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“Yeah, she’s precious until she’s waking you up at two a.m. because she wants a midnight snack.”
Jem grins at me. “Oh I bet. The sleep deprivation is probably brutal. A couple of girlfriends had babies recently and they nap when their babies nap religiously if they can.”
“Yeah. I tried that, but ended up doing all the things I couldn’t do when she was awake and wanting to be held.”
“And you don’t have anyone…” She trails off.
“No. Just me and Audra.”
“If I’m being too nosy, you can absolutely tell me to mind my own beeswax, but is her father involved at all?”
The air in my lungs turns to concrete, the weight of it sitting heavy on my chest, and it takes a second for me to remember how to breathe.
“No. He’s not involved.”
Sympathy shines in Jem’s eyes. “I’m sorry. That must be hard.”
I hate the pity I see in her gaze. Would it be nice to have some help? Of course it would, but not at the expense of mine or my daughter’s safety and health. And that’s exactly what would happen if I had stayed. I’d be a punching bag at best or dead at worst. Thinking about what he could have done to Audra is too terrifying to even contemplate.
“It’s okay. It’s all either of us have known.”
Jem nods. And as if realizing I don’t need or want her pity, her expression clears.
Audra gets a grip on Jem’s hair and tugs. “Oh shit. Here let me.” I untangle my daughter’s fingers just as Audra leans forward and starts to root at Jem’s cheek.
Instead of being grossed out, Jem laughs. “Oh gosh, that tickles.”
A blush works its way across my cheeks, the heat of my face enough to make the bags under my eyes sweat. “I’m sorry. She’s hungry and looking for lunch.”
“She’s fine. You can nurse her while we finish chatting.”
“Um.” I don’t know how I feel about whipping out a boob while she’s sitting on the couch right next to me.
“I can leave if it makes you uncomfortable, but I wanted to chat a bit more if that’s okay with you. I’ll be honest, I haven’t made a whole lot of friends since moving here, and I miss my girlfriends something fierce.”
“No. It’s fine. Just give me a second.” I drape the swaddle cloth over my shoulder and unhook my tank and bra, the material of the blanket is light enough that it gives me some privacy while Audra won’t get too hot under there.
Jem turns back around. “To make you more comfortable — while you do something that’s completely natural and beautiful — why don’t I tell you about how I whipped my shirt off right in front of Boone after being caught in a snowstorm — before we started dating each other?”
My eyes about bug out of my head. “What?”
Jem grins at me. “Yeah. I was on my way back to the town we used to live in when a snowstorm hit and I had to pull off to the side of the road. I almost froze to death when I decided to try and hoof it back to town when my car ran out of gas. Stumbled onto Boone’s cabin and made myself right at home, getting nearly naked in front of the fire. In my defense, I thought my tits were about to freeze right off, and he did offer me dry, warm clothes to change into.”
“Holy shit. What did Boone do?”
“He turned around like the gentleman that he is. I about swooned right there in his cabin’s living room.”
I smile slightly at the love in her tone and try to ignore the jealous pang in my chest.
After clearing my throat, I ask, “Where did you move here from?”
“Felt, Idaho. Landed there after finishing high school. Managed a bakery for years before the fateful tit show. Boone and I started seeing each other, and when it got serious, I moved here to open my coffee shop.”
“Did Boone live in Felt too?”
Jem nods. “He did. He was a park ranger up there. His dad manages the one down here, and when he had trouble keeping rangers on staff, asked Boone to move home and help him out.”
Harlan said that he was born and raised here, it makes sense that his brothers would be too. I file away the information that Boone didn’t always live here.
