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I had a sick feeling we all knew the answer to this question.
“Maddon Judd,” Zane confirmed.
“And we just let Nebraska walk out of here when she has confidential material on your op and intel on a BC?” My observation was unnecessary seeing as we’d done just that not even ten minutes ago.
I watched the vessel running up the side of Zane’s neck pulse before his eyes cut to Theo.
“Once upon a time I was a lot like you were before you left the CIA. Guided by principle, blinded by ideology, and the knowledge I was on the right side of wrong. It took you less time than it did me to realize there is no such thing as black and white.” Zane pulled his gaze from Theo and locked eyes with his brother, looking like he was about to admit a mortal sin. “I was riding the high of mission success, the adrenaline that fuels the next battle, and all the bullshit that comes with being told you’re the best. I ate that shit up, rode it all high and mighty. I thought I knew best, I thought I was the best, then I was taught differently. And the person who delivered that lesson was a woman called Ann Robinson. She went by the pseudo, Pidgeon.”
“Honey trap?” Cash asked.
A scary smile formed until both Zane’s dimples came out. That was never a good sign. But I didn’t understand why that smile was directed at me.
“Even drenched in sweat, covered in dust and grime, fully kitted out, combat ready, the woman was gorgeous. She had some years on me, and not a few of them, but still she turned every man’s eye, including mine. It was the pool-blue eyes that held a man captive.”
Pool-blue eyes.
Suddenly the sick that had gathered in my stomach started to churn.
“Are you saying…” I trailed off not knowing exactly what Zane was implying, just that I didn’t like where I thought he was going.
“That Ann Robinson is Nebraska Michaels’ mother, yeah that’s what I’m saying. Though I wasn’t sure until Nebraska walked into the room. There’s nothing in Ann Robinson’s file that indicates she had a child and Nebraska’s birth certificate lists a Jane Smith as her mother. But Nebraska’s a spitting image of Pidge, all the way down to how she carries herself. It was like going back in time watching Ann walk into the TOC.”
Oh yeah, that sick was churning and all those dirty thoughts I had about Nebraska suddenly felt wrong. Very, very wrong knowing my boss had fucked her mother.
“You said Charlie adopted her. Who’s her biological father?”
Zane’s dimples depressed deeper and his hands came out of his lap, palms facing the table in a stop gesture.
“Not me.”
Well thank fuck for that or me throwing up would be the least of our worries. Zane’s wife Ivy would likely dismember him.
“So she fucked you for information?” Theo inquired.
“The woman fucked me, alright, but I never touched her.”
Why was that such a relief?
“I don’t get it then,” Kira put in.
“There are many ways to fuck a man without having to bed down. The greatest lie ever told was that women are the weaker sex. Men perpetuated the lie. But women, see, they’re smart enough to allow the propaganda to be persevered. Generation after generation the lie is told and women are underestimated. When the truth is women are far more cunning than men. Sly in all the ways they fuck with a man’s head. It’s not about physical strength; it’s a power dynamic that men have very little chance of winning. Pidge was the last woman I underestimated. I would’ve seen a honey trap a mile away. I would’ve been prepared for that. Pidge was smart. She observed me, got to know me, asked questions, then she used my weakness against me. I handed her everything she needed to know in less than a week kicking back at night around a fire, tossin’ back a few beers. Stroking my ego, making me feel needed, placing me in the one role she knew I couldn’t turn away from. One night in some great admission she told me she was scared. This was her first time out in the field with a team. She was nervous. Sun City was mostly a shanty town. The residents lived in extreme poverty, run by gangs. It was hella dangerous but for a woman it was worse. But she didn’t want to be viewed as fragile or a strap so she did her part even if she was scared to death. She told me in a way that made me believe she trusted me to keep her safe. I became her protector. And once that happened, and she cemented that bond, I trusted her with more than I should’ve.”
Holy fuck.
Kira’s fingers were flying across her keyboard.
I didn’t wait for her to find what she was looking for before I asked, “Ann was the case officer?”
“That’s what we were told.”
“But she wasn’t?”
“Nope. She wasn’t a blue badge, she was a contractor.”
“What’d she get out of you?” Cash asked.
“Not what. It’s where she landed me and Dutch.”
