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Finally, Liam sighed. “All right. I know I don’t look great in this story, but it’s important that you know.”
There was another pause, and Amelia decided that he might be waiting for her to say something.
“I agree. It’s important for me to know because it’ll be important for Grace to know, someday, the story of where she came from. And it’s important for her now to be able to talk about her mother, which is hard for me to do, since there’s a lot I don’t know.”
“I agree. And that’s on me.” Liam sighed once again. “Okay. Grace’s mother is — was — a woman by the name of Cora Matthews. Cora and I weren’t in a relationship, by any means, and that wasn’t something that either of us wanted. We were both clear about that. We had… fun together, and that was all.” Liam winced slightly at the word “fun” and glanced at Amelia, as if to gauge her reaction. Amelia kept her face neutral. There was nothing wrong with Liam having enjoyed casual relationships, especially since it sounded like it had been mutually casual.
It wasn’t even a problem if Liam was having casual relationships now. It wasn’t like Amelia had any claim on his heart. The thought was painful, but Amelia knew it was for the best to face facts. If Liam’s style was casual flings, they would be an even worse match than she’d thought. Amelia hadn’t dated much, but she knew that when she did, she’d want something real and long-term.
“Anyway. Cora and I saw each other off and on for a month or so. I’m ashamed to admit that neither of us knew many personal details about the other. Then, the relationship ended — not in any major way; we just drifted apart. I never heard from her again.”
“Wait.” Amelia had to clarify this. “Never? Not even when she found out she was pregnant?”
“No.” Liam shook his head. “Cora never told me that she was expecting. I had no idea that Grace existed.”
The whole world shifted on its axis. If Liam hadn’t known about Grace, he wasn’t an absentee father anymore. How could he have been present in Grace’s life if he hadn’t known she existed? Sympathy flooded Amelia, replacing the disregard she’d felt before. It wasn’t Liam’s fault that he didn’t know how to raise a two-year-old — he hadn’t been given the chance to find out. Amelia tried to imagine how difficult it must have been for him to learn that he had a daughter and take full custody of her, all as a complete surprise.
“Are you… I mean, I don’t wish to speak ill of the dead, but are you mad at Cora? For not telling you, I mean?”
“Not at all. I can’t blame her for not telling me. I was clear that I wasn’t looking for anything serious and that I wasn’t interested in marriage or kids at all. I imagine she felt that if she told me, I wouldn’t have reacted well — and she was probably right. On top of that, I would have been an absolutely clueless father. You’ve seen how much I struggle to take care of Grace. That would have been even worse a few years ago.”
Amelia shook her head. “Liam, don’t say that. You aren’t clueless. Yes, you still have a lot to learn, but I’ve seen how you care for Grace. And I’ve seen how she looks at you. You might not have been ready to be a father, two months ago or a few weeks ago, but you’re doing a wonderful job now.”
“Thanks to you.”
The words warmed Amelia’s heart, but she shook her head again. “No, thanks to you. You decided to be a father to Grace, and I can see it working.”
Liam inclined his head. “I am trying.”
There was a pause.
“If you don’t mind me asking, though… why did you tell Cora you didn’t want kids or marriage?”
“Because it’s true. Or… it was true. I don’t know.” Liam ran a hand through his hair. “Now that Grace is in my life, I love her, and I can’t imagine being without her. But I always knew I was better off not having a family.”
The affection and sympathy Amelia had been feeling soured slightly. “Because your job is more important?”
“Partially. But also because family is, well, a fickle thing.”
“What do you mean?” Liam had always avoided talking about his family, but this time, he didn’t change the subject. At least, not right away.
“I’ve told you that I was an only child, right?”
“Yes.”
“My parents had me too young. There’s nothing wrong with young parents, but mine were young enough that their parents disowned them when they had me. They moved into a trailer park, because that was all they could afford. My father worked long hours at a steel mill in town, and my mother had several jobs as a maid and a waitress, all cobbled together. They were trying to keep the family afloat, but it was hard. As soon as I was old enough, I got a job, too.”
“How old were you?” Amelia’s voice was hushed.
“When I got my first paper route, seven. I built from there. There aren’t many places that’ll hire a kid, even if they pay under the table, but I found every opportunity I could. Whatever I earned went to my parents, and they spent it — on food and clothes, but also on alcohol and lottery tickets. My parents loved me, but they also resented me, I think. It was because of me that they had to live the life they did.”
“No.” Amelia shook her head firmly. “It wasn’t your fault for being born.” As if of its own accord, her hand reached across the sofa and rested on Liam’s. His hand shifted beneath hers and, for a moment, she thought he was pulling away. But then he rested his warm, large palm against hers and threaded his fingers between hers.
“I know that,” he said. “And I think my parents do, too. But it was a difficult childhood. That’s when I realized that love isn’t enough. Financial security means a good job, a warm house, enough food, and new clothes when they’re needed. I knew I needed to prioritize financial security over family, because I couldn’t put another child through life in a home where they felt guilty just for being alive.”
Amelia squeezed Liam’s hand. Her heart went out to the little boy he’d been, sitting in a trailer somewhere feeling responsible for his family’s struggles.
“What happened next?” she asked softly. “I mean, how did you go from being a little boy in a struggling family to” — she made a sweeping gesture meant to encompass the penthouse and Liam himself — “this?”
