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I wait for her to continue, not sure I understand what she’s trying to say—I mean, I hope she’s saying that I can sleep next to her. But I’m not going to jump to that conclusion.
“We’ve already crossed the line,” she finally says, meeting my gaze. “And while I don’t think we should be doing it, I can’t stand seeing you walk around sore all day long. It’s not fair. We have a lot of time left here.”
I nod slowly, squashing my smile by biting down on my lip. “Okay.”
“Okay,” she breathes out. “And about tonight...”
“It happened,” I say with a shrug, giving her a reassuring smile. I can see the concern written all over her face. “I’ll never let it get out, okay? I don’t want your career to be tainted in any way, really. Plus, I know I’m the one who instigated all this between us.”
Her brow furrows. “It’s not just you.”
“Well, I’ve been the one to push for it.”
“Cameron, I kissed you tonight. I wanted you to kiss me. It’s not fair for you to take the blame for it all.”
“Yeah... But you said it’s unprofessional.”
“Because it is,” she says flatly. “I don’t kiss my clients. There are plenty of people who cross that line, but I’m just not one of them. I don’t want that kind of reputation.”
“I don’t blame you.” My voice comes out quiet, and I hate the fact that I feel disappointed. I should be excited to be climbing into bed next to Nila, but instead, I’m plagued with the guilt of what I’ve done to her. “I don’t want you to regret what happened—and if you need to be mad, you can be angry with me.”
She shakes her head, her exasperation present. “Why are you so nice? You’re supposed to be some hothead who loses his temper and punches fans. This”—she motions to me—“isn’t that.”
I frown. “I’m sorry? I don’t get why that’s a bad thing. I told you, I don’t have an anger problem. I was taking up for my friend, and I’d do the exact same thing for you.”
“So, I’m a friend?” she asks.
Uh oh.
“We can’t be friends, Cameron,” she continues. “Maybe after this job is done, but right now, we’re just professionals.”
“Really?” I make a face. “But you just said we crossed the line and invited me to sleep in the same bed as you. I think we can toss that out the window.”
Her lips purse. “Okay.”
I nod. “Okay.”
“I’m going to bed.” She turns on her heels, giving me an eyeful of her long legs and round hips.
I watch her walk all the way to the bedroom and close the door, leaving me alone in the living room.
And my head is a mess.
I sit for a few minutes, replaying all the events that led up to this moment. We might’ve had a bit of a rough start, but overall, Nila has gone above and beyond to help me fix this mess I’m in—even going so far as to come with me to an Anger Retreat.
Who does that?
She’s been so persistent and patient with me but puts me in my place when necessary. She doesn’t even seem phased by prickly disposition.
But she’s also contradicting herself, and I don’t even know how I’m supposed to handle it. It’s like she’s warring with herself over the right thing to do … though I suppose that’s not the worst outcome of all this.
What would be worse is if she didn’t have any feelings for me at all.
But clearly, given that she kissed me tonight, that’s not the case.
And that makes me smile.
Maybe I can win Nila over.
