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“Very.” I took a seat at the counter, not sure what else to do.
As the cobwebs of sleep started clearing in my brain, I suddenly realized he had probably come home and found me asleep on the couch in the living room. I was renting the entire upstairs and had fallen asleep in the living room. How embarrassing. However, it didn’t seem to bother Jesse one bit. He didn’t even mention it.
Maybe he had fallen asleep on that couch before and knew that sometimes, it was less about what was comfiest and more about what was close by because you were so exhausted.
“Did you have a good evening?” I decided it was time to try and make some conversation.
Based on previous interactions, I didn’t really expect this one to go anywhere. To my surprise, Jesse turned to face me.
“It was as good as it could be, I suppose,” he said. “Somewhat emotional.”
I pursed my lips. I hadn’t meant to make him feel emotional last night. However, I supposed if he was getting emotional, it was a good place to start. His walls were coming down… and that was honestly the last thing I had ever expected.
“I’m sorry if I said something upsetting,” I said softly. “That was not my intention at all last night.” I pursed my lips.
I wasn’t sure what else to say. Or what I could say. It wasn’t like I could convince Jesse that I hadn’t meant to pry. I surely hadn’t, but it kind of looked that way no matter what I said.
“Actually, it was something you said that made me realize perhaps I’ve been too harsh with you,” Jesse admitted. “I think it’s time you learned where I have been going when I don’t have a shift at the fire house or plans here.”
I raised an eyebrow. It seemed that I had been able to get through to him after all. It wasn’t at all what I thought we’d be doing this morning. However, after the breakfast burritos had been finished on the pan, he handed me a plate with two. I smiled a little. At least he was learning. That was good.
I remained at the counter. He took a seat next to me.
“All right. So where do you go?” I asked. “It’s clearly somewhere important to you.”
“I go to the Chandler Ranch. My routine is a shift at the fire station, and if I don’t have anything else to do here, I go to the ranch. Sometimes, this means I’m only in the house for like twenty-four hours before I go,” he said. “I didn’t anticipate that it would be hard for someone to grasp that I had a lot of things on my plate without hearing of the details.”
“What’s the Chandler Ranch?” I asked.
I had not heard of this place before, but it sounded quite important to him. I didn’t understand why he hadn’t told me before. This didn’t really feel like a deep, dark secret, but I guessed that maybe I’d underestimated just how closed-off Jesse was used to being. If this felt significant to him, I could accept that and appreciate it.
“I grew up on the ranch. That might be part of why I’m not a fan of the city,” he said, a soft blush on his cheeks. “Anyway, I’m sorry for hiding where I was going. I’ve only just now realized that you were probably asking what my schedule was like out of concern or worry when I would just disappear before you even got up.”
“How far away is the ranch?” I pursed my lips before taking a bite of the breakfast burrito on my plate.
“It’s about two hours away. So, I’m usually gone for a couple of days at a time when I go,” he replied.
I nodded slowly. It sounded as though this ranch was a tie to his family, but that could have meant a variety of things. He could have been part of the family that owned it, or part of one of the families that worked on it. There was really no way to tell, and I didn’t want to ask that. It felt too personal right now.
He had only just started to open up to me. What kind of person would I be if I asked that question now?
“Why mention the ranch now?” I pursed my lips.
It simply seemed to be the right time,” he said. “I know it’s not nearly enough to make up for the way I’ve treated you, but I was hoping we might be able to start with a clean slate from here?”
“And when you can no longer fight fires with that being such an extremely physical job, is that what you plan to do? Work at the ranch?” I asked.
“Pretty much. They have plenty of things I could do that won’t necessarily include being physically involved with the animals or the hard physical work.”
I nodded, seeing Jesse in a whole new light.
Chapter twenty-one
Twenty-One: Jesse
I watched, eating my breakfast, as Jade processed my plans. What I hadn’t mentioned to her yet was that one of the main reasons I planned to return to the ranch when I could no longer fight fires was because I knew my parents would always have a place for me there. But that didn’t seem important to tell her right now. Besides, Jade was somewhat right. When it was time for me to stop fighting the fires, I would probably be too physically done to be on the ranch in the capacity I was in right now.
Especially if she worried that I would hurt myself.
