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But still, it’s hard not to feel a certain way after everything that’s happened over the last two months. Maybe I’m San Diego’s first choice, or maybe I’m not. Maybe I’m never anybody’s first choice.
And there it is. The effect of Amelia’s cheating as it hits me right in the face.
It took a minute for me to get to this point—for me to see some of the lasting effects of it. But there it is, making me feel like I’m not good enough in a moment when I should be celebrating an offer from a new team.
My entire life, I’ve strived to be perfect for everyone around me because everyone always expected me to be a certain way. I had straight As. I worked hard. I made it all the way to the NFL. But none of those successes have given me an ounce of victory when it comes to my personal life.
I chose wrong, and breaking up with Amelia was admitting I’d made a mistake. I think that’s part of what took me so damn long to do it—something my mother pointed out to me when I was with her in New York.
Is accepting the first offer another mistake?
There’s no way of knowing. It’s one of the risks that comes with this profession. But putting them off is a different risk entirely since they could pull the offer if I make them wait.
I stare out the window of the hotel I’ve stayed in for the last five days. I’m looking out over the water, palm trees swaying gently in the breeze, and for the first time, it feels like home.
Maybe it’ll be a mistake, but it’s only a mistake for the next three years.
“Take it,” I say.
“You sure?” he asks.
“I’m sure.”
“You got it, Nash,” he says. “I’ll be in touch with the details.”
“Thanks, Jake.” We cut the call, and I stare out the window as a feeling of excitement washes over me.
A new team. A new town. A new home.
I think this is exactly the fresh start I needed.
Chapter 10: Grace Newman
Two Years, Seventy-Five Acres, and Complete Confusion
The Week Before the Wedding
I watch the footage again just to be certain I heard what I thought I heard.
My new routine each morning is fast-forwarding through any footage taken the previous night on the new cameras to see whether Amelia and Drew showed up again, and so far…nada. Apparently they’re more comfortable doing it at her place—or his—since Spencer isn’t around to catch them.
I watch as Drew walks into my office, but this time he’s by himself.
I watch as he rifles through the papers on top of my desk.
I watch as he tries the drawers, but they’re all locked.
“Did you find anything?” I hear Amelia’s voice before I see her on the screen.
“All the drawers are locked. Do you have a key?”
Amelia shakes her head as she walks into my office.
“Dammit. How will we find out if she knows?” Amelia asks.
Drew shrugs. “No idea. But if you marry me, then you’ll get the vineyard.”
“I guess that’s our only option at this point.” She sighs as she folds her arms across her chest.
