Page 219 of Dirty Pleasures

I desperately missed him.

And the world just keeps fucking going on?

I looked at my hand and blinked at the joint between my fingers.

What?

So in shock, I didn’t even know where the joint came from that lay next to the tub.

Did I pick this up? Who gave it to me?

Regardless, I studied the neatly rolled joint. My fingers trembled slightly.

I turned to the right and saw a lighter.

Who brought that here?

Kaz watched me.

Swallowing, I grabbed the lighter, brought it to the joint’s end, lit it, and inhaled deeply, sucking until smoke filled my lungs.

That’s better. . .maybe. . .

I blinked and inhaled more over and over.

And Kaz studied me, saying nothing.

What is he thinking? Does he know that I am losing my mind?

Silent, he ran his hand through his wet hair.

Of course he knows I’m losing it. The only person that knows me better than Max is my lion.

The more I smoked, the more the space spun slightly around me.

I shivered and glanced to my left.

A glass of dark rum rested on the other side of the tub.

When did that get here?

I widened my eyes.

I’m losing moments.

I blinked several times.

Get it together. You can’t let Lunita rise up and cause more messed up things to happen tonight.

I picked up the glass of rum.

But. . .this will help.

In between puffs, I took a sip and welcomed the liquid burning down my throat.

Yes. I need to be numb.

I leaned back against the tub with the joint between my fingers.

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