’t have to do all that.”
“No, but I want to.” Garrett sent him that roguish smile over his shoulder, and Maxwell let out a huff of laughter despite himself and dropped onto a stool.
“How do you have so much energy?” Maxwell rubbed his eyes under his glasses and let Garrett bustle around, finding comfort in the familiarity of the scene.
“Momentum.” Garrett chuckled. He worked his way around the room until he stood in front of Maxwell and then reached a hand down to him. “Come on. Let’s get you to bed.”
