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Jay slips back into the room. He has a plate of cheese, pepperoni, and crackers, and he offers it to me. “I know you said you’re hungry a lot,” he whispers. “I thought you might want a snack too.”
I motion to the phone, even as my mouth waters for the snack he’s prepared.
“Violet?” Hannah’s voice sounds tinny coming from my phone. Jay’s eyebrows go up. I put her on speaker, so I can hear her more easily. “I thought you said you’re about to go to sleep. Why is Jay bringing you a snack? And–”
I can’t listen to the questions anymore, so I just blurt it out. “I’m pregnant, Hannah.”
The phone is silent for a good two minutes.
Hannah's voice is incredulous. "I can’t believe this. Violet, what the hell?”
For some reason, her negative reaction hurts more than Jay’s. I expected Jay to react negatively, and hell, it wasn’t even negative, just shocked.
But Hannah has been my best friend for as long as I can remember. I always imagined us celebrating whoever got pregnant first. Of course, none of my imaginary scenarios included her brother in any way, but… there’s no changing that now.
“How long have you known? And why didn’t you tell me sooner?"
I feel tears prick at the corners of my eyes. "I found out a few days ago. I’ve been trying to figure out how to deal with it. It’s not like I planned for this to happen."
Hannah lets out a frustrated sigh. "Vi, this is huge! I can't believe you didn’t tell me right away. And… wait, Jay is..." It’s like Hannah’s just put everything together.
"Yes, Jay’s the father. He’s… I just told him tonight. So, it’s not like I was keeping it from you for a long time.”
“But… God, Violet! Have you never heard of protection? Were you not on the pill? Or Jay could have used a condom? I mean, the world is full of options, but Jay! He’s the worst person who could have gotten you pregnant.”
I glance up at Jay and watch him flinch as his sister’s words hit him.
“Hannah, he has his issues like anyone, but he’s not so bad. He and I actually understand each other, and…”
“I’m just saying you should have been more careful. You should have used protection.
“This just happens sometimes. Don’t act like I’m the first person in the world it’s happening to.”
Jay clears his throat, his voice steady. "It wasn't planned, Hannah. We didn’t expect this, but now that it’s happening, we’re going to deal with it together."
Hannah lets out a huff. "Jay, no one asked for your opinion. I’m talking to Violet, so I’d appreciate it if you’d butt out.”
Jay reaches for the phone, then yanks his hand back. Instead, he rushes out of the room. I hear him hurry down the stairs. I go to the bedroom door, but I can’t tell where he’s gone. I don’t like this sudden feeling of being alone.
I swallow again, struggling to deal with my emotions. "We’re trying to figure it out, Hannah. We’re going to see a doctor, make a plan. We know it’s serious. But we’re not teenagers and I don’t appreciate you acting like we are.”
Hannah’s voice softens some. "I’m sorry, Vi. I didn’t mean to sound so harsh. I’m just worried about you. This is a big deal. Jay isn’t the most responsible. He can take care of his bar alright, but I don’t think he can take care of you. I’m just being realistic."
"Realistically, he’s reacting to this better than you are. Yes, I need to be realistic, but I also need support. I didn’t see my dad dying a couple of months ago or getting pregnant before I was in a steady relationship. I’m kind of freaking out here, but sure, I’ll be realistic and calm just for your benefit.”
“Violet, I’m sorry. Seriously. Okay, I’ll try to keep my issues with Jay to myself. I love my brother but... I don’t know,” she sighs.
“Can you just pretend you’re happy for me?” I sound whiny, but I can’t help it.
“Of course I’m happy for you, Vi! I’m… wow. I’m barely able to believe it. Can you call me again tomorrow and tell me the news? I’ll be ready to react excitedly. I just have to take some time to process this.”
That isn’t the kind of answer I want. I want Hannah to squeal my ear off and talk about baby names with me. But that isn’t what I got.
That’s not realistic.
I end the call and step out into the hallway. “Jay?” I call softly, but he doesn’t answer.
CHAPTER 41
