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“Where are you going, Queen?” he asks, his eyes sparkling behind the mask. “The fun isn’t over yet.”
My stomach roils, my eyes latching onto the moving head. “I can’t.”
“You can,” Diamond says, his eyes hard, “and you will. You are one of us. We obey the call. Now you will too.”
Without any other choice, I slowly descend the last few steps.
Chapter
Seventeen
The call only seems to explode, expanding in my chest as my feet hit the concrete floor of the basement. I almost crumple from the force. My eyes begin to water as I try to fight it, and I do not understand what it wants. The man is dead.
Chest heaving, I raise my eyes as Diamond stops before me. His hand tilts my chin up so I face him fully.
“You are one of us. You made that choice, Queen. Deep down, you knew what we were when you called for us,” he murmurs seductively.
“I was dying!” I protest, despite his words working deep into my soul.
“You were weak,” he snaps as I shrink. “You still are. Do you want to be weak for the rest of your life, or do you want to be strong? Do you want to live as a victim forever or as a villain? It’s your choice, but you must make it.” He steps back. “The call must be answered.”
The others repeat it as I glance between them, the call only increasing until I can’t draw in a full breath. The pounding power demands to be answered, to be heard.
The cirque demands I accept.
It beats in time with my racing heart as I look around at them and then to the body. He was evil, just like my husband. He hurt people. Did he deserve to die? Who are we to decide? Then I look at the man’s prisoner, meeting her eyes, and I know she deserved to decide, not us.
The victims deserve to decide.
That is cirque’s power. It gives choices back to the powerless. It gives them a chance at revenge, at redemption. Maybe that’s messed up, but only those who have walked in darkness can understand that because even when they are brought back into the light, the shadows still cling to you.
We will never be normal people after what we have endured.
We have been scarred by our history. Cirque knows that. It understands that there are shades of gray. We are the answer to the evil within this world.
Suddenly, I understand. I know what they want.
I relax into it, and the pain subsides as the call carries me across the room until I stand before the woman. She looks up at me through thick lashes, and in her eyes, I see familiar ghosts, ones that haunt me. Looking into her bright blues is like looking in a mirror. She reminds me so much of myself. The hopelessness, pain, and terror stains the soul, but she isn’t broken, just like I’m not.
Maybe cirque wants to welcome me by helping me understand.
“I was given a choice, and now you have one.” The words flow from me, brought by something deeper. The cirque speaks through me. It collects souls as payment, but only willing ones, then it turns us into its weapons.
“A choice?” she asks, staring at me in surprise.
“We answered your call.” I nod at the card. “I know that all too well. You can come with us to Cirque Obscurum and find a new home with us. You will serve the cards as we do. Or you can be free to start again. It’s your choice.” I lay it out as factually as I can. I want her to decide what’s best for her, and part of me is curious what she will pick.
I chose the cirque so easily. Will she be the same?
As she debates, I see her face clearly, and a small if slightly shaky smile curls her lips. “I want to go home. I want a second chance at my life if that’s okay.”
It surprises me, and I’m quiet as I watch her. Will the cirque really let her go? Can she return to a normal life?
Am I the odd one for choosing to stay? For accepting cirque and the dark, clawed hand it offered?
Did I make a mistake?
Diamond steps up when I don’t speak. “Of course. Allow us to free you.” They unchain her and offer her clothes before Spade silently hands over the man’s wallet. “His money is yours. It’s the least he can do. Take anything you wish.”
