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He's pale, head to the side, chest covered in blood….
"I-I…I can't, Snake, please, I can't…."I sob, panic hitting me hard. "I-I'm a NICU nurse."
He squeezes my shoulder, and a voice over a phone echoes near me, "Before that, you were the best ER nurse at Huntersville Hospital. Don't think of this as the love of your life, darling. He's just another patient."
Quinn's dad, Dr. Sanders, a man I looked up to, is on the phone.
I take deep breaths and squeeze my eyes shut, knowing he's right. Heck, even in New York, I ended up in the ER several times.
I've got this; it's not Lucas, just another patient.
I repeat the mantra several times, trying to block out the screams and cries. I open my eyes and quickly lift up Lucas's shirt, refusing to look at his face, my nursing side coming out.
I lost our daughter, I won't lose him, too. I refuse.
I inspect the deep gash, blood pouring out of it, staining his tattooed skin.
"It's deep; the tear is roughly 8cm wide, 6cm thick. It looks like the worst of it was when the knife was removed when he rolled off her."
Dr. Sanders praises me as Breaker holds the phone near my ear. "That's it, Kennedy. You've got this. Tell me what you need to do first. Walk me through it like you would during a shift, look around you, find your triage…."
I bite my bottom lip and look around the room. Aunt Shelly is barely standing, Sniper has a hold of a crying Lola, while Crow is still trying to fight his way through, four more brothers holding him down. It's loud, too loud….
My head spins as I try to concentrate andI rasp, "I need to do a local wound exploration."
"Yes, tell me what you feel, Kennedy. Walk me through it as you go along,"he encourages.
I take a deep breath, looking at the wound, then the floor and everyone around, and I state, "We-we need to move him to his medical room. I need equipment to explore his wound, determine the peritoneal penetration, and ensure there has been no violation of the anterior rectus fascia."
He praises me again while the brothers look at me like I have two heads. Snake's eyes are wide, but I ignore them and quickly pack the wound with the gauze Sarah provided. Smokey, Tech, and Snake all grab hold of Lucas, picking him up. I run ahead of them. Quinn is already holding the door open for me, and tears run down her face. I quickly run to the sink scrub as I say, "I'm going to need an assistant."
"I've got your back, darling,"Sniper announces and scrubs up beside me. My heart pounding, I ask, "Who has Lola?"
He smiles and states, "My dad."I nod, picking underneath my nails.
"I shouldn't have tackled her,"I whisper as soon as I've finished scrubbing my hands raw.
Sarah places clean gloves on me before she grips my cheeks and says, "I would have done the same. You two have been through so much, and your only focus was a woman running toward your man with a knife. Who he is and what he can do flew out the window."
I nod, take a deep breath, and call out, "Dr. Sanders?"
He replies, "I'm here, darling, every step of the way."
I nod to Breaker, who has the phone gripped in his hands, concern etching his features. He stays close but not close enough to get in the way.
I step up to Lucas who now has an oxygen mask on and recite, "Anesthetic, Sniper,"and he nods, giving me the needle someone has already prepped, and I inject the area. Sarah and Snake stand in the corner while Dr Sanders reminds me of my nursing skills.
"Ok, Nurse Gray, first step: you need to connect a warm bag of lavage solution to a catheter with IV tubing, and allow the fluid to flow into the peritoneal cavity to determine the peritoneal penetration. You've got this, darling; you've done it before with me,"he says, and I take a deep breath. I look at Lucas's face just once before I grab the IV, and pray I don't mess up.
An hour later, I'm sitting on the floor near the back wall, my eyes firmly on Lucas's form as he sleeps, my hands covered in his blood. The knife didn't go deep; the testing from the DPL confirmed no damage, and I managed to stitch him back up.
He was lucky, no thanks to me….
I blink several times, my tears falling unabated. I know him; I know he can defend himself; I know he can fight, and getting that knife off her would have been child's play for him. Yet, at that moment, seeing her run at him with a knife, my mind went blank, and my body moved before Lola could grab hold of me.
I sniffle as the door to the medical room opens, and Crow walks in. His eyes go to his son, concern etching his features before he looks my way, and we make eye contact. My emotions get the better of me, and I sob.
He runs my way, kneels, cups my cheeks, and says, "You did good, darling."
