AllFreeNovel
Share Us
“It was low security. I got put on a work detail, then waited for my chance.” His eyes, same as mine, stare at me. “It was that important to me. To get to you. To tell you in person how very sorry I am.”
“Thank you, I appreciate the sentiment.” I eye him, still not sure of his story. “But after all these years, what made you want to apologize?”
“I left your mother. I think your friend told you that. He’s been great by the way—great guy. Really looked out for me to let me talk to you. Kept me for ages first, making sure I was who I said I am but finally?—”
“Dad. Why?”
He looks down at the tops of his worn brown leather boots. “I left your mom. A long time ago. Five years. Right about the time we got to Europe. I knew it was a mistake then, to leave you, but I couldn’t show my face back home. So, I went to Wales on my own.” He gives a happy smile, one I’ve never seen on his face as long as I’ve known him.
My stomach sinks with disgust before he can say the words, knowing what he’s going to say before he says it.
He looks out over the sea. “I met someone. When I first got to Wales. Her name is Elly and she’s the best thing that ever happened to me. We had a little girl.”
Sickness, coldness, nausea, and dread pool in my stomach. “You did.”
“Yeah. We did. We called her Megan. She looked a bit like you.” He adds, “The moment she was born, I knew I needed to apologize to you.”
The words slip from me with shock and disbelief. “I always wanted a sister.”
“I remember you did,” he says. Like he knows me. Like he ever knew anything about me, so caught up in the volatility of his and my mother’s tumultuous relationship.
Is this some sick joke? I had a family, a half-sister, all the way across the world? It sinks in that he keeps saying, ‘had.’
“What happened to her?” I ask.
“When I was charged for drugs, the first time,” he adds sheepishly, “Elly left with Megan. I didn’t have money for a lawyer or a leg to stand on in court to get custody since I already had the drug charges. I knew fighting for her was impossible. I try to call, to write, but I haven’t heard from them in years.”
“That sounds hard,” I say, my voice tight.
“Sorry. I—ah. I’m not sure what to say other than what I came to say, which is sorry. I’m sorry for being a shitty father. And I’m sorry for your crappy mother. And I’m sorry we ran off when you turned eighteen. And I’m sorry I never got in touch after that.”
The apology should help; it should make me feel better.
Instead, I just feel… empty.
“Are you going to go back?” I ask.
“Yes. I’m going to turn myself in. I just wanted to see you first.”
“I appreciate the gesture, Dad.” I give another tight smile, willing myself to not cry. “I wish you the best of luck. Thank you for coming.”
I stand up, ready to put this behind me. To close this chapter of my life. To go back to my magical life of protection and comfort and a man who cares for me.
I’m ready to say goodbye.
I’m reluctant to give him a hug, but I know it’s the last thing I’ll ever give him.
We embrace and for a moment, I remember the feeling of hugging him.
Then, it’s over.
I watch as the men lead him away. This time, when he leaves me, he at least gives a backwards glance.
CHAPTER 22
Rockwell
Punctual as ever, even after what she’s just been through, she meets me outside the townhouse at noon on the dot. I load her up in my pretty little red BMW convertible, leaving the top down as it’s a beautiful day.
