AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“That’s all, huh? Is that all as in that’s all you want it to be, or is that all because you think that’s all it can be?”
I could strangle my brother, I swear. “Weren’t you just going on about how falling in love with him would be stupid?”
“Yes, but that was when I was assuming it was one-sided. If it’s two-sided, as in, if you’re both head over heels like some weirdos, then maybe it’s a good thing. Maybe you can get him to let us go—”
I pinch the bridge of my nose and mutter, “You’re giving me whiplash. And you know what? It doesn’t matter, because I don’t have those feelings and neither does he. That I swear to you, Max. As for letting us go… I do think he’s a man of his word. Once we serve our time, he’ll let us go.”
The way Max stares at me after I say that makes me feel uneasy. It’s like he’s somehow, without speaking a single word, twisting around what I said and using it as evidence of love. Oh, I trust Silus to let us go? Then I must be in love with him.
My face must say it all, because Max goes off on a tangent: “Did I ever tell you about the first time I fell in love? It was at winter formal, freshman year. I don’t think you went. Molly Trudell. Five-foot-nine, pink hair, arms that could break me in two. God, she looked so good in that hot pink dress… I knew she could stomp on me, but I didn’t care. I asked her to dance, anyway. What was the worst she could do, say no?”
I vaguely remember the morning after this dance. I didn’t go because I was working that night—my fast food days, don’t remind me—but Max couldn’t shut up about it afterward. “Where are you going with this?”
He dutifully ignores me. “But she said yes. We danced, and then we made out in the restroom in the art hallway. I was flying high—and then Monday rolled around and she acted like I didn’t exist. First love, first heartbreak.” He sighs with a heavy heart.
Is Max trying to compare the feelings he thinks I have for Silus to the horniness he had for Molly when he was fourteen years old? Yeah, I don’t think they’re the same. The feelings are not remotely similar in any way.
When Max notices my unimpressed look, he adds, “All I’m trying to say is, even if we know things will end badly, sometimes we can’t help it. The heart wants what it wants and all that crap.” His thin shoulders go up and down once. “I just want you to be careful, Thea. Both our lives are in your hands right now. No pressure.”
Yeah, no pressure at all. There are a million and one things I could say to Max in response to that story, but I don’t say anything. Nothing I do or say right now will convince him that I’m not hopelessly in love with Silus. And now that he sort of thinks Silus is in love with me, too?
I mean, that’s just stupid. It’s just sex. That’s all. Hot, addicting, earth-shattering sex. Just two adults coming together and using each other’s bodies to find release. There is nothing deep about it.
Besides, assuming I am noteworthy enough for someone to fall in love with, could a man like Silus ever really love someone else? He’s not the worst psychopath out there, but he’s definitely up there.
Fuck. It doesn’t matter, because there are no feelings of love at all inside me. I don’t love him, and I never will.
Chapter Nineteen – Silus
I do my best to watch Thea and her brother after Roark arrives with him in tow, but Roark makes it difficult by pulling out glasses and a bottle to share from behind the counter. He pours us both a glass, and he gulps it down in an instant. Me? I take my time sipping it, shifting my stare past my brother to the back of Thea’s head.
They’re far enough away that I can only hear a few words here and there. It doesn’t help when they start to whisper amongst themselves. I admit, I am curious as to what Thea and Max will talk about tonight.
“So, how’s it going with her?” Roark asks, his dark eyebrows risen, as if he already has the answer. He pours himself another glass—though this one he does not chug down in two giant gulps.
“It’s… going.” It is the lamest possible answer I could give my brother, but I honestly don’t know how else to reply. Thea is… the same as she’s always been. Addicting, beautiful, and intriguing. I thought I would eventually grow used to her, become accustomed to the way I feel when I’m with her, but I haven’t, and I don’t know if I ever will.
Roark chuckles darkly. “That sounds pretty fucking boring. Tell me you’ve at least fucked her, Silus. If you haven’t, what the fuck are you waiting for?” He sips from his glass, black eyes on me, and he doesn’t bother to hide his concern.
I don’t say a word, but it must be written on my face, because my brother barks out another laugh, sounding like a madman, and he says, “Good, good. You have. I bet she was fucking tight.” He glances over his shoulder at Thea and Max, though his gaze is probably on Thea alone. “You know, I did you a favor by bringing that kid here. You could pay me back by letting me have a go at her.”
“No.” The word leaves me immediately, with no hesitation whatsoever. Roark might get off on sharing—and sometimes it can be hot—but when it comes to Thea, I alone will know what that pussy feels like.
“No?” Roark echoes. “Come on. Just once. I’m dying to know what kind of power her pussy has to get you all worked up like this.” His stare meets mine again, and the slight amusement he wore seconds ago already fell off his face, his typical serious expression in its place.
Again, I say, “No.” And I follow it up with, “She’s mine.”
He chuckles again, though it’s less like he’s chuckling at a joke and more like he’s chuckling incredulously. “Wow. I’ve never seen you like this. She must be something special that you won’t even let me have a taste.” He shrugs and takes another sip from his glass. “It was worth a shot, anyway. You can’t blame me. She’s a sexy little spitfire.”
It’s my turn to chuckle as I drink. “You could have her brother.”
That only makes him glare at me. “You know anything with a dick is off the table for me. You just can’t beat a wet pussy.” The sigh he lets out then is explosive. “I am getting old, though. If dad was still alive he’d be on both our cases to settle down.”
Roark is thirty-seven, two years older than me. When our father was our age, he’d already had us. We are running a little late, timeline wise, but I’ve never found a woman I could ever imagine spending the rest of my life with. Our father was many things: a criminal, a smooth-talker, a savvy businessman, but above all that he was faithful. I’d only want to settle down with someone I know for a fact I could live with until the end.
For some strange reason, with that thought comes an image of a farmhouse in the middle of nowhere, out west in the great plains. Surrounded by nothing but gentle, rolling hills, it’s not an impressive house at all, but once the image pops up in my head, it refuses to disappear.
It’s not my house. It’s Thea’s, the one she wants. Odd I’d think of it now, isn’t it?
