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I should have felt self conscious, laid before him completely naked, baring every scar I now owned and showing him my too thin, almost skeletal frame, but I didn’t because of him – because of the way he was looking at me. He made me feel like I really was perfect in that moment. He made me feel like I was everything he wanted, and I never expected to feel that way ever again.
“Quit staring at me and take off those damn shorts,” I told him playfully.
“Yes ma’am,” he quipped with a mock salute. Thankfully, he also stood and shucked off the basketball shorts he had worn to bed, then he was back over me, caging me in again, only this time he was naked and I was so ready for whatever he wanted to give.
I moaned in delight as he turned his attention to my breasts, clamping my right nipple in his mouth and nipping it slightly with his teeth. He alternated between them, the combination of pleasure and that little hint of pain once again making me writhe beneath him with desperation for more.
“Did I tell you I’m a breast man?” he asked as he sat back and looked to me with way too much calm. He was straddling my thighs and I could feel the weight of his unmistakable hardness, as desperate for more as my whole body, it seemed, pressed against my aching core.
“Kailan, please!” I cried. I was like a wild animal, unable to control the way my body moved beneath him, desperate for his touch and so much more. There was a word, I was sure – wanton. That was it, right? I was a wanton woman in that moment.
“Sshh darlin’. I’m here,” he soothed. He kissed me chastely a few times as he fumbled to grab his shorts which he’d thrown onto the edge of the bed. I wondered what the heck he was doing until he pulled a condom from the pocket.
“That was very presumptuous of you,” I told him between kisses.
“Always prepared,” he told me with a wink, and I couldn’t help but laugh. He was too damned cute and how could I be mad? It wasn’t like the sexual tension between us all hadn’t been building.
“Just hurry up, boy scout,” I laughed.
“So bossy,” he uttered as he quickly got the condom on. He looked to me assessingly for a moment and I knew he was worried I’d have second thoughts. I nodded to reassure him there was no damned way, and he winked again. “I’m gonna go slow at first, okay?”
I nodded, but there were no nerves from me. I wanted this. I wanted Kailan. I was surer of that than I had been of anything else for months, maybe even years. These men were made for me and I knew it. I belonged with them.
He crawled up the bed over my body, his eyes locked on mine and I rubbed my hands up and down his perfect abs, appreciating the beauty of his perfectly sculpted body. I reminded myself to go and watch the guys work out in the gym they all spent so long in, sometime very soon.
I could feel scars on his body too, jagged long lines, but there wasn’t enough light to see them. I recalled Nick telling me Kailan had taken shrapnel in the explosion, not to mention the weeks of torture they had all endured. The guys were right when they said we were all messed up in our own ways. Maybe that’s why we fit together so well. Maybe it was all of our broken parts that just clicked into place together.
Kailan started to kiss and nibble his way down my torso again. It felt both amazing and torturous, my own desperation for more, now at the point where it was almost unbearable. Just when more protests and much more begging was about to pour from me, his touch moved lower – to exactly where I so badly needed it, brushing over my core, and then delving deeper to toy with the bundle of nerves that were throbbing with my need for his touch. I was lost to pleasure as he skillfully brought me to the brink. I was so close, about to crash down over that edge that I had been chasing since Kailan pulled me into his lap downstairs, but I needed more still.
“Kailan!” I panted. “Now…please. I…I want to feel you inside me…please!” I was out of breath and dizzy with how close I was to finding my pleasure, but I wanted this. I wanted Kailan and I to be so close we were like one person the first time he made me climax. I wanted us to share the perfect moment we had come to.
“No more begging, darlin’. I’ll always give you what you need,” he told me huskily. His eyes locked with mine as he lined himself up with my core. The stretch was unexpected as he slid into me gently. I hadn’t caught a peek at him when he got naked, but it was obvious to me now he was big, and thick, so thick.
“Okay?” he asked as he paused and met my eyes again.
“Don’t stop!” I cried. He was patient, much more patient than I felt as he pushed forward little by little, going slow just as he’d told me he would.
Then he was all of the way in and I was fuller than I had ever felt in my life. I needed him to move, and finally he did, still keeping each thrust slow and steady, and looking at my face continuously to ensure I wasn’t in pain. But as he started to move in a slightly faster rhythm, pain was the last thing I was thinking of. The pleasure within me was already building right up, getting me closer and closer to that edge once again. I wrapped my legs tight around his waist, locking my feet, hoping it would pull him deeper inside of me and it did. I cried out in utter bliss, riding that edge and drowning in pleasure. I clung even tighter to him, my hands holding his huge shoulders, my nails digging into his skin as I pleaded nonsensically for more.
“You gonna come for me, Evie?” Kailan rasped against my ear.
“Y-yes!” I cried as I clung to him even tighter and buried my face against his shoulder. I crashed over that edge then, lost to the sensations that were coursing through me. It was almost overwhelming, but Kailan held onto me as he found his own release and it was just what I needed. I felt like I was floating away and he was the only thing tethering me to the earth.
I could barely see straight as I opened my eyes and met Kailan’s gaze. The pleasure was almost too much, but at the same time I was happy for it to go on forever.
“You okay?” he panted.
“So totally okay,” I nodded, knowing I must look hilarious with the goofy smile that was on my face.
“I didn’t think you could ever look sexier than you did naked on your bed, but I think this post sex look is the winner,” he told me as he ran a hand through my, no doubt, wild hair.
“Quit teasing me!” I whined as I hit out at him.
“Not teasing, darlin’. You look hot as fuck right now,” he told me, making me smile even more goofily.
“Kailan, that was…” I paused, “…I have no words.”
“That bad, huh?” he teased and I hit out at his shoulder again.
