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We get to the turn that leads home, but Tex sniffs the path and takes the right instead. It’s a longer route, but Espresso Yourself is in that direction. Tex has recently been introduced to whipped cream in a cup and can’t get enough. He’s right, though; we should definitely celebrate.
I am happy. For the first time in a long time, I am happy. A lightness has overcome me, and when I think of the future, it’s filled with possibilities that just a few short weeks ago seemed impossible. The last time I felt this way was pre-enlistment. My heart feels light, and my mind is clear.
Penny and I may not have completely defined our relationship, but we have crossed the biggest hurdle. All this while, I held on to the affection, afraid it would break me to pieces if I dared admit it. Yet, the moment I let it slip past my lips, my world finally shifted and balanced. It’s like I’ve finally found my peace.
If I had known that admitting my feelings to Penny would be so freeing, I would have done it a long time ago. After all, there was never a time I didn’t feel this way. There was never a time I didn’t look at Penny and feel weak in the knees. I should have just told her how I felt.
I shake my head, and laugh at myself; fear does funny things to a man.
Tex starts to prance as we near Espresso Yourself, and I laugh at his excitement. Not that I can blame him, especially now that the different aromas from the shop are hitting me.
“Relax, bub,” I gently scold him when he tugs on the leash. “We’re almost there.”
It’s late evening, and the shop isn’t as crowded as it is in the mornings and afternoons. I walk inside, heading straight for the counter. There’s a man ahead of me, and I wait patiently for him to get his order before stepping up.
“Good evening.” I smile at the barista behind the counter.
She smiles at me. “What can I get for you today?”
I place my order, pay, and then move to the side while I wait.
“Thank you,” I say as I pick up both my order and Tex’s from the counter.
“Liam?” An eerily familiar voice cuts through my bubble of bliss. I haven’t heard that voice in years, but I already know who it belongs to, even without turning. “Oh, Liam, it is you. I thought it was a trick of the light.”
The owner of the voice materializes before me, and I force a smile at the brown-haired man grinning at me.
“Andrew.” I shake the hand extended to me. “It’s so good to see you.”
“Is it?” He teases me. “You’ve changed.” His gaze roams over my body, and I freeze. We weren’t best friends, but we were good friends. But now, I’m uncomfortable being around him. Instead, his grin widens. “You’re more buff. Have you been going to the gym?”
I force a laugh. “The military will do that to you. And working at a survival camp in the mountains, I walk and hike daily. So I’ve been staying active.”
“You look good,” he repeats, and there’s genuineness in his eyes that has my stomach knotting. A coldness comes over me knowing that he knows about Penny and I. I feel an overwhelming sense of guilt, like I stole her from him.
“You don’t look bad either, Andrew,” I respond, feeling more uncomfortable with his easy smile and nature.
“I know.” He winks. “I’m just back from a vacation where all I did was eat and lounge in the sun.”
“Excuse me,” someone says hurriedly, brushing past us, a reminder that we’re blocking the entry.
“Can we sit?” Andrew points to the closest booth. “Talk for a minute?”
My pulse picks up and I want to tell him no, but guilt cripples me, and all I can think of is granting him whatever he wants.
“Sure,” I mumble reluctantly.
Andrew walks to the booth, and I pull Tex along. When I sit, I place his cup of whipped cream on the floor and he laps it up immediately.
“Liam, I am so happy to see you back home. You’re a hero, man,” he continues. “Risking your life to save innocent souls. You—”
I cock my head at him, frown and interrupt him. “How’d you know I was search and rescue?”
“Penny mentioned it one time.”
There’s a static friction between us, and again, and my guilt thickens.
“You know Penny used to talk about you a lot,” Andrew says with a smile. “She—”
