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“Guys … I’m not okay,” I blurt out, my feelings getting the best of me.
“What? What are you talking about? Is it your arm? Did it not heal well? Does it hurt?” Jo asks, her voice laced with concern.
“Is it about your job? Honey, we can fix that. Let me talk to Gianluca and see what we can do. We’ll pull some strings and find you a new job as a freelance makeup artist in no time!” Larisa adds.
“Thank you so much, Larisa. That would be wonderful,” I smile. “But … I wasn’t talking about that. I—I think I did something bad and now I don’t know how to … undo it.”
They huddle closer to me on the white couch, everything about the dresses and wedding accessories completely forgotten.
Both Larisa and Jo can see just how serious I am.
“What happened, honey? Tell us.” Larisa says.
“Guys, two weeks ago, I went to have my cast taken off. And when I did, Evan and I kissed.”
As if on cue, both of them gasp very loudly like they do when they’re watching a particularly twisted episode of Game of Thrones.
They cover their mouths with their hands and stare at me in disbelief.
“Whaaaat? No way!! You two kissed? Why … why didn’t you tell us until now??” Larisa asks me.
“I needed time to process it and … everything else that happened after. Because … it was difficult. It’s difficult talking about it even now. You’ll understand why in a minute.”
Their eyes grow even wider, just as I expected.
“Everything … else? More things happened between you and Evan?” Jo asks.
“Many more things,” I reply. “First of all, you should know that I’m the one who initiated the kiss that day.”
“What?? No way!! Get out of here!!” they react simultaneously, shaking their heads in total disbelief.
“Yes, it’s true. I guess that, for a while now, I’ve started to see Evan in a new light. You know, all these years, he’s been my best friend. And I’ve always seen him as that awkward teenage boy that he used to be. But lately … I started seeing this … incredibly handsome, attractive man. This charming, funny, spectacular man who was … right there. On my couch, bringing me wine and making me laugh. In my bathroom helping me wrap my cast so it wouldn’t get wet. In my kitchen, making me pasta—and then when he had to take off his T-shirt in my kitchen with the pasta because some sauce spilled on him and … I guess I realized how attracted I am to him. I mean … extremely attracted. I could barely stand, I couldn’t take my eyes off him, I couldn’t think about anything else!”
Larisa fans herself with her hand while Jo just grins.
“So, when I went to have my cast removed, I couldn’t resist him anymore. We kissed. And it was … heavenly. Better than anything I could’ve ever imagined. Not only was it electric and passionate but it also felt like … home. Like coming back home after being gone for a very long time. But then—”
“Oh, no. What happened?” Larisa asks.
“Well, right after the kiss, things got very awkward. It was almost as if we didn’t know how to be with each other anymore, just because we kissed. All of a sudden, there was nothing to talk about. All the topics of conversation just disappeared and were replaced by embarrassing silences and silly stares.”
“Oh no. I did not see that coming.”
“Me either!” I reply. “We decided to go to dinner that evening to celebrate my cast coming off and … it was so … cold and unwelcoming. The whole ride there was ridiculous! I felt like I was in the car with a stranger! And that’s when it hit me. Is this what it would be like? Our relationship?”
Larisa and Jo look puzzled as if they don’t necessarily agree with me.
“Emmy, that’s not really true. Don’t you think that you judged things somewhat fast? You kissed once and then went out to dinner. Sure, it was awkward. That kiss and that dinner came after seventeen years of friendship. What were you expecting? You two are not Ryan Gosling and Rachel McAdams in The Notebook! This is real life. Things are different,” Jo says wisely, as usual.
“Well, you might be right. But, in the moment, I didn’t think so. And then, dinner came.”
“Oh, no! What happened at dinner?” they ask me, horrified looks on their faces.
“Well, after he—”
“Ladies,” the stylist’s voice interrupts us. “Would you like to come to the other room and try on the new designs that—”
“Dresses? There are more important things at stake here!! What dresses?” Larisa tells the stylist.
