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I would rather have my heart ripped right out of my chest by the woman in front of me than make her cry again. It’s a damning realization. There’s no way out of this without someone I care about getting hurt. But I’d rather it be me than her.
I stroke her cheek and press my lips to hers. “Baby, look at me.”
She opens her eyes, and the fear in them makes my heart feel like it’s been put in a vise.
So I give her as much honesty as I can. “This should feel like a mistake, but it doesn’t. At all.” It feels exactly right. And that scares the shit out of me. I kiss her softly, slowly, but break it before we can get too carried away. “Bedtime, Princess. You have a meeting with your group in less than eight hours, and we both know you’re grouchy when you’ve had less than six hours of sleep.”
“I knew I shouldn’t have given you access to my calendar,” she gripes.
She did that when she started taking care of Postie and Malone. She turns off the lights, except for the lamp on her nightstand. I pull back the sheets, and she climbs in, me following. I set the timer on my watch for an hour, turn off the light, and stretch out on my back. Aurora snuggles into my side, head on my chest, hand resting lightly over my heart.
I curl my fingers around it, in case she gets any ideas.
She kisses the back of my hand, then settles her cheek on my chest. “Hollis?”
“Yes, Princess?”
“Your hand smells like my pussy.”
I laugh. “I know.”
“You’re not going to wash it, are you?”
“No.”
“You’re a little dirty, aren’t you?”
I smile in the dark. “Yeah.”
“Good. Me too.” She shifts around, and her lips find the edge of my jaw, working their way up to my lips. “Thanks for finger-fucking me against my door.”
“You’re welcome. Now go to sleep.”
“Okay.” She settles against my chest again and a few seconds later whispers, so quietly I almost don’t catch it, “Old man.”
“You’re pushing it, Princess. G’night.”
“I know. G’night, Hollis.”
She throws her leg over mine and tries to free her hand, but I thread our fingers together. It doesn’t take her long to fall asleep. I lie there for a long while, staring at the ceiling, listening to her steady breathing, wishing I could see into the future and know for sure that this path is the right one. This doesn’t feel fleeting, but I’ve been wrong before. And there’s so much at stake for both of us. But I can’t stay away anymore.
CHAPTER 23
HAMMER
“Oh, my God! Yes!” I pump my fist in the air, then realize exactly what this means. “Oh, shit.”
“What’s going on?” Rix asks. “First, you looked thrilled, now you look like someone stole your favorite vibrator.”
“Ha ha. Hollis has the go-ahead to travel with the team again.”
“Which is great for his morale but not so great for fingerbangs and make-out sessions,” she finishes.
I love that she understands, and that I can tell her things. And even if she tells Tristan, he’s good at keeping his mouth shut.
There was a zero-percent chance that I could keep what happened to myself. Plus, my buoyant mood was a real tipoff. And Hollis must have gone to the twenty-four-hour grocery store at stupid o’clock in the morning, because he left my favorite muffins on the counter. Without a note. But still. It was sweet.
I flop down on the couch. “I was kind of hoping we’d have four days with no one around so I could finally get my hands on his cock.”
