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“It’s okay. They aren’t strong enough to get through my shield. It’s Fae powered, not witch magic.” She smirks at me and keeps moving, dragging me along with her.
“You figured out how to combine them? That’s fantastic. I know you were frustrated when Trevan suggested it before.” Her face scrunches for a minute, then relaxes. I hit a nerve, discussing our time in the Fae realm. I shouldn’t be here with her right now. It should be one of the others.
“I’m sorry,” I say, trying to pull my hand from hers. “I shouldn’t have come with you.”
She stops in the middle of the alley, refusing to let go of my hand. “Why? What did I do to make you think you aren’t enough?”
“You didn’t do anything. It’s me. I’m just a human. I can’t protect you, or myself. There’s nothing I can do to help you win this battle with Amber.”
“Then why did you volunteer to come with me for this?” She stares at me, forcing me to consider my actions.
“Because you need someone to help you focus,” I say, not understanding what she’s trying to tell me.
“And you felt like you were the best person to help me focus?” She’s leading this conversation somewhere and I’m not sure I like it.
“Yeah. We’ve done this maneuver so many times, and I was always the one who helped you concentrate and focus.” I feel like I’m defending myself against something, but I can’t figure out what.
“If you are the best person to help me focus, then that means you’re not useless or less than just because you’re human. Now you have to admit that those thoughts may not have been your own.”
GARNET
This is clearly not the time or place for us to have this out, but here we are. I don’t want to fight with James, because I’m not sure I can stop him from running off if he decides to. The thought of losing him again hurts, and I don’t know if I’ll be able to walk away this time.
“What do you mean, they weren’t my thoughts?” he asks, confusion crinkling his brow.
“I mean, Amber got in our heads. She needed to push us apart to weaken me. It wasn’t just you. She got to me as well. But they wouldn’t let her win.” I gesture back to the door we came out of.
“So, you never thought I was less because I’m human?” he asks. I wish he hadn’t, but I can’t ignore the question hanging between us.
“I’ve never thought you were less. I have, however, tried to come up with ways to protect you because you’re human. Not because you’re less capable or less strong, but because you don’t have the same natural defenses as the rest of us.”
“But that’s what I’m talking about. That’s what makes me less,” he insists. I shake my head.
“We really don’t have time for this right now,” I say, shooting purple magic at one of the witches who’s trying to sneak up behind us. “I need to detonate and take these bitches out. Can we come back to this conversation after?”
I don’t care if he says yes or no; we will discuss this later. I will make sure of it. I can’t let it go, not when I know he still loves me. I have no idea if our bond can be repaired or not, but I don’t care. I want James to be part of my family, and I’m not giving up on him yet.
“Sure, sorry,” he offers and dips his head. I want to scream at how submissive he’s being right now, but there’s no time to react. I have to focus on what’s happening right now, or our people are goners.
We lead the witches out into the street in front of Midnight, where four more groups ambush us. I pretend to be shocked, but really, I’m thrilled. They’ve clumped up better than I could have planned. It should be easy to detonate myself and take them all out. I just have to focus.
As the witches surround us, I can feel James’ nerves, even without a mate bond. “It’s okay; this is all going according to plan. Just act scared,” I whisper to him, not letting go of his hand.
“That’ll be pretty easy,” he responds with a slight chuckle. “You need to focus and stay grounded.”
I nod at his recommendation. I will do what I have to, then we’ll get back to our conversation. I take a deep breath and close my eyes. I hear his gasp and know that I must be starting to glow. “Close your eyes, James.” I don’t look at him, keeping my eyes closed tightly and focusing on the point where our hands meet.
He was right; it had to be him to come with me. No one else could make me feel this grounded or focused. I hate admitting that, but at least I didn’t say it out loud. I feel the magic swell around me, growing and pulsing with its desire to be set free.
James gasps again as the magic pulses. One more deep breath, then I push the blast out around us, targeting each group of witches that surrounds us. I don’t want to kill them, but I can’t hold the magic back. I open my eyes to see puddles of muck where each witch had been standing.
Shock takes hold, and I’m weighted down with so much guilt for the lives my magic has taken. My breath hitches and I start to collapse. Strong arms hold me tightly to a broad chest. James. James is here with me. Tears stream down my cheeks.
“Garnet, look at me,” he encourages. I shake my head. I can’t look at him. If I do, I’ll see the disappointment and fear in his eyes. There’s no way he could still love me after what I’ve just done.
James turns me to face him and lifts my chin, so our eyes meet. “You did what you had to in order to protect all of us. It’s not your fault that your magic did more than knock them out. I know you weren’t trying to kill anyone. This is Amber’s fault, not yours.”
I want to believe him, but I’m not sure that I can. How could my magic do this if it wasn’t my intention? I shake my head again and he stops me, one hand on either side of my face, forcing me to look at him. Our eyes meet, and my heart jumps in my chest. James presses his lips to mine, kissing me so tenderly, so sweetly, that I can almost forget the gaping hole in my heart from where our bond used to be.
