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“Now who’s showing their insecurity?”
“No,” I shrug, “not at all. When men play power games, women are often the spoils. Part of the loot. Trappings and tokens.”
“The don’s ‘council of war’ was mainly about how the raid must have come from the same place as the slayings of Gianni and Paulo Crespi.”
The blood drains from my face. All my breath is gone.
CHAPTER THIRTY-SIX
As calm as I can keep my voice, I say, “Sounds unlikely.”
My timing doesn’t falter and and I’m amazed that I get the right tone in my voice, but I feel like I’ve stumbled in the dark. Trying to recover, I rib him. “And you didn’t talk about me at all?”
He looks at me for a cool second. Of all three brothers, Carlo is the one I’m least likely to fool. My heart judders in the fraction of a second that he searches my eyes.
After a slow blink, he says, “But you said, ‘no.’ Why?”
I pull closer to him, relieved that the moment passed. “Because that’s not why I wanted to stay with you.” I hold his face as I look into his eyes. “Carlo, I gave myself to you. First. I’m yours, Carlo.” He begins to rise along my back.
I take hold of him. “That was my first time. I saved it for you, and I trusted you with it.”
“That wasn’t your first time for all the things we did.”
“Are we ready to open up and exchange all of our secrets, Carlo?”
He says, Yes. And he sounds utterly confident. But still I catch one tremor in his jaw.
“Alright, then,” I tell him. His eyes stay steady, but I can see he’s being evasive. There’s something he wants to keep hidden. What’s the secret he’s afraid to let out?
“We will,” I tell him. “We’ll share all of our secrets.” His eyes glow. “But not now.”
Reluctant, he nods. Then, “I want something with you that the other two don’t have. I know you’re going to share everything else with both of them. I know. It’s okay. Better than okay, in fact. But I want something that’s just mine.”
I know Carlo well enough to be sure that he’s not needy. He’s strategic. He wants something, apart from being the first and taking my virginity, he wants a bond between us. And I want it, too. I guess he’s right about that.
I already have a bond with Bruno. And in the ballroom we were comrades in battle.
With Alessio, although I wouldn’t say that we were bonded, we certainly have a strong connection.
I want something with Carlo. He may be the youngest, but he has a really special way of seeing things. Like he sees patterns in random events. And not like conspiracy theories. Carlo thinks so strategically, he’s practically a visionary. And he’s also the hardest to reach of all three men.
“Okay, Carlo. I love that idea, too. Sharing with you. Something that’s just special to us.” His head lowers and his eyes shine. I’m right. I read him right. “We’ll share some secrets. Family secrets. But it has to go both ways. I ask you a question, you ask me one.”
“Yes.”
“So.” I take a breath, “Where’s your mother?”
“OH!” His face is playful, but in a dangerous way. Like a cat who’s found a way to reach a nice, big fish. “No lube, right, no teasing massage or even some whispers? Hard as a nightstick and straight in. No protection.”
I try to suppress a laugh. I don’t do too well. “Sorry.”
“It’s okay.” He disarms me with a kiss. Half sweet, half sinful. I really need to keep my wits about me, and he makes them ready to float off into the night. Gently, he says, “I just wasn’t ready.”
I realize that answering the question could be painful for him. And there is definitely something very strange about this family. I tell him, “You don’t have to answer.”
“She went away when I was ten. Mama has a fabulous villa on an island in the Bay of Naples. She lives in comfort and splendor, and keeps herself an unreachable distance away.”
“Have you been there?” Even as I ask him, I realize, he told me the story, and he threw me off the scent at the same time. She went away…
