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“U-hum,” he nods, jotting down notes. “Are you sexually active?”
Startled, I look up at him. “Why do you ask?”
“Just considering all possibilities, Miss Sanders,” the doctor replies calmly, his tone reassuring.
My heart skips a beat as shock creeps through my veins. I try to calm down, reminding myself that I’m on birth control.
But then a realization hits me like a cold chill down my spine. I’ve been so busy lately, sometimes forgetting to take it on time.
If I’m pregnant, my world will turn upside down. I’m not prepared for a baby.
And neither is Ethan.
My mind immediately flashes back to Ethan’s comment about not wanting more kids anytime soon.
I take a deep breath, attempting to slow my overflowing thoughts.
Uncertainty hangs heavy in the air, mixing with the antiseptic smell of the room, and a new queasiness settles in my stomach that has nothing to do with being sick.
“It could just be a virus too, right?” I ask, my voice betraying my anxiety.
“Right.” Doctor Heron keeps on taking notes. “That’s why we’ll be doing some exams to confirm what’s going on.”
He stands up and leads me to an exam room. “A nurse will be in shortly to take some samples. I will speak with you after,” he says before leaving.
A few moments later, a nurse comes in. She smiles warmly and says, “Hello, Miss Sanders. I’m going to do a nose swab and then I’ll give you a cup to use the restroom.”
I lean forward and the nurse gently swabs the inside of my nose. Then she hands me a cup. “Please use the restroom down the hall and bring the sample back here.”
Finally, Doctor Heron returns, holding a folder. “Please, take a seat, Miss Sanders,” he says.
Once again, I do as I’m told. “Please don’t leave me hanging, doctor…” I say with an awkward smile.
“You have tested negative for the flu and strep,” he says, and I wince, bracing for the worst. “However, your pregnancy test has returned a positive. Let me be the first to congratulate you.”
I bring my hands to my head and lower my eyes. “I don’t feel like being congratulated, doc.”
Doctor Heron’s eyes widen. He crosses his hands over the desk, nodding with compassion and understanding.
“I assume this is a surprise?” he asks gently.
I nod. “This is the result of a broken condom and my forgetfulness.” I rub my eyes and find myself crying. “I feel so guilty.”
The doctor replies, “I can give you the address to the local family planning clinic, and—”
I shake my head, “I’m not getting rid of the baby.”
Doctor Heron places his hands on the desk, looking thoughtful. “They offer the services of social workers and psychologists too. They can help you figure out what to do.” He waits for a moment and then proceeds, “May I ask if there a father in the picture?”
I sigh, “I don’t know. We’re still dating, but… I don’t know!”
I bite down on my lip and push down the urge to cry. Doctor Heron stands, guides me to the reception, and there he offers me a cup of water. He stays with me until his next patient arrives.
I leave with a prescription for pills to help with the nausea as well as the address to family planning clinic, but I toss the latter in the first thrash bin I find. I do need someone to talk to, but not a clinical person — a friend, and that I don’t have.
Only Amanda crosses my mind, but she is miles away. Ethan told me she knows about us, and I know she won’t tell him anything I don’t want her to.
But do I really want to start spreading the news? My contract with the Iron Huskies ends when the Iron Huskies play their final game in the Stanley Cup playoffs. Even if they make it through to the end, that’s still less than two months away. That will hopefully give me time to think about what to do about everything, especially how to tell Ethan.
