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“I told you I’d ruin you and I will. I’ve already done it once to a beautiful woman with a soft heart. All she did was love me and I fucking killed her.”
“Wilson—”
“Answer the question now, princess,” I seethed and Atlee jerked back. “You want this to be permanent? Do you really want to take your chances on a man who couldn’t give his wife what she needed to stay alive? Because that’s who I am.”
“Wilson.” She tried again.
That soft voice pleading for me to listen tore me wide open.
I’d heard that tone before.
“Open your goddamn eyes, Atlee. I’ll fail you, too.”
Suddenly she pushed away from the chair and her shoulders snapped back. Shock turned into vibrating anger.
Attitude and fury suffused her tone when she fumed, “I don’t know who the fuck you think you’re talking to, Wilson McCray. But obviously you’ve got me confused with someone who will stand here and allow you to speak to them like they’re stupid. I’m sorry about your wife. That’s tragic. There are not enough words to express how horrible.”
“Atlee—”
“Oh no, you had your turn. Now it’s mine. You don’t get to use your wife’s death as a weapon to push me away. What’d you think, you’d drop that bomb on me and I’d run away? Is that what you want? You thought it would be easier—”
“Easier,” I spat. “You think me admitting I was a shit husband would be easier than breaking up with you?”
Fucking Christ, my chest felt like it was going to explode.
“No, I think you needed to tell me about your wife but instead of talking to me about it you went for shock and awe. You backed me into a corner I can’t get out of without sounding like a heartless bitch. And the most fucked-up part is you did it by design. You wanted me here, struggling.”
Goddamn, she was right.
Please, Wilson, just tell me what you’re thinking.
Barb’s voice echoed in my mind.
Why hadn’t I told her I didn’t want to continue trying for a family? Why had I stupidly stayed quiet?
“You’re right,” I told her. “You’re fucking right. Which proves I’m the asshole I’m trying to tell you I am.”
Atlee’s brown eyes filled with tears and by the time they started to roll down her cheeks I felt like what was left of me was dying.
“You win,” she whispered.
The front door opened and she used that as her opportunity to escape, leaving me in ruins.
I’d been wrong.
I’d been so worried about what I would do to Atlee when I should’ve been concerned with what was going to happen to me after she left me.
Now I knew.
Total devastation.
“Wilson,” Asher called.
I looked up from the spot where Atlee had been standing and watched Asher flinch.
“Fuck,” he muttered.
“That about sums it up,” I told him and went to my room.
