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Sawyer. I didn’t often imagine physical violence, but I did when it came to that one. He was off his rocker; he didn’t know when to quit. I loved Sabrina; I didn’t kill her. Her note blaming me was…not fair. She was the one who was cheating, not me. I was just the one who said maybe we needed a break while she figured out what she wanted. Not once did I ever suspect she wouldn’t come back to me. I thought her fling with Travis was just that, a fling, nothing meaningful.
I was not alone as I exited the lecture hall. Sawyer was on my heel, following me out of the building and into the warm light of day. I stuck my hands in my pockets, knowing that if I let them hang by my side, they might not remain there for long. Sawyer’s face needed a few hits, I think.
A strong hand grabbed my shoulder, slowing my speed but not stopping me. Sawyer wanted us to go at his pace, and I shot him a glare.
“You know,” Sawyer spoke, and I noticed his bottom lip was nearly healed, “I find myself wondering why the hell Ash likes you so much. Why she’s willing to go against me, all to protect you. I mean, look at you, and look at me. There’s no competition. Based on looks alone, I should have her.”
I tried to shake his hand off but failed. His fingers tightened on my shoulder, and I refused to wince at the pain. He could throw me to the ground and beat on me, and I would do my best not to give him any satisfaction.
“So then I wondered what you’ve told her. Does she know the whole truth? Does she know why you and Sabrina were broken up?” Sawyer’s green eyes sparkled in the sun, but their brightness was shadowed by his dark intent. “Does she know how much of a pathetic loser you were, always waiting for my sister to come back to you, no matter how many times she told you it was over?”
Sawyer had it wrong. The breakups were mutual. She never broke up with me. We always agreed to separate, and she always came back to me.
Except for that last time, when she’d hung herself. There was no coming back to me after that.
“Try telling her whatever you want,” I said, glaring at him. “But I have a feeling she won’t believe a word you say. Look at you, still trying to make my life miserable. Who’s the pathetic loser now, huh?” My words must’ve startled him, for his grip on my shoulder loosened enough that I was able to break free and speed up my pace.
Sawyer was growling, practically foaming at the mouth by the time he caught up to me. “She doesn’t need to believe me. She just needs to doubt you.”
Doubting me…it wasn’t something I wanted Ash to do. I wanted her on my side, one hundred percent. I didn’t want her to wonder whether things between Sabrina and I were rocky. And Travis? I didn’t care if she knew of his involvement, but…would she think of me any differently if she did?
“I’m going to make her doubt you, and then I’m going to take her away from you,” Sawyer said. He gave me a lopsided smile before walking by, picking up his pace. I slowed down, not wanting to walk with him.
I watched him go, feeling alone amongst the crowd of students around me on the sidewalk. My arm started to itch. My cut had mostly healed up, a scar where it was. I typically wore long sleeves or jackets when I went to class, no matter how warm it was outside; I didn’t need anyone else to see it and ask me about it. It was bad enough I had Will texting me constantly.
Maybe it was foolish, but I had faith in Ash. I didn’t think she’d fall for whatever it was Sawyer wanted to do. And, anyway, I saw it as his last hurrah, one final push to try to tear Ash from me. Perhaps I’d grown thicker skin, but it didn’t feel like he was really putting his all behind it lately. Even the other students’ snickers and sneers had grown further between, and Ash always took care of whatever was on the outside door without showing me what it was.
I wouldn’t go so far as to say I was happy, but I was content. Ash was what I needed, and I’d be damned if I let Sawyer get between us. I had to figure out what was bugging her.
When I returned to the dorm room after my classes, I found Ash was in the shower. I set my bag down and ran a hand through my hair, wondering what I’d say to her, how I’d say it. If something was on her mind, if something was bugging her, I had to know what it was. I didn’t like her being so distant.
It wasn’t long before I heard a thud in the bathroom, and I knew it wasn’t a good sound. My feet drew me to the bathroom door, and I knocked, saying, “Ash? You okay?” My blood ran cold when I imagined finding her how she found me…I couldn’t remember that night much, but I could only imagine how awful it’d been. Really, I owed my life to her.
I received no answer, and so I tentatively reached for the door handle. It was locked, of course.
“Ash,” I spoke her name a little louder, pounding on the door. I supposed I could’ve looked for something to try to pick the lock, since it was just a normal handle, the kind you’d only need something sharp for, but I needn’t have worried, for suddenly the door open, and Ash stood there, sopping wet and wearing nothing but a towel.
She’d taken off her splint, and she used both hands to hold the towel against her chest. The shower was still running behind her, and yet I could tell she was gone.
“I fell,” she whispered. “I don’t fall.”
I didn’t know what to do, if I should help her dry off or get her clothes. I knew if I moved an inch, I might see a bit more skin than I should; she only held the towel against her front. The rest of her was all bare.
But…wait. Her words didn’t make sense.
“You said you hurt your thumb by falling,” I said, watching as she slowly lifted her head, those beautiful grey eyes meeting mine.
Her lips parted ever so measuredly, and she whispered, “I lied. I’m a liar, Declan. I’m a liar, just like the rest. I try to be, but it’s hard…” Her gaze fell, and maybe it was the water from the shower, or maybe it was actual tears, but her eyes seemed too watery. “I’ve lied to everyone. No one knows.”
I had no idea what she was trying to say, but I knew she wasn’t acting like herself. She was out of it, and I knew I had to help her. She helped me when I needed it; now it was my turn to return the favor. For her…I’d do anything.
“Come on,” I said, reaching for her shoulders, but she jerked back from me, eyes widening.
“I’m a liar, Declan,” she said it more firmly this time, as if I hadn’t heard her the first time.
Since she clearly wouldn’t move from that spot, dripping onto the tile below, I crossed my arms, giving her an unimpressed expression. “Okay,” I said, playing into her game, “what have you lied about?”
“I can’t tell you.”
