AllFreeNovel
Share Us
I roll my eyes.
“We both know you, though. You really want him to kiss your forehead just ahead of giving you a hand necklace while railing you against a wall. Or… what was that fantasy you told everyone about that night at the campground? The 24/7 total power dynamic for a weekend thing? And he never did any of that. He looked like he wanted to clutch his pearls when you suggested it. He’s Mister Vanilla. No, more like Mister baked potato without butter, salt, or pepper. Now’s your chance to get yourself a loaded baked potato. Sour cream. Cheese. Bacon and chives. All kinds of butter. The works. I know… join that hookup app for kinky people.”
I snicker derisively. Adam talking about being unable to keep up with me was sobering. And I know he was embarrassed when we went on that group camping trip last summer and played drunken truth or dare around the fire. He muttered, “Grow up, Chloe” instead of getting a hard-on and whisking me to our tent to dominate me. The next day he acted like nothing had happened but from then on, he seemed to get bitchy if I went beyond one or two drinks at a party, occasionally even asking me to remember to have some decorum.
“Imagine what’ll happen to you in ten years when you hit forty and your sexual peak? Imagine having no ability to do anything about it other than dream about it, fantasize about it while being afraid to even do something about it because you don’t want him to hear the buzzing?” Alannah raises her eyebrows pointedly.
I shake my head. “It’s too soon. I shouldn’t have done what I did. I was a little tipsy and I’d been reading something sexy that I wrote years ago on an old fantasy blog of mine, and it was an asshole move. Thinking he’d reach over and want anything to do with helping me come when his parts don’t work anymore? It was selfish. And probably insulting.”
“Stop it,” she hisses. “Don’t do that. You’re not an asshole and it’s not selfish to try to move forward with life after half a year, Chlo.”
I sigh.
“You are not an asshole,” she repeats firmly. “His fingers aren’t paralyzed. His tongue still works, right? He’s working again. He’s working out. He’s hanging with his boys. Playing fantasy football and telling jokes and dropping F-bombs on their Discord chat while playing video games with his buddies.”
“How do you know that?” Adam almost never drops F-bombs around me. He thinks it’s rude to swear around women. I asked him to dirty-talk when we first got together, and he told me it would be demeaning to me.
She shrugs. “I crashed at Craig’s the other night. Woke up at three in the morning and heard them talking on chat in the other room. He sounded like old Adam.”
I gasp. And she knows it’s because she spent another night with Craig, Adam’s best friend.
“Just a booty call.” She waves her hand.
Yeah. Booty call number five if I haven’t lost count.
“Could it be? Is my breast friend in danger of finding herself in a situationship?”
“Hush; this is about you. Adam is living life in his new life. It’s absolutely fair to expect forehead kisses and clit kisses and whatever else he can give you to make sure you’re fulfilled.”
I palm my face in exasperation. “Inside voice!”
“Sister, you’ve been his live-in nursemaid and chauffeur for months. Asking for more than a peck on the cheek from the man you’re planning to marry doesn’t make you an asshole. He’s given you permission to get your freak on, so now… let’s get this show on the road. You’re getting laid tonight.”
“No way. Shush.”
“Yes way,” she declares. “I can see you shaved your legs today. But what about your pits? Your hoo-ha?”
“I’ve kept up on the lady-scaping. Out of pure hope. All along. Nothing to do with the hall pass.”
“So, no baby unicorns need to die today. It’s been a genocide lately thanks to your dry spell. Let’s save some lives.”
“Stop it. You’re not the boss of my vagina,” I say, too loud, too.
She tries to fight off laughter while she sips her drink. I take a gulp of mine, followed by another gulp.
And now we’re exchanging looks loaded with feelings.
I look away so we don’t dissolve into puddles of emotion. If I shed a tear, she’ll bawl. If she does, I’ll bawl. It’s better we avoid eye contact for a minute.
“Seriously,” I go on, staring at my nails. “I just wanna celebrate with you tonight. Enjoy having my hair down for the first time in months. Have a girls’ weekend with zero stress. I’ll think on that hall pass stuff later. I just wanted to vent about it a bit; not act on it.”
“Well, I’m here any time. Sounds like you’ve been holding back on the venting, and you know that’s my job as your breast friend to be that ear, right?”
“Right. Ditto,” I say and give her a look, which she immediately reads.
“Craig’s just a booty call. He has a big dick and he doesn’t have any expectations, so it works.”
I raise my hands. “Fine, I’ll drop it.”
